Why don't you pick on your ugly face, everyone makes mistakes, who the hell are you to judge?

Better then being bald

Just another way to spend your money, and to start discusion like this

ya know.. if love get you down, the next best thing is to tell yourself " i'll drink to that" then it starts all over again,Lol

Its even worse when they don't know what the hell Sweet Tea is, they hand you a glass of non sweetend tea and you take this big nasty gulp and almost puke everything up and then they look at you stupid when you want grits, and use slan terms like "Well, were having nice weather, and sodas Texas" lol

what i mean to say is that if you pick on your self and love you for you, then you'll be comfortable in your own skin, so its either you lauph or you freaking cry, and who the hell whats to cry.. take a damn drink

maybe even ozzy may be there... funny cause ozzy is the last person you would see at a mormon... what the hell is that anyways?

People Really Said These Things In Court
Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July fifteenth.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.

Q: This myasthenia gravis - does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?

Q: All your responses must be oral, okay? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.

Q: How old is your son - the one living with you.
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years.

Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?
A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.

Q: Sir, what is your IQ?
A: Well, I can see pretty well, I think.

Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in the voodoo occult?
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.

Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?

Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?

Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?
Q: Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war?

Q: Did he kill you?

Q: How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision?

Q: You were there until the time you left, is that true?

Q: How many times have you committed suicide?

Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?

Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?

Q: You say the stairs went down to the basement?
A: Yes.
Q: And these stairs, did they go up also?

Q: Mr. Slattery, you went on a rather elaborate honeymoon, didn't you?
A: I went to Europe, sir.
Q: And you took your new wife?

Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?

Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, or a female?

Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy

1. You stomp your toe
2. Get stoped by every red light on the way to work
3. Get a flatt tire and don't have a spare
4. Forget your wallet at the house

Be carful with what you do you only have one life to live so live it well and rock it out!

my dad wasn't the best man in the world, but i did listen to what he had to say.. and my reason is is that i don't want to catch any thing

I will never forget this saying, My dad told me this when i was fifteen..." Guys need a place...Girls need a reason" what do yall have to say about that?

not if they have really bad morning breath, makes you want to knock them out!!

sure hope he is okay

I am personally not a morning person. When somebody says Good morning all i have to say to that is what the hell is so good about it.

I finish crap other people start!!

I would like to quote Ron White by saying... When life gives you lemons, find some body whose life is giving them vodka and have a freaking party!!!

That is damn good, it could bring a tear to a glass eye

better then alot of others dude, it can bring a tear to a glass eye cause its so true

The point is to be funny, that was soooo corny, i feel for ya man

maybe the doctor should have told him to lay off the booze