When you meet someone, what makes you ask them on a date? Based on past experiences, what are some things that caught your interest enough to ask someone out?

When a woman proves to be genuienly unique in someway, if that proves to be something I'm interested in I try and see where that goes.

This is like the toughest question in the world for me. I don't understand chemistry at all. I know the feeling I get when I want to be with someone but pointing out what did it I have no clue. This may sound corny but there's a sweetness in the air when it happens. It's a love sense. Just like touching, smelling, tasting, hearing or seeing. I don't go out on dates, I go out on love quests.

weird aren't I

Why is it a tough question? What has made you ask someone out in the past?

hmmmm, her smile... her appearance... how she carries herself... how she communicates... if I feel a connection somehow... sometimes it has been purely on personality, sometimes it has been on pure impulse... sometimes I don't know why... It is that feeling, the feeling that stirrs inside enough to drive me to say something, flirt... and ask her out...

It's a multifaceted experience that in some ways is the same, but yet different every time - for every situation. The reason for me is not usually the same... no formula...

$.02

Lots of views, but no one wants to let us know what got their attention enough to ask someone out?

A feeling I get if I'm around them or talk to them. Can't say it's a particular thing that happened or even the way they looked. It was more the way they made me feel.

Ok I will bite. Lets start from the beginning though. Usually its appearance that will make me start a conversation with them. Then once you are in the conversation it leans more to their attitude, are they interested in talking to me? Do they keep the conversation going? Then it also goes to personality and how it matches with mine.

Now maybe its a group setting or someone approaches me. I won't blow someone off because of how they look and if the other things match up enough I may eventually find them more attractive. When I ended up have a year long fling with my Japanese tutor my first impression of her was that she was just average and I wasn't that into her. She had asked me out for coffee and wore perfume. Was asking me about my interests in movies and such and I got the impression she liked me and so I asked her out. As we spent more and more time together I like her more and she became more beautiful in my eyes.

Anyway I am also a bit shy so if I don't feel some connection I usually am not too assertive. I will ask for the date and such but if there doesn't seem to be anything there then I leave it as such.

there's that undefinable spark, that says we have enough common ground to have a conversation, and enough uncommon to make it interesting, for us both. and if he says let's go for a snowball, instead of drinks.... or to a museum instead of the movies, it's a no brainer.

Do they have snowballs in MD? I thought those were New Orleans style.
NVM i found it.
"Snowball culture quickly receded to Baltimore, the Jersey Shore and Philadelphia, New Orleans, and Hawaii. "

everywhere, a friend of mine even owns a stand and business is booming right now. they are seasonal, but gives us something to look forward to i suppose!

oops,,,wrote before i saw your edit!

I'm a nut for eyes and what they show about the person. Another thing is how they carry themself. I like a woman who has a confident walk without the cockiness. Voice is another big thing with me, I cannot stand women that have a voice like minnie mouse.

I'm a sucker for long hair.

I've heard time and time again that men say it's the way she makes me feel when I'm with her. Pray tell,what kind of feeling is it that you men feel?

Different ways I would have to say depending on them. There have been those wild and reckless times. Like a shot in the dark and I have been shot down before. Like when you ask them out for a date and they tell you that their husband wouldn't approve. Or like when you think they feel the same way but it was mistaken that they are desirable to the point that they are already engaged to someone else like a boyfriend and sometimes even a girlfriend. Or like when you think this is just all in my head but maybe if I approach them and just suggest something simple like something I wanted to do anyways and maybe they would like to do the same thing. Or like when you go through what their girlfriend is hinting to you but you haven't heard her say that. Like, I was just curious if you might want to go see this or do that if you are not busy. And then there is always the direct approach where you just ask and just die later if she didn't feel the same way. Research work can help.

We have a girl that drives school bus for another district other than ours and when she comes across on the radio she sounds like she's ten years old . Girls don't care for minnie mouse voices either

She would have to demonstrate both intellectual AND emotional intelligence. And that's not something than can be determined quickly.

I would insist on a 'Friends first' relationship before I got into a serious long-term relationship, but have found that that's not a recipe for success in the online dating world. Still, I'm not going to change-- I don't have to, I can find ways to fill my life with interesting pursuits without having romance if necessary.

-Kerry O.

Listen to this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xw-_zLkGn5s

I don't know how true this is for every man, some are so involved in their own egos that this goes right over their head and they are truly men who need a servant and not a lover. These men think of women as nothing more than objects and treat women either to their face or behind their backs as possessions. They will lie straight to your face and tell you everything you want to hear, but if you heard them behind the scenes you would see that you are nothing more than the locker room topic. There is also the flip side to this (as heard in the youtube video). Men who fall so deep in a moment that they loose their ability to put a handle on why, it just is. These are the men that will love you beyond life and beyond themselves. It's an essence that these men go for. You can walk by them with a sweet smelling perfume and they are in-love. "don't know what it is". These men are built to worship women and no man better say a thing about that feeling they have being anything but true.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oZGE-Y1C_nk&feature=related

There are men who think in terms of body parts and men who think in terms of a deep need to find out if you are going to be their savior in love.

The 2 week hustle. Both men and women do the 2 week hustle. It's basically the human mating ritual to see if it's going to stick. This is a blind dive for a guy and during this time he wants to suck you dry of your essence. This isn't always a bad thing if you both can get a grip on the ritual but it can also be a hurtful thing for the one who loses out on their heart. Men are on the look out for this ritual and are highly sensitive to the sexual vibe of the woman in a Christmas present sort of way. Good for the moment gets old in 2 weeks, time to move to the next present. These are the men you never get to say I do. You might as well look at them as signing the rental agreement cause that's all your getting.

When you talk about what men see before they ask a woman out you might want to think about what is their position in thought at the time cause without a doubt they have one and this is what they are looking at you with when sizing you up for a potential date.

There's one more guy. The perfect friend! This guy looks at you for who you are and sees the value that you have to give to him, yourself, and to the world. When he looks at you to go out with he is digging to bring that something out of you that you didn't know you had. Many girls miss this intention completely cause they are not being flattered, but this guy is looking at the companion in you. He doesn't see an object, he sees worth. This guy still may come on as strong as the others or lay back giving space but he is taking in everything you are saying and making notes. He is happy to be with you but he is just as happy to watch you find true love in someone else. He's got your back as a person. A lot of girls walk away from this guy but the one that marries him will have a partner to the death.

So see, when you ask a guy what he sees or what he looks for it all depends on who the guys is. All three guys could say "great legs" but mean it in three different or more ways.

The middle guy is who you were referring to. We have the potential to be the other guys but we are blinded by your Vibe and see everything about you as beautiful from a romance novel point of view. The feeling can't really be described cause it's like being in a movie and you are the star. Our senses are on high alert and we can be orgasmic (I say this without meaning to be vulgar) on almost anything you do, look, or say. We literally don't know what it is, we only know we want you in some way.

sorry for the book, it's just that the question deserved a real answer

For me, this question really isn't that hard.

I've asked a girls out for different reasons. Sometimes I was physically attracted. Sometimes I had a good read on personality, and was physically attracted. Other times, I wasn't looking for anything serious so I would find a like-minded gal who I enjoyed being around.

As we grow older, things change....our priorities, want, and needs change.

So that's when I go back to two relationships I had when I was young, and I remember a helpful little thing.

When I make a connection with a woman - you know, when you are just innocently talking without looking for anything and you both hit it off really well on multiple levels - I will get that breathless feeling like when I was teenager with my first two girlfriends. That sensation is like an alarm going off, telling me, "if you don't make a move, your going to kick yourself for not trying." Even if she refuses, I feel better for making the attempt, but that feeling doesn't happen very often. In fact, that feeling is what got me to ask out my second girlfriend after talking with her into the wee hours of the morning.

So, give me good conversation, and if everything is really clicking and holding my interest to the point where I am blocking everything and everyone else out, there is a good chance I may get that feeling. In the meantime, I'm processing everything - words, subject, appearance, body language....everything - as I gauge her level interest. And then there are the times when you misread some clue....and get it all wrong.

Sorry Em. (327am)

It IS that "certain something" with the great French word and spelling that I dare NOT right now. I'd like to think that there is a natural, unnatural attraction that has propogated the species