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| Topic: Self esteem | |
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sorry if ive ruined this thread people but this is something im very passionate about ive not only been through this sort of stuff but ive helped other people who've been through it to i just dont think it should be taken so lightly You have not ruined the thread....Honestly I think some are in denial that they have had their self esteem lowered from time to time....... 
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The ego is inherently ruled by external circumstances... since that is what it is constructed around, more-so than the other parts of the psyche.
There are countless idioms about this topic, though... that make a lot of sense. Like... "Allow things to affect but not change you." I'm what is commonly referred to as "...an egomaniac with an inferiority complex." |
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This is not a contest who was the most persecuted ...
 You've no idea what any of us have been through, we are documenting the goal post ... ... NOT the incredibly, long hard road and how we EXACTLY got this "win"! Yours to choose to listen and grow, change ...  Or stay in it and decay ... |
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yea my mom gave me some advice too knock them the f out but its just not enough yea they have horrible self esteem issues among other mental issues i realized that a long time ago but the simple fact is if you dont let it out how long before it becomes too much and you snap either severely scarring you or the worse outcome you decide to overdose or throw yourself off a building and i make it public knowledge about my problems so that people may realise the effect it has and see what there really doing to those people my life might be worthless to me but if i can help just one person and save them from what i had to endure then it gives my life meaning and id much rather have been through all this and be able to understand the problem fully so that i might help someone else who really needs it thenhave had an easy life where i wasnt a victim
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Our own minds can be the biggest bully ...
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have i claimed that anyone has had it easier then i have?
or that im the one with the most problems? not at all i know theres millions maybe billions of people worse off then i am and that have been through much much worse what im trying to get through is that its not always as simple as ignoring an insult |
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True the power is yours but in reality one has to realize that at times many have been convinced they are not worthwhile and that power seems to be shoved aside at times....... So even though the power is yours at times others can take you down. I have seen it happen more then once. I have seen those on here that say they have that power but then let others words get to them........... The way I see it that can go either way at times words can even take the strongest ones to their knees.........  Agree words are mighty powerful, but up to the individual to determine and allow it to cause harm or boost one's self esteem. It's not what is said, nor who says it but how I take it and what I answer to. How ya doing Kristi?  Doing good where ya been hiding shshhssh did ya find ya a hot toddy to hang out with  wishful thinking - been going thru a lot but back for entertainment purposes only 
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Edited by
Dancere
on
Tue 05/25/10 09:45 AM
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Think it best to just read your own comments and the replies, and the original thread replies and digest ...
Can't process anything until you can digest this first ... Much is being missed, glossed over, in efforts to continue to inform us of your personal situation, rather than our thoughts of a bigger picture of us ALL ... I'm out ... Peace ...
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have i claimed that anyone has had it easier then i have? or that im the one with the most problems? not at all i know theres millions maybe billions of people worse off then i am and that have been through much much worse what im trying to get through is that its not always as simple as ignoring an insult Oh but it is blood_vayne - once you can truly recognize your own worth, no one will be able to lower it unless you allow it. Notice I said once one recognizes it. |
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that i agree with dancere but let me ask you something
who puts these ideas into our minds to begin with? society? always claiming that someone isnt good enough? family? who for some people tell them how worthless they are and continously remind them of it? an abusive childhood? or all of the above this isnt a question that can be answered because no matter how much anyone simplifies it it will never be a simple subject nor will it ever be as simple as it may look |
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maybe you should read over ive already explained why i put my situation in public view honestly im well beyond caring about pity or attention im happy with who ive become regardless of how i became that person but insecurities and issues cant just be swept away like they never were they have too be faced and trust me if i was wanting pure attention id start a new topic and get started on my life story
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Self esteem is within, but it can be (and is) affected by the people around us. Scenario...you think you're an okay basketball player. You go to the local backyard playground, and lo and behold, you're friggen Michael Jordan out there. Trot onto the NBA court though and you soon realize you're severely inadequate. As long as you keep things in perspective, your self esteem shouldn't be affected by either venue.
How we see ourselves depends on the situation. Self esteem, to me, is merely the ability to honestly evaluate your assets and faults and accept them, accept yourself for who you are. I have struggled with self esteem issues my whole life, and while I know I'm a good person, I constantly strive to be better. Learning when good is good enough isn't an easy task for a perfectionist.  |
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thats the issue how hard do you think people have to search to find self worth after they've been through something like that i mean its easier said then done even without self esteem issues in your way
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thats the issue how hard do you think people have to search to find self worth after they've been through something like that i mean its easier said then done even without self esteem issues in your way Everything's easier said than done! It's not easy...I don't think anybody here has said it will be a quick fix or a walk in the park. I talk from experience. I've been abused. I've felt worthless because I allowed myself to remain in a situation in which the man made me feel like that. When I finally grew a pair and looked in the mirror and said "He's wrong. I'm not worthless!" is the day I got my life back. It's really that easy, but way more difficult than that first step. It takes constant convincing until it doesn't anymore. You have to replace the negatives with positives and permanent with temporary. You shouldn't be saying "I failed my exam. I'm so friggen stupid." You should be saying "Dang, I shoulda studied a little more. I'm smarter than an F." I sympathize with your past pains but to get upset because people are saying only you can change your self esteem seems a little counterproductive to the whole trying to gain self esteem thing. Not trying to rile you up any further, just stating what I've observed so far in this thread. I wish you peace within someday.
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thank you very much miss wright but as i keep saying ive come to terms with my situation i might not be entirely happy with myself but who is ive been trying to get across that its not as simple for some people to forgive and forget our problems shape us and help us become who we are as a person all im trying to say is that nobody should have extra problems thrust upon them they should be able to live fulfilled and genuinely happy lives
 i am very happy to see that so many people are sensitive enough to try to help me even tho i personally dont need it but alot of other people do if only everyone showed that sort of sensitivity to the people who need it then the world would most definitely be a better place for everyone
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here is my thought....I'm pretty strong (after many years of working on it) but after enough beat down, it can bring the self esteem down. But I am responsible for either staying down or picking myself up.
Just like the positive things can help boost your self esteem, the negative can bring it down a bit...especially if you are being beat down by it. I believe that I make get knocked down at times, but it's up to me to get back up and keep going. yes or no???? |
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true but wouldnt it be much easier to get back up if there was someone there willing to give you a hand?
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true but wouldnt it be much easier to get back up if there was someone there willing to give you a hand? probably, but someone might not be around so it's best to rely on myself. 
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haha yea i totally agree the only person you can ever truly count on is yourself but its good to get a helping hand every now and then
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The power is yours, take responsibility. this is law You are wise. it's just an act because deep inside everyone is afraid of being inferior theres nothing worse to me then psychological taunting and harrassment id much rather be beaten up atleast that way the pain doesnt last but when they really get into your head that never really goes away especially the consequences of them i still have days where i simply cant look at myself cant eat and constantly work out till i can barely stand i've spent a good portion of my life not being good enough and knowing that at the very least i am physically inferior. i'm a dude who is 5'4" due to having to take tons of steroid filled asthma medicine as a kid. i only am alive because of modern medicine. and it's not just that, no it's more than knowing that i'd never be the best at a lot of things that younger people value. no, i was also never the most popular. often got picked on and still get blown off by women all the time. you know what i gathered from that? well, i accepted that i am a apparently a weaker portion of the gene pool and that's alright. but about the bullying and such, and all the friends i've lost due to small bs. the only person's opinion that truly matters is my own. if they don't agree with me, well then maybe i do need to assess my perspective. but that doesn't make me any less of an awesome person. i am me, i'm what i can be. take it or leave it, leave it if you wish a loss /rant |
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