and youre on a dating website?!?! ahhhhh f*** me!!! i quit.

I don't think this guy is ever going to get it.



Neither do I, Sing....

Ladies I value your general opinions very much.

That being said, I don't think you're being fair here. The OP is oozing with frustration. I see it! He's reaching out to strangers trying to figure it out... instead of going to some "lady friend" for advice.

In General, is it ok to share intimate details about YOUR relationship with someone other than YOUR boyfriend? In my experience, discussions about the "cons" often take precedence over the "friendship".

Off topic but it relates

I had a exGF who once said: John, you were right about(insert subject here)
I said: We had that talk 3 weeks ago... what gives?

She says: Oh...I asked Mike(the good guy friend) about it and he confirms you were right.(BTW I never even met this guy)

Sounds innocent enough.... but all I could think of was... "What!? you needed this guy to confirm what I said was true??? Like what I say is NOT true usually?

It's ok to be emotionally unfaithful for Women? BUT

It's NOT ok to be physically unfaithful for Men?


I know it's like mixing apples and oranges but you do know
Men and Women think differently right???? what makes one worse than the other?.... the physical part.... Righttttt!

The only time I ever make a friend of the opposite sex, is when I need to set an example to a significant other that they are getting too close to another man.

In that case, it's very easy to make quick friends with very attractive, fit women that will make my significant other uncomfortable. They always tell me "that's different!". Then they sulk for days, and cut back on spending time with those male friends, or they end the relationship and wind up with the male friend.

Okay, I just read all but the last page of this thread...

Kevin, I know you just "gave up", but the truth is you hung in there longer than most given the majority of posts. But, I think the issue has been clouded somewhat, to the point where you may have missed the point.

1) Your SO has insecurity and trust issues. Maybe they aren't because of you, but being chummy with another woman just to make her jealous does not help. If she can't open up to you about her insecurities, then she's not ready for a serious relationship.

a) If having a female friend was your last resort, and it didn't work, then she is unlikely to change her behavior. I.E., she just doesn't get it, nor does she want to get it.

2) It sounds like this woman is not the right one for you. Move on. If you are faithful, a good communicator, and considerate of others, you have a great chance of finding a woman who is right for you. By trying to make it work, you are wasting your time. I'm assuming your honesty here, so she is more likely to bounce from relationship to relationship than you are. Her loss.


Now....my own experience...

At least where I live, there is a double-standard, especially amongst younger women. Men are not supposed to have female friends, but women are allowed to have male friends. Personally, I think it's all bulls**t.

My last relationship ended because a so-called female friend sought to break us up. This person played off my ex's insecurities. My ex asked me to cut myself off from my female friends, simply because one of them made her paranoid. Now, my ex had discovered her previous ex (the father of her two sons) in bed with another woman. That's why she allowed these rumors to bother her....she didn't want a repeat. I understood that, but she couldn't handle it enough to talk about it. I was given the boot unjustly, but not before I said a few things to make her think. I know she will regret it someday, but she burned that bridge for me. Now she has to accept that I am gone forever, and it was her choice.

On my end, I learned a lesson about so-called "friends" who are really just opportunists. I also am now with a woman that I know I belong with. It's a completely different feeling than I expected, and something no one else ever made me feel. I have no doubt. Plus, she allows me to keep my friends. I allow her to do the same. Now, I shut out the distractions of the false friends. It's my own choice to do so. No one is asking me to do it.

I thought I had something else to say, but I seem to have lost my train of thought....

It's a group of "friends" (men in this case) who agree with everything a woman thinks or says.... Let's call them The YES Men

Better?

So what do you talk to your friends about then, if not about your relationship? Where I work that's all they talk about- kids, spouses, and relationships. And it's not just women either, so men do it too.