This was a slightly more subtle twist on another thread about generation gaps and dating older or younger than you. Do we feel this is acceptable in todays age.

Of course - absolutely. Age is only two figures on a piece of paper, after all, and if two people are happy despite their age difference, that's wonderful.

well, of course, we have indiscriminately chosen cut off ages,,not for sex, but for choice of sexual partner

so, though its legal for 16 and 19 year old to be 'dating',, a 16 and 30 year old in the same activities would be frowned upon and probably illegal

but speaking of consenting adults, I think there is still stigma based upon age gaps,,,more so for the older woman and younger man, than for the older man and younger woman

oddly enough, the woman is usually seen in the poor light, either as a cougar or a golddigger,,, and the man is just being a man seeking what works best for him

I personally don't care what age others date, though I do feel its weird to date someone who is FAR out of your decade of birth, cause I don't see how much people in that situation could have in common and it seems like one would either have to regress back to the time of life of their younger partner, or the other would have to skip the experiences they have yet to have in order to be compatible with their older partner

for me,, there is a minimum age based upon my oldest sons age, of at least 15 years older than he is and there is a maximum of no more than ten years older than I am

Yes of course actually it seem almost natural ..


Time and people change ..well people become less ignorant .

the training and trainee thing sounds interesting though, regardless of age,,lol

This. Which in itself explains why age is not just two numbers on a piece of paper. Sure if two ppl are happy, great. But to say age doesn't matter, sorry... I don't buy into that. Like saying size doesn't matter. Both hollow phrases, prolly invented by ppl in that situation (being a lot older or younger than their partner) so they have something to say when they feel awkward?
I'd find it more interesting, and honest, if ppl would simply say "Yes, it ain't easy being so much older/younger, but in spite of ... we love each other lots!"

I think disparate age relationships are becoming ever more acceptable.

Simply because anymore relationships are being used as a means of individual self actualization, something to promote self image and provide gratification, with other people simply tools of the process.

e.g. a (mis)quote from another thread "I want a boyfriend, but men are just annoying."

The natural, biological, process that occurs between people to create, cement, promote, and support relationships for the sake of communal strength, security, and protection of offspring is fought against more than understood, accepted, and supported.

e.g. "FWB is a healthy relationship! It doesn't have expectations or complications!"

Relationships are becoming less of something that is perceived in hindsight and understood as it develops so much as something people attempt to control and build in a way that fulfills parochial self interest.

So, I think more of "we" (in the westernized world at least) are finding disparate age relationships more acceptable since they can fulfill someones solipsistic purpose.

Other than that I am not sure I am understanding the title of the thread as it relates to the rest of the OP.

It's not for everybody ..people live the life they love .

2 criteria

-consenting
-adult humans

To borrow from a good friend, "Love who you love."

and love them often!!!

I think she trained me. One of her friends told me she had an older guy she was with before she made me. And after she left me she was already with another one. I learned to be more careful and am more cautious now. Even when you have the best of intentions you can still get hurt. Like Hill Street Blues warns, "Lets be careful out there."

Hahaha and so true!...

Hi ((((Roy))))

and love them often!!!




That sounds like a great plan, just need to get myself down the supermarket tomorrow and start pushing and pulling....the trolley of course x

Just the suggestion has to be one or the other illustrates the inequality in that kind of relationship. If your thing is not to ever be equals then well go for it. Personally I would rather be drawn and quartered.

You will have them at "Hello"...

there are two parts to your question.

train or be trained?

and

age gap in dating?

to the second part, each person does what works for them. dating younger guys isn't for me. there is the difference in life experience. also, I wouldn't enjoy going places and feeling like everyone's grandma, as has been the case when I've done the social scene with some of my younger cousins.

as for the train ir be trained question,
I think it's the same as give and take in a relationship. train and be trained to me means learning about each other. knowing that your partner is grouchy because of hunger/low blood sugar. not engaging in an argument vefore shoving food in his mouth.
them learning that some things in life overwhelm you and learning how to just let you vent without trying to fix anything.

I know, right? I can remember when my ego wouldn't dare let me show just how vulnerable I am. But I think it makes me feel more human. Always felt like I was an easy mark. Some adages are just so true. There is no fool like an old fool. The strangest thing though is when you have real friends they will check up on you because they know you are vulnerable. One thing I did right was to make friends with women who have boyfriends and women who are married. You would be amazed how much they have your back because the last thing they would want to do would be to lose you as a friend for your friendship is valuable to them.

Hi ((((Leigh))))

What a great post my friend!!...No, I would not be amazed...We (women) are very protective and nurturing that way.....To have good friends, you must first be a good friend...It's easy to see why they love you Roy...