I think everyone has been cheated on one time or another in their life. I have been. But I have always thought they were cheating themself. No I don't think I am all that perfect but I am a damn sight better than to deserve that kind of juvinile, selfish, cowardly, abusive bs.

Did I randomly sleep with some in revenge sex? No. I am with someone because I want to be with someone not to spite some dirtbag that isn't worth the sweat on my backside.

What did I do?

First I cried for what I had put in for nothing. I deserve to feel loss like anyone cheated out even one minute of their life.

Then I got down on my knees and asked for the help I knew I was going to need to get through.
I really wondered sometimes I was just meant to suffer and I would never find anything that was good in my life but then some little wonder would come to my attention. A winter flower. A favor I never thought was going to come back to me. Someone not showing up and getting some extra hours to pay bills. Catching a favorite song on the radio.

Sometimes it was scary as hell wondering if doing the right thing. Being single in a couples world is tough. Worrying if I was going to be able to survive. Keep a roof over my head my kids cared for. But it seemed like everytime even if it was by the skin of my teeth I got through and got stronger and smarter.

I looked around and paid attention to the people that seemed to be doing well. There were some consistent things absent in their lives; booze, brand new cars, fad clothes, an fun jobs but they thrived.

I stopped looking for the easy way to do things and focused on not putting my own neck on the chopping block as often. I put a stop to having kids I couldn't afford and trying to help family that never quite acted like family. I started taking my time and watching how people treated me over more than a quick flush of lust.

I am not going to say I did it alone. Sometimes it was friends that helped; sometimes total strangers. You have to be nice to people and thank people for helping even when it just sounds like self grandizeing. Once in a while the things that seemed like just another kick in the head at the time later turned out to be opportunities.

Eventually the pain subsided and I realized I had no limited well from which to draw love from and started opening up mine again. Time doesn't make you forget but how you percieve the experience will change.

Someday this won't seem like and abandonment but more like and opportunity to bring the next part of your life ALIVE with a gloryious delight!

wow....thank you all

She doesn't sound like someone you can trust, so you would be better off just moving on. I know that is easier said than done. My ex-fiance, with whom I just broke up with, did not sleep with his ex, but he spent every evening helping her fix up her church, then started going to church with her. He then had the nerve to tell me, since he was doing anything wrong, that I didn't have any reason to be upset that he wanted to spend all his time with her, instead of spending some of it with me. Don't trust her.

I had a long distance relationship with a girl for over 3 years and was totally in love with her.She had also met another man while on her vacation to France around the same time she met me.We wrote e-mails 5 days a week and talked on the phone a average of 4 hours on Sundays.She always said she loved me,and would write and do sweet things for me but would talk about this guy from France from time to time and say how wonderful he was.As time went on we were getting more serious and I was hinting on marraige.One day she told me she never loved me and was never in love with me and was always in love with that jerk off from France and planned to marry him.

Sad to say I racked up thosands of dollars in debt flying to her country and me flying her to mine and all the other things.I have not talked to her in 6 years and I am still paying off those credit card bills.To this day I have a hard time trusting/dating women and have not had a girlfriend for 5 years.

Yes. When I was 17, my gf for more than 2 years cheated on me. That was a bit messed up, to say the least, but I got over it real quick by having sex with her best friend. So all worked out pretty good..

I have been living with my now ex-boyfriend for the past 3 years. I recently disocvered he has been using the internet date sites to meet women in this area. I just found out he is having an affair. When I confronted him, he lied. I knew he was being dishonest after reading his emails. I felt bad for snooping but something was telling me he wasn't being honest with me. After 3 years of being his house *****, I decided to break it off. Last night, I paraded around in front of him nude. Even though he is with this new girl, I seduced him into cheating on her with me. When he told me he felt bad about it this morning, I told him I didn't care because I got what I wanted. We are both looking to see other people and we are still living together until the lease is up on our apartment. I would never take him back after he has continuously lied to me. I do have to be civil because we still live together, but I could never trust him fully again.

Take it from one who knows, if you forgive them, you will find them cheating again. It took a few times before I realized that. So I don't recommend second chances anymore.

I have not been cheated on that I am aware. Thats not to say that it never happened because people generally go to great lengths to conceal this from their significant other. How I have avoided infidelity in the past is simply making it very clear from the start of the relationship that if either of us should meet someone else or decide to pursue another, then we need to break it off BEFORE this interaction becomes physical.

That leaves an out.

As a rule, it seems to work. People are more likely to cheat when they feel trapped or like they can not confront their lover.

I have been cheated on. My husband (waiting for divorce to be finalised) has a new baby with his affair, they have been living together for a year now.

Im not going to bother forgiving him, and I have long forgotten him. It's not worth my time to think about him and at the time, I was more furious at the fool he made of me than anything.

yes,no,no, and I got over it...

I've been cheated on in just about every relationship I've had.

I cheated once, at age 20. Never again, after I saw what it did and the hurt it caused. To him and to me.

yes about 12 yrs ago i moved on.... its only the cheaters fault for it was their actions and no one elses..

wow guys I really can not believe how many people are sharing...

I feel much better knowing other people have had similair experiences...

Still unsure about what to do, however the plot has turned a little "Springerish" as I talked to Ms Cheater last night and she had the nerve to pull the I might be pregnant card. Of course she says it's mine and it very well could be.

She is most probably lying but I think she realizes that she does not want to lose what we had....

LOL life sucks balls

Yes, Gwen & I let our quest for gold, mess oue lives up.

We both cheated.

When it all exploded, we got help. Alone first & then couples therapy. Realized where we had gone wrong, started really talking again & again started WORKING at our relationship. Something I believe many of us forget; anything GOOD takes work, EVERYDAY.

If you BOTH really want things to work,GET HELP.
The pain can be worth it, One of the last things she said to me, "I have & will always love you."

4 hrs later, she was dead. 11+yrs & I still miss her as much as the first day.

Is your lady worth that kind of pain & committment? If so for both, you can patch it up.

Good Luck & Hope it works, HOW YOU BOTH WANT.

In my short years of dating, I've had 4 boyfriends.
Longest relationship being 7 months. Why, you ask?
Because guys my age, and a little older are immature,
sex thriving, cheating bastards. Get my drift?
3 of those boyfriends cheated on me, 1 with his ex.
1 with 3 other girls and the other with my best friend.
The other boyfriend, went out with me for 3 weeks,
and then said, "oh I just wanted you for the sex."


Yeah, not cool. Now, because of this, I've lost
ALOT if not all respect for guys. Guys need to
start thinking about their heart and brain and
not with the other head.


That's the reality of it.

Hmmmmmm....so tell us how you really feel about men.

Im going to point something out here. Submissive males are FAR less likely to cheat. Im saying if you are an assertive female by nature, it works out nicely.

Believe me, I have you all beat.....way too much to put down.......bad enough when your own therapist starts crying..........

My advice: NEVER stay with a CHEATER, NEVER stay with a LIAR UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. Wasted life on a worthless person.

For those of you THINKING about cheating....Leave your spouse before you cheat. Why screw up an innocent person's life?

You cannot have your cake and eat it too.

Ive been cheated on before, sucks. But im one to say i never cheated! I like to rub it in their face because it makes them feel like ****. mwahaha

When someone TRULY loves another, they wouldn't even think of cheating on them - no matter what. Even when times are tough, or when disagreements happen from time to time (those are part of life)...

I have been lucky enough to experience what the best kind of love should be like - and it really isn't capable of breaking your heart, making you cry from being hurt by them, and never ever sharing your body with another.

When it's "love" there is no chance of that happening...

It's hard to realize that I'm sure; but isn't it better to move on and prepare yourself for the right kind of love, than to hold on to one that's already damaged?