How ironic. :\

Forgiveness is a reflex for me. Nothing is so horrible that it can't be forgiven as far as I'm concerned. If you don't forgive, then you can't be healed.

That does not mean that I will leave the door open for further offenses, however. yours in Chaos, Scarlett

Just this morning (Friday 3 Oct 2008) a 21-year-old man I met more than a year ago on another site sent me an email soliciting a (repeat) session of physical affection. He's a very affectionate, industrious, handsome, non-drug-abusing fellow...

I know I'm not really his type, though we make good friends who communicate well. The reason I met him in the first place was because his girlfriend (who he truly loved) had broken up with him in a very cruel manner. I spent a good deal of time just talking to him about how bad the whole thing was for him.

I know lots of good (not "nice") men who are ready, willing, and able to give a woman their hearts. They end up talking to me, and sometimes more than talking.

What's up with that sh!t, anyway? I'm not cheating, or helping someone to cheat; I'm helping someone to cope with awful damage that was inflicted BECAUSE he opened his heart to someone else, and let himself love that person and be used by her. He's tough, smart, really good-looking, able to make a living, and available--and he's spending his Friday night asking me what I'm up to.

What is wrong with this picture...? yours in Chaos, Scarlett

Happy birthday! :D

Please feel free to stop by my topic on the "50 and older" board to let us all know what you plan to do with the next 50 years of your life! yours in Chaos, Scarlett

I've lived in the same house with three men before, not just once but twice. There was no "playing" involved, except perhaps on the next door neighbor's part...

Well... *cough* I don't really know you. No offense.

I was on the phone with my boyfriend for a couple of hours, and now am (making some extra $$$ by) working. yours in Chaos, Scarlett

Wait until someone you've blocked on one site follows you over to another site and starts hassling you there. Then when you block him on that site he makes another account and starts hassling you with that account.

That's like the total experience!

I try not to clutter my mind with such considerations. If I'm being charged by a rabid dog, I'm going to shoot it; that doesn't mean I hate dogs or consider them "evil". I don't consider rabid dogs "evil".

If the dog is leaving me alone, I don't necessarily consider it "good". If the dog is being cute and friendly, I don't necessarily consider it "good". It's just a dog.

To make a decision between "two evil things" or "two good things" is over-cogitation, in my opinion. One would have to be holding in one's mind already a preconceived idea of what constitutes "good" or "evil", instead of seeing the situation merely for what it is.



None of the above, except perhaps the "feel it in your bones" part. I tend to pity those who have to stop and think before deciding whether they are happy or unhappy.

I hope this was helpful. yours in Chaos, Scarlett

My account --> Settings --> Turn on stealth mode.

You get "HTML guilt trip" warnings after that: "ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO DO THIS???!!! YOU KNOW THAT PEOPLE WON'T BE ABLE TO SEE YOU NOW??? I MEAN, ARE YOU REALLY SURE???" (and so on)

yours in Chaos, Scarlett

Nice to meet you! :)

Oh... well I can certainly understand why people would find that so inflammatory, then!

I never did get to find out what a "dugger" was...

I don't care either way. But then again, I've known so many people who create fake profiles on social sites you wouldn't believe it.

Years ago I had a few extra dollars and thought I would check out eHarmony. I did not post any pictures of myself. All these guys would message me JUST to tell me that it made me seem "dishonest" because they couldn't see what I looked like before they decided whether to invest their oh-so-valuable time and effort into getting to know me. (Eharmony, in case you don't know, costs money to join and they SUPPOSEDLY match you with people you're compatible with. So I figured the best way to tell if the site worked or not was to go by strength of profile info alone, and screw the pics, right?)

So I thought that was interesting.

I'm not gonna go into what started to happen once I started posting pics of myself on other sites; it would take too long.

Just to give you some perspective, though: This one girl I met on another site that me and my current boyfriend both belong to was totally hitting on both of us. I got to know her pretty well. She sent me pictures of herself that in no way resembled the pictures she had posted on the site, which were obviously of other people. I made sure that the pics she sent me were of her by asking the occasional guileles question during our IM conversations.

She sent my boyfriend pictures that were NOT of her. (I guess she thought that he and I never talk to each other, or something...? It's weird how people take this whole "war between the sexes" thing TOTALLY FOR GRANTED.)

I noticed that Helmut was spending a lot of time talking to her on Yahoo. Meanwhile she was getting weirder and weirder with me, being alternately very antagonistic and then switching back to lovey-dovey.

Finally I asked Helmut if he had given her any personal info; he said he had given her his phone number, but that she had never called him. I started to wonder what was going on and did some investigating--it turned out that this nice lady (she was not the age or the size that she advertised herself as being) was getting people's private info by pretending to be a "hot horny chick" online and selling it to another party.

When I discovered this, I sent her picture to Helmut and said, "This is what this girl really looks like. Get your phone number changed NOW." (It was enjoyable to see how embarrassed he was, but that's neither here nor there.)

Anyway, regardless of your attitude toward how you or anybody else represents him or herself online, there is always going to seem like a majority of people who consider you in the wrong.

I hope this was helpful! yours in Chaos, Scarlett

Nice to meet you. :)

A nation pretty much has to be sheep, doesn't it? The sheep always have to outnumber the wolves, regardless of what type of animal you're actually talking about. Otherwise the wolves would run out of food in a big hurry.

You are so right! It IS stupid that people under 21 can't drink, dammit! I mean, if I want to buy booze for all my under-21 friends, I have to go through SO MUCH TROUBLE!

You're talking about three years' difference in age--erm... how could this lady even TELL that you were older than your date..? Were you telling people at adjacent tables, or something...?

In the example given ("yes if I see some a hole hitting a women me hitting him and then taking him out side and runnig his head into his car window") the logic is faulty; "hitting a women[sic]" constitutes only one "wrong" action committed by another person, in this case, the "hole". You hitting him is the first "wrong" on your part, and then you "running his head into a car window" is the second "wrong" on your part, but there is no "right" result that justifies what is essentially three "wrong" actions, especially if the "hole" happens to be carrying a gun, or the police officer that is summoned to the scene does not buy into your justification for attacking another person. (Not that I don't enjoy violence! I'm just sayin.)

In any case, the statement "two wrongs do not equal a right" is extremely vague; it's usually employed by moralistic types to scold people who attempt to justify their self-centered actions in terms of conventional morality. I hope this was helpful. yours in Chaos, Scarlett

Thanks for the info. Of course, this is all assuming that someone would consider you worth having in the first place. xoxo

Hello! :)