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Topic: I think my son is gay
no photo
Sat 12/03/11 04:54 PM

So true,I am just wondering if any of the parent here would just be so accepting and allow their minor son walk around cross-dressing, sport long flawless hair with make-up and all, glide like a ramp model and laugh like there's no tomorrow. It's always easily said than done, I hope we should be all honest to ourselves in how we are going to deal with it, when such situation happens to your own minor son.


This is the internet, nearly everyone owns a moral high horse and boy do they love to ride!

w0m4n's photo
Sat 12/03/11 04:57 PM

Or we can choose to not conform to society and just be who we are.
I think it's more difficult trying to be something your not.





In my opinion, it is always good to guide him to command himself with respect, dignity and decency. So he can receive the same from his peers. But being young at this point it is quiet impossible as kids will always be kids and this is where the problem will start.

w0m4n's photo
Sat 12/03/11 05:04 PM

What's unbecoming though is in the eye of the beholder. What one person likes, the other may not and vice versa. I think we would do well to keep such views at the door when judging a person, and instead base their impressions on who they actually ARE, not what they appear to be. If someone shows love and kindness to people consistently, why should it matter so much what their sexuality is, how they dress or the words they choose to express themselves with?

We make things so much more complicated than they should be.




I only wish that when my son goes to school he will meet people like you and others who posts affirmatively on expressing himself. But in reality we all know that the community he's often surrounding or keeping in touch with were kids with insufficient/ineptitude about issues of being gay.

w0m4n's photo
Sat 12/03/11 05:09 PM




99% of sexual preference is biological


There is no evidence to support this claim. Everything you posted is based on fallacious fact.

If sexual orientation is based on a combination of genetics and upbringing, then the home environment could play a role in sexuality.

But that's ignoring the OP issue! She's worried that her son's behavior (acting like a woman) is going to impact him socially. Surprisingly enough, gay men don't have to act like a woman, they can choose to act like a man. So her issue isn't sexual orientation (although she's not thrilled that he might be gay), but it is him fitting a social norm so that he avoids years of teasing and bullying.




Thank you, you hit the nail right on it's head. I am more worried of him when he acts like a young lady because this will give other kids the reason to treat him differently and or shabbily and how all of these actions will affect him significantly.


I know where you are coming from and I got your back.








really appreciated :smile:






w0m4n's photo
Sat 12/03/11 05:15 PM


to all contributors, thank you so much!

no photo
Sat 12/03/11 07:34 PM



Her son might be straight or he might be gay, either way, he'll find society more accepting if he fits in. That means moderating the feminine behaviors.


Why should he have to change who he is cause a few people get offended? Such people need to learn to live and let live IMO. That seems lost on a lot of people anymore sadly.



who you are is not a CONSTANT, you are professional(hopefully) at work and casual with family,,,,we adapt to the environment, as a form of survival on many levels

behavior is constantly altered on some level depending upon situation and context,, its not a matter of anyone changing 'who they are',, they can behave a number of ways that are all equally part of 'who they are',, and who they are capable of becoming


we are always becoming,, we never stop,,,and its a cultural mistake (in my opinion) to preach otherwise,, or to teach a 'who I am' definitive mentality to individuals


My thoughts exactly! :thumbsup:

no photo
Sat 12/03/11 07:58 PM


Or we can choose to not conform to society and just be who we are.
I think it's more difficult trying to be something your not.





In my opinion, it is always good to guide him to command himself with respect, dignity and decency. So he can receive the same from his peers. But being young at this point it is quiet impossible as kids will always be kids and this is where the problem will start.


I thank you for your patience with all of us and our many conflicting viewpoints.

I know you love your son and his social well-being is a major concern to you.

He is not an adult and he is only testing the waters of life.

Unless I missed the post...I have not read anything here that establishes him as gay. He has not made that declaration...right?

I assure you he is not gay...unless others convince him he is.

People who see his behaviors and pat him on the back saying "It's ok to be gay, honey".

I think people who approach children in that manner are instigators.
they are not far from being child-molesters.


Ladylid2012's photo
Sun 12/04/11 07:33 AM



Or we can choose to not conform to society and just be who we are.
I think it's more difficult trying to be something your not.





In my opinion, it is always good to guide him to command himself with respect, dignity and decency. So he can receive the same from his peers. But being young at this point it is quiet impossible as kids will always be kids and this is where the problem will start.


I thank you for your patience with all of us and our many conflicting viewpoints.

I know you love your son and his social well-being is a major concern to you.

He is not an adult and he is only testing the waters of life.

Unless I missed the post...I have not read anything here that establishes him as gay. He has not made that declaration...right?

I assure you he is not gay...unless others convince him he is.

People who see his behaviors and pat him on the back saying "It's ok to be gay, honey".

I think people who approach children in that manner are instigators.
they are not far from being child-molesters.



and i think those who believe one who supports their children in their own choices being likened to a child molesters is hateful, mentally disturbed, confused and self righteous

msharmony's photo
Sun 12/04/11 10:42 AM




Or we can choose to not conform to society and just be who we are.
I think it's more difficult trying to be something your not.





In my opinion, it is always good to guide him to command himself with respect, dignity and decency. So he can receive the same from his peers. But being young at this point it is quiet impossible as kids will always be kids and this is where the problem will start.


I thank you for your patience with all of us and our many conflicting viewpoints.

I know you love your son and his social well-being is a major concern to you.

He is not an adult and he is only testing the waters of life.

Unless I missed the post...I have not read anything here that establishes him as gay. He has not made that declaration...right?

I assure you he is not gay...unless others convince him he is.

People who see his behaviors and pat him on the back saying "It's ok to be gay, honey".

I think people who approach children in that manner are instigators.
they are not far from being child-molesters.



and i think those who believe one who supports their children in their own choices being likened to a child molesters is hateful, mentally disturbed, confused and self righteous



its not hateful to want to guide children away from 'bad' and unhealthy choices


I Wouldnt tell my child its ok for them to eat to their hearts content, why should I tell them its ok to commit to a life of anal sex...?

Ladylid2012's photo
Sun 12/04/11 10:51 AM
Well all I can say is I raised 3 sons who had their issues. I supported and loved them through it all.
Now grown up, they are happy, productive, kind, NOT gay men!

So there!tongue2

msharmony's photo
Sun 12/04/11 10:56 AM

Well all I can say is I raised 3 sons who had their issues. I supported and loved them through it all.
Now grown up, they are happy, productive, kind, NOT gay men!

So there!tongue2




Thats great

I support my children too, in healthy choices,, and guide them down healthy paths, and they are both happy kids.

no photo
Sun 12/04/11 11:04 AM
Edited by bhernandez on Sun 12/04/11 11:04 AM

I Wouldnt tell my child its ok for them to eat to their hearts content, why should I tell them its ok to commit to a life of anal sex...?


anal sex isn't the only option,
and i doubt it'll kill him.

msharmony's photo
Sun 12/04/11 11:05 AM


I Wouldnt tell my child its ok for them to eat to their hearts content, why should I tell them its ok to commit to a life of anal sex...?


anal sex isn't the only option,
and i doubt it'll kill him.



for two males, its the most realistic option

and hiv kills

no photo
Sun 12/04/11 11:10 AM

for two males, its the most realistic option

and hiv kills


uh...
cyanide kills too.
o.O
since when does anal sex = hiv?

msharmony's photo
Sun 12/04/11 11:15 AM


for two males, its the most realistic option

and hiv kills


uh...
cyanide kills too.
o.O
since when does anal sex = hiv?



it doesnt, is just = a much higher risk

as it does for other std's, anal cancer, and HPV

its a biological EXIT not an entrance, being able to do it doesnt make it a healthy thing to do

no photo
Sun 12/04/11 11:19 AM

it doesnt, is just = a much higher risk

as it does for other std's, anal cancer, and HPV

its a biological EXIT not an entrance, being able to do it doesnt make it a healthy thing to do


you can get any of the above just as easily from a vagina.
it's better to edumacate people about sex than try to prevent.

msharmony's photo
Sun 12/04/11 11:24 AM
Edited by msharmony on Sun 12/04/11 11:25 AM


it doesnt, is just = a much higher risk

as it does for other std's, anal cancer, and HPV

its a biological EXIT not an entrance, being able to do it doesnt make it a healthy thing to do


you can get any of the above just as easily from a vagina.
it's better to edumacate people about sex than try to prevent.




actually, you cant get it anywhere near 'just as easy'


but that type of 'education' is silenced so as not to appear intolerant or 'offend' anyone



no photo
Sun 12/04/11 11:37 AM


it doesnt, is just = a much higher risk

as it does for other std's, anal cancer, and HPV

its a biological EXIT not an entrance, being able to do it doesnt make it a healthy thing to do


you can get any of the above just as easily from a vagina.
it's better to edumacate people about sex than try to prevent.



Wow, do you slow down at all to research the facts? The vagina is 3 layers of skin thick, the rectum is 1 layer thick. The rectum is much more likely to rip and allow semen, feces and bacteria into the abdominal cavity. That's the fact. It's not hating on gays, it's not bigotry, it's the truth.


no photo
Sun 12/04/11 11:38 AM

actually, you cant get it anywhere near 'just as easy'


but that type of 'education' is silenced so as not to appear intolerant or 'offend' anyone


because we all know vaginas are completely disease free.
if anyone knows anything about anal sex they know how thin the lining is
and they'd take precautions.
that's where the education comes in.

no photo
Sun 12/04/11 11:41 AM

Wow, do you slow down at all to research the facts? The vagina is 3 layers of skin thick, the rectum is 1 layer thick. The rectum is much more likely to rip and allow semen, feces and bacteria into the abdominal cavity. That's the fact. It's not hating on gays, it's not bigotry, it's the truth.



i never said it was.
i'm well aware.
i'm just saying any type of unprotected sex involves risks,
not just anal.
if we're just talking diseases here then i'd recommend traditional penetration to be deemed 'unhealthy' as well.

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