Read below if you want a few more $$$ from the IRS Subject: Special One
time tax credit on 2006 tax return
verified at .....

http://www.snopes.com/business/taxes/excise.asp



When it comes time to prepare and file your 2006 tax return, make sure
you don't overlook the "federal excise tax refund credit." You claim the
credit on line 71 of your form 1040. A similar line will be available if
you file the short form 1040A. If you have family or friends who no
longer file a tax return AND they have their own land phone in their
home and have been paying a phone bill for years, make sure they know
about this form 1040EZ-T.

What is this all about? Well the federal excise tax has been charged to
you on your phone bill for years. It is an old tax that was assessed on
your toll calls based on how far the call was being made and how much
time you talked on that call. When phone companies began to offer flat
fee phone service, challenges to the excise tax ended up in federal
courts in several districts of the country. The challenges pointed out
that flat fee/rate phone service had nothing to do with the distance and
the length of the phone call. Therefore, the excise tax should/could not
be assessed.

The IRS has now conceded this argument. Phone companies have been given
notice to stop assessing the federal excise tax as of Aug 30, 2006. You
will most likely see the tax on your September cutoff statement, but it
should NOT be on your October bill.

But the challengers of the old law also demanded restitution. So the IRS
has announced that a one time credit will be available when you and I
file our 2006 tax return as I explained above. However, the IRS also
established limits on how BIG a credit you can get Here's how it works.

If you file your return as a single person with just you as a dependent,
you get to claim a $30 credit on line 71 of your 1040.

If you file with a child or a parent as your dependent, you claim $40.

If you file your return as a married couple with no children ,you claim
$40.

If you file as married with children, you claim $50 if one child, $60 if
two children.

In all cases, the most you get to claim is $60 - UNLESS you have all
your phone bills starting AFTER Feb 28, 2003 through July 31, 2006 (do
not use any bills starting Aug 1, 2006.), then you can add up the ACTUAL
TAX AS IT APPEARS ON YOUR BILLS AND CLAIM THAT FOR A CREDIT.

Now if you have your actual phone bills and come up with an ACTUAL TAX
AMOUNT, you cannot use line 71 on your tax return. You have to complete
a special form number 8913 and attach it to your tax return.

Individuals using the special from 1040EZ-T will have to attach this
form 8913 also.

One final point - this credit is a refundable credit. That means you get
this money, no matter how your tax return works out. If you would end up
owing the IRS a balance, the refund will reduce that balance you owe. If
you end up getting a refund, the credit will be added and you get a
bigger refund by that $30 to $60, depending on how many dependents are
on your return.

Feel free to pass this on or make copies for family and friends who
don't have computers.

In case you wanted to wish your neighbor Happy New Year, or get in touch
with your heritage, here are a few alternative ways to say it:
Onnellista Uutta Vuotta - Finnish
Bonne Annee - French
Prosit Neujahr - German
Bliain nua fe mhaise dhuit - Irish
Felice anno nuovo - Italian
Szczesliwego Nowego Roku - Polish
Feliz Ano Nuevo - Spanish
Gott nytt år - Swedish

1. Each Player shall furnish his own equipment for play -- normally one
club and two balls.

2. Play on a course must be approved by the owner of the hole.

3. Unlike outdoor golf, the object is to get the club in the hole and
keep the balls out of the hole.

4. For most effective play, the club should have a firm shaft. Course
owners are permitted to check shaft stiffness before play begins.

5. Course owners reserve the right to restrict the length of the club to
avoid damage to the hole.

6. The object of the game is to take as many strokes an necessary until
the course owner is satisfied that the play is complete. Failure to do
so may result in being denied permission to play the course again.

7. It is considered bad form to begin playing the hole immediately upon
arrival at the course. The experienced player will normally take time to
admire the entire course, with special attention to the well-formed
bunkers.

8. Players are cautioned not to mention other courses they have played
or are currently playing to the owner of the course being played. Upset
course owners have been known to damage a player's equipment for this
reason.

9. Players are encouraged to have proper rain gear along, just in case.

10. Players should assure themselves that their match has been properly
scheduled, particularly when a new course is being played for the first
time. Previous players have been known to become irate if they discover
someone else playing what they consider to be a private course.

11. Players should not assume a course is in shape for play at all
times.Some players may be embarrassed if they find the course to be
temporarily under repair. Players are advised to be extremely tactful in
this situtation; More advanced players will find alternative means of
play when this is the case.

12. Players are advised to obtain the course owner's permission before
attempting to play the back nine.

13. Slow play is encouraged, however, players should be prepared to
proceed at a quicker pace, at least temporarily, at the course owner's
request.

14. It is considered outstanding performance, time permitting, to play
the same hole several times in one match.

APPLES & WINE...

Women are like apples on trees.
The best ones are at the top of the tree.
Most men don't want to reach for the good ones
because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they sometimes take the apples from the ground that aren't as
good, but easy.
The apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing.
They just have to wait for the right man to come along,
the one who is brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.


Now Men ...
Men are like a fine wine.
They begin as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the **** out of them
until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.

Yeah that one did but I was on the "General" for the Norad one which I
figured more people with kids would see it and forgot to change sections
LOL

1. Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?

2. Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Kings Disoriented Are

3. Dementia --- I Think I'll be Home for Christmas

4. Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me

5. Manic --- Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets
and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Busses and Trucks and
Trees

and.....

6. Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Town to Get Me

7. Depression --- Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire

8. Borderline Depression --- You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry,
I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why

9. Attention Deficit Disorder --- Silent night, Holy oooh look at the
froggy - can I have a chocolate, why is France so far away?

10. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder --Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,Jingle
Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle
Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle
Bells, Jingle,Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle
Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle
Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle
Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle
Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Jingle

but it's still funny.

http://www.flurl.com/uploaded/Cops_Santa_24024.html

Log on and let them see where Santa is right now ! !

http://www.noradsanta.com/index.php

Greeley is about 50 miles N of Denver and we usually have less "weather"
than the Denver area, something to do with how the mountains affect the
jet stream.

They told me Greeley was in the "banana belt" too and snows like this
are rare here.

Eastern Colorado needed it really bad too Morena, they've been under
severe drought conditions for several years.

Hey if I couldn't handle it at least the mortician wouldn't have to
waste time putting a smile on my face now would he?

I dunno, ya think the 2 of ya tag teaming me would be enuf ? LOL I'm
still waitin to meet my match, it might take sisters or sumthin! ;)

ya'll would crap yourselves if I showed up on your doorstep with a
cooler full now wouldn't ya? :P
Hell Morena has her filters set so she don't even have to talk to an old
fart like me. Tried to message her a while back about one of her posts
and was told by the system I "didn't meet her criteria" to message her
LOL

All I can say is I was told a couple of months ago someone had never met
their match. Now they tell me they won't be saying that any more ;)

It's not supposed to even get NEAR 40 until at least Weds so I'm pretty
sure we're having a white Christmas here. Ya know it'd be a load easier
if any of ya wanted to come visit than for me to deliver the stuff!

BUMMER !! :((

What part of Co MtGuy? Sheesh from what I heard it pretty much killed
all 4 corners of the state!
CCP, sounds good (More than good and a little kinky which is fine by me)
but I think ya might have a little trouble convincing her ;)

Well I might offer personal delivery but that'd probably get me in hot
water! ;) LOL

you're not the only one who's told me that CCP but there's several
million folks who didn't care for this storm at all!