peeking in

another one of the many threads that make me go hmmmmmmmmmmm

Yes I did say MEN...I didn't say ALL men. It was a open, wanted input on how to decifier the code of men. Thought ppl would be willing to give me insight, since I had been in the dating scene since I was in the seventh grade. I was not attacking men, was only asking for help....not to berate ego or mess with anyones testostrone. I am human and was looking for advise not critism or cruel quotes. Thanks to all the wonderful help you have all been next time don't help... But thank you to the ones who really did give a true response and not a self hating statement!

As you state....I said men...NOT ALL MEN!!! Dang I wish ppl could read!

People can read.

I'm getting that the general consensus is that your OP was poorly written and generalized. Placing the word "some" before the word "men" is imperative, as well as clearly explaining you don't "put out" in the OP... well. Hindsight is 20/20, yes?

Write for the reader.... no matter if it makes sense to you.

Just saying....

The thing is, if a guy made a post that read something like "Why are women so....." - you would assume that the guy meant all women, in all likelihood.

When I read the OP, I thought it was directed at all men, and I think that's what everyone else thought, too.

That's funny, as there's a lot of guys out there who're tired of hooking up with flaky drama-queens with no clue as to what they want from their lives let alone their relationships. And -to add insult to injury- they also gotta be rude disrespectful about it, too.

Dang, I wish you could, too. The first paragraph on my post reads as follows:



So, what's YOUR excuse?

Is it ok if I'm rude, as long as I'm not disrespectful? *grins*

Can I chime in? Speaking "only" for myself. This is a great site to meet people and make friends. There are other sites if your just looking for a hook up. If you run into one of those guys who are just looking for a fling steer them elsewhere. I wouldn't mind a quick hook up ;-) But right now in my life I am just looking to make friends to do something other than go to the local casino and waste my time & money. If something happens down the road...AWESOME!!!! I enjoy the topics,keep 'em rollin'!!!

I don't blame you, it's not asking for much is it? Every now & then one of us honest guys are having to meet a wall that a lady has had to put up to be careful because of that sorta thing.

I have met some nice mean they are just married or gay! I keep hoping I do find one of those men out there! Thank you for your response and good luck on your search!

Dont give up we are out here still searching for special women with old fashioned values, class, and finese.

Its unfortunate that most people classify sex as just 'a given' because they are dating. Sure who doesnt like a good romp in the hay or between the sheets every know and again? That isnt what this about..gatkinson feels betrayed by men in general I think because she hasnt come across the right one yet. Keep going girl you will find one that will treat you the way you deserve like a princess and not a tramp.

Dont give up we are out here still searching for special women with old fashioned values, class, and finese.

Its unfortunate that most people classify sex as just 'a given' because they are dating. Sure who doesnt like a good romp in the hay or between the sheets every know and again? That isnt what this about..gatkinson feels betrayed by men in general I think because she hasnt come across the right one yet. Keep going girl you will find one that will treat you the way you deserve like a princess and not a tramp.


there is good and bad in both sexes.

I think you are RIGHT.... thank you for a honest response... I wish you luck in finding what you are searching for!!!

You got a lot of interesting replies, and the usual "mass defensive" "hey, we're not all like that!" from the guys. Point is, guys and gals think different. It doesn't mean you can't have what you want, but you have to realize that men think on a physical level primarily and women on the emotional. To alot of men, physical IS emotional in a sense, because that's the way their brain works. Are there a bunch of low lifes out there that will use you if you let them? Yes. But understand that we think on a diffent level, and physical contact with us works the way emotional contact does for you in many ways. I know most people don't put much stock in astrology, but I've found that about 90% of the time it's dead on with personalities. I don't read the daily horoscope and plan my day by it...I don't believe in fate. You make your own fate and the road you walk is the one you choose. But I've met enough people to know that when you are born had some direct impact on how you act and relate to and with other people. There are too many statistical reports in the dating and marriage psychology fields to back it up to laugh at it. I'm a Scorpio...married a Gemini first. She gave me two great boys...then when they were 3 and 4 years old she left. Just got tired of the "mom" and "wife" thing. Had I known before that Scorpios have the highest divorce rate with Gemini's and why that is so I just might have reconsidered my choice before hand. Second time around I married a Virgo...no sense of responsibility, horrible house keeper, won't cook, lost her job and wouldn't find another. Again, not a first choice for Scorpios but I didn't know then, but I do now. Take it for what it's worth...do a little research on the person. Not everyone is exactly like what they're sign says they are. Some people learn to curb bad traits, but for the most part...you are "when" you were born.

why can't women be honest about what they're looking for???

You know I have problem with some men also and I am a very good woman. I have stated before some men don't want to be with me, but they show will run behind a female that don't have respect for theirself. I guess when we stop looking that right man will come along. I understand where you coming from, there are some men out there that like to play games. Some of them think you are weak.

To be honest, I have found there is much more than honesty that people look for. There are different degrees to trust, and to be honest and open from the start scares people, some may think its not genuine. I am not perfect, nor would I ever claim to be or want to be. But thats what it seems some people look for. I am no model, and it again seems that some people prefer the models over being genuine. Because the way society has become, unfortunately people are usually cautious of other motives. I personally dont believe in one nighters, that to me is a waste of time. Getting to know someone with good conversations over time and building a friendship first is more important. So when you say men as a general statement you may want to reconsider. Try and spend some time to get to know someone. Relationships are a process.

So far I've been lied to by all on the internet. To many married ones even about age. Now I have made some good friends on this site with men but they really seem not to want much more. And there more honest with you. But a lot of wolves out there. Sad when they say friendship but only take from the relationship. I guess we all seach till we find that one we click with.