Hi in this forum most of the time i see western women are divorced and that to at pretty young age {nothing wrong if they want too} but i want to know why is this so common ?In my country India DIVORCE are rare when i see my parents both in love mutual admiration and respect i often wonder that it's not so hard to be married .

Is it really very common in west to get divorced or it just some individuals .

coz in our country once married u r expected to be pillar to each other till the end come.

It used to be that way here too, forever after.

Too many bad things happen when people are forced
to stay together.

Here, free choice, free will.

Alright, you start from the premise that a lot of marriages in the west don't work.

Then you say that your parents love each other.

Then you say that in your country it's an until death do us part thing.

There's a flaw in your argument somewhere. I could attack the second or third premise by saying that your parents really don't love each other, or that they shouldn't be burned at the stake if they get at a divorce. Hope this helps.

Divorce is common in usa because to many people are good at games and feeding you a line of "s".

on the pragmatic side, americans dont force someone to stay with somebody who turns out to not truly be the type of person they lead you to believe they were.

Ideally in our country, this was the way it was supposed to be. That said, there is no reason to stay with someone who may be abusive physically, mentally or emotionally to the wife/husband and children, if they have any. Because cultures change through bad choices on the part of some people, it should not sentence the good ones to a life of misery where there is no love and respect or admiration within the family unit. I happen to know of people who are married in your country who are in their marriage, not for love, respect or admiration and they are eager to get out of it, even if it means moving to another country to do so. In my humble opinion, these people are already divorced in their minds and a piece of paper is of no consequence to them. The effect on the family is the same. There are many people in your country who are single and wish to meet someone from the western countries, which seems unusual if marriage is so highly valued in their country; nevertheless, that's what they are doing.

I just think its cultural, personally

the family is not promoted so much and certainly not as a 'unit' as much as it once was in the west,, people are more detached from each other personally and more 'tuned in' to each other through electronics

its just easier in such a culture to have distractions and false 'greener fields'

I think cultures with less of the 'technological invasion' stick with more traditional cultures and stronger enforcement of the family and community as a unit,,,


just my opinion though

You have not understood my point see by referring to my parents i meant was that both of them are in love even after so many years they are not together just for the sake of being together or duty bound but they they are out of love same is the case with majority of couples i see around .

It is not that we do not have divorce here they do happen but not so much as in west.{I am not saying that one has to stay in marriage even if there is no love or respect at all }I only meant that it seem too common in west and i wonder why?

UR opinion is spot on u r one smart lady

My parents are still married and in love. I kind of think that people here in the US are spoiled and they don't care enough about trying to make things work. So when things get rocky they split. We live in a time when people expect instant gratification. Plus I think some people simply get married to early in life. They are pressured into it by family and friends or religious leaders. They're not ready at all to start a family when they get married. Meaning they don't really have a job or stability. So that adds more stress into their lives. Raising kids is hard enough. Trying to do it when you work at a crappy job and can't support your spouse is hard enough. Add kids to the mix and it's just going to get worse.

Just want to correct one thing though and that is"technological invasion"

It is as much here as it is in the west when it comes to cities .And even in small villages cell phones cable tv are common and now even the laptop some state gov are distributing them for free.

Again a great ans and spot on analysis .I agree with you i hope it does not ever get so over here.{a big thumbs up to you}

Marriage used to be like that here to"Then" they invented a CAMERA here called the (Polaroid Swinger) Take the shot,count it down,zip it off. 60seconds you had a picture! Now days Marriage is patterned after it!! I'm just waiting now for that"till death do us part" clause other be omitted and" until the next one comes along" is added because both ignore (LOVE,HONOR,OBEY) anyhow!!
Cuts out Attorney Fees!!! Also 2 incomes are better than one"Social Security" I have my good days too out of my streightjacket!!

This answers question?

http://www.firstpost.com/living/the-ugly-truth-about-indian-divorce-why-the-new-cabinet-law-is-important-253387.html

In other words,Indian Women get a Raw Deal if they divorce!

That article is not totally correct in real life in india woman enjoys monthly allowance and right to property of husband after divorce and many other right.{most of the law are more lenient towards women and biased towards male}

Further it would have been a point when there would be many unhappy ,depressed couple who want to separate but can not due to society or tough law.Where as here i see most of the couple happily living and enjoying each other company for rest of their life respect and love is from both side contribution to relationship is equal from both ends.And where such things do not happen couple do take divorce but it's not so much.

Divorces haven't always been easy here either. Not that long ago the only reason for divorce was adultery and there was a time (also not that long ago) that only a man could file for divorce.

Now we have the freedom to choose to stay with a partner or not. We like that freedom, people shouldn't be forced to stay with a partner by law or religion, family or whatever.
Freedom also means being responsible and I think we're still working on that. We haven't had this freedom for centuries, so it's relatively new. Meaning we also have to learn to be responsible in our dealing with it.

You got to look at the bigger picture, not at an individual level.
Basically we have been living in a patriarchal society for thousands of years, we are now moving towards matriarchal society (a.k.a moving from the age of Pisces to the age of Aquarius). The changeover is chaotic and we are living in this changeover time.

I see this thing with high divorce numbers as a positive development. It will level out at some point. It's also a changeover: from no freedom of choice to freedom of choice.
It's normal that ppl go from one extreme to the next before they find the way in the middle.

Some countries are still more patriarchal in their ways, meaning they still haven't got a lot of personal freedom, position of women is still inferior etc. But these countries will change as well.
Maybe read some stuff on matriarchal societies? I think India used to be one, long long time ago.

I also hear i Mexico that all a Native American Woman has to do is sit her man's Saddle outside the door and that was a Divorce? I leave mine outside (always) "she would want that too!!"

are you trying to say that's a good thing??
I mean if you are free to leave anyone,and get divorce ,how many times will you do that??

as many Saddles as you have,obviously!

Now you have me ALL WRONG!!Hell yeah keeping my Saddle- just changing the blanket and horse Good Saddle is hard to find - then there's the breaking in time"sore backside"