Ignorant is stating that your only here for the rants. Im a good guy, believe it or not, and was truly put off by her profile claiming that all men who would speak like that to a women is scum. Maybe the just trying to F her part but some of us men still use hon or dear when speaking to a women and mean no disrespect. Has the world really become so terrible that speaking that way is considered offencive?

Thank you for atleast understanding my point of view and having a decent response.

Hi John

Many of us use the terms you do especially if we are southern raised. Nothing wrong with you being polite and being a gentleman. As many women who will take offense to this there will be many others who appreciate you taking the time and effort to be kind. Be yourself no matter what spin anyone tries to put on it, and if your spin is politeness, God bless you. The world needs more people who are willing to care enough to make endearing comments to those they are in contact with.

So you can go as far as to make this a political debate? Free speach being violated here! I, as a decent individual who naturally speaks using the terms dear and hon all the time merely had an opinion that i wanted to state here in the forums. It really sucks that people like yourself has turned this country into nothing but political debate. I guess using the term "Thanks hon" before pulling away from my bank drivethru is sexual harrassment these days. Thanks for keeping all us Americans in check A.L.F

Exactly, thanks for atleast understanding my point of view and sharing your wise words.

It was a general post looking for feedback in a forum setting without any mention of who this person is or anything of the sort. This "unknown individual" made it a point to judge and group all men together. Just saying, made for good discussion am i right? and as far as ~respect...Right back at ya.

DOH! I wouldnt want to violate her rights or nothing with that filth talk.

Why do people get so upset when some don't like insincere terms of endearment?

Think diversity. Yep, those of us who still speak according to there own upbringing such as "thanks hon" do say it to all kinds of women. Its not meant to be personal to just you, its a way of speaking for some and not always a "come on"..

Of course it's not meant to be personal. And not quite sure how it's diversity.

Not sure how its diversity? We are all different in our own ways according to our upbringings, cultures, ect. Try to be more understanding that some of us dont speak the same as you and that our meanings may differ from others that surround you is all. It blows my mind that such a decent upbringing of saying "thanks hon" or "thank you dear" or any of the sort to a women who deserves a little respect could be taken as far as harrassment. Its almost scarey to be a guy these days.

I typically find that emails using baby, honey, sweetie and other terms of endearments, are from scammers or fakes.. excuses or reasons aside for using them.. a simple Hi, how are you? or something similar is preferable on initial contact..

I just feel that using any form of intimacy before knowing another is disrespectful, which creates an immediate distrust and wariness.. at least it does for me..

John another thing to think about is if the women around you don't get that your being polite and don't understand the difference between when you are being polite to a woman and when you are being loving to your special lady they are more than likely not the type of women you need in your circle. If a woman can not pick up on you being a sincere person they probably have this blind spot regarding others period, and it really has nothing to do with you.

When I run across women like this I try to understand that they probably have had experiences with guys that did not turn out so well and that has stuck with them to the point of being a personality wall. You never know sometimes how strong these walls are until you are the type of person that treats people with kindness and they throw it in your face cause they have an investment in their wall.

But, just think if they get it someday and they realize that this guy was trying to be nice to them in the midst of so many who are cruel.

I totally agree sugar pluml

you are soo hot 'n sexy.. wanna be my special friend?

This thread reminds me of a story.

Many years ago some friends and I moved to Atlanta from South Florida. The girls with me were from New York and Boston. When we rolled into Atlanta we pulled into a gas station and some natives of the area came to the car to greet us. LOL, the girls kept the car windows rolled up and locked the doors. I got out to fill the car and had this great conversation with these complete strangers who saw the Fl plate on the car. The girls were freaked out and it took them a little while to understand their new friendly surroundings.

It wasn't long before my friends were calling everyone sweetie, hun and the other terms common to the culture. I still am in touch with one of these gals and to this day she is a true born again southern bell that would not dream of being anything but sweet to people she knows and strangers alike.

These are my 2 cents on the subject.

IN GENERAL: As forum rule: I would say don't rant about a rant. It does not help anyone and the only thing it does it take space in the forums. As general life rule: If you do not like what someone else have to say about certain topic, do not ear it, do not read it. Unless you live in North Korea or China or a place like that, chances are nobody is forcing you to listen to it. So when you decide that you don't like what it has been said or you have a 100% opposite view on the matter, just move on... don't engage into an evangelistic position regarding your own points of view, rarely something productive comes out of that.

FOR THE "HON" THING IN PARTICULAR: When traveling and specially when interacting over the Internet, try to stick to the most "neutral" / standard version of what ever language you are using to communicate... makes communication misunderstandings less frequent. I only use words like "hon", long after the initial exchanges have been made and when there is certain level of trust already. When starting to interact with someone new you never know where the person was raised, or under what conditions, what his/her moral values are, what type of manner does the person considers appropriated, etc. Stuff like manners, morals, etiquette , honor, respect are fairly subjective; specially when dealing with people from all over the world, contrary to "popular" belief.

Why thank you dahlin man ...Join us later?.... I'm making ma mouth whhhaterin southern fired chicken tonight...

Would be my delite to partake in such a lovely spread. I thank ya kindly.

So why may I ask does a woman take offense to being told that she is beautiful or has a beautiful smile if it is jst a compliment?