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Community > Posts By > I_love_bluegrass
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I am from the USA, and men and woman here are totally different as far as looking for friendship, companionship, relationships! Here in the USA we seem to be totally looking for a woman or a man, judged on age and looks! Visual is very important to us Americans! I have noticed that woman in Asia, especially from the Philippines seem to look at age as just a number, and look beyond the surface, and look for a person for their inner self as well! Just different cultures I guess!...what do you think, am I right? Isn't that where a lot of "mail-order brides" come from? I'm sure they are not as picky about a LOT of things....those women that just want to move to the US and get their green card, eh? 
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Topic:
Honesty
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Why do the majority of women here lie about their names and locations? Are they seriously trying to hide or date? If hide,why are they here? Playing silly little games huh? What a waste if lives. I don't think any of the *real* women do that..just the fakes and so forth. I saw a guy the other day..his profile stated: "59 year old man from United State, United States" Dude, could you be any MORE vague???? |
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Topic:
SITE WENT DOWN~~~
Edited by
I_love_bluegrass
on
Fri 11/22/19 05:57 PM
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I clicked on the link I was sent in the e-mail...I was suspicious, because I got a "Redirecting" message, and shut that tab..
All those scams we read about where someone sends a fake e-mail pretending to be someone's bank... So, I went to Mingle itself and tried to sign in, and went through the reset *that*w ay.. |
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Edited by
I_love_bluegrass
on
Fri 11/22/19 09:22 AM
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Really? What kind of response are women wanting? Those one liners were real?! How about reading the woman's profile, and seeing something that you are also interested in, commenting on THAT. Like..say..you see she is interested in vintage electronics (or whatever), and you are also....start a chat about that.. |
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Sure why not age is only something the two involved should be concerned about.. As long as it don't bother either partner it is no one else's business who one dates.. THAT ^ is the key.... *IF* both are on the same page with that.. But people who push people to date someone much younger/ older than them, just because *they* think you should/ you are missing out...that is wrong, and disrespectful. I don't care what anyone else does WRT age (although I may not understand it, but..whatever)...but *I* know what I want, prefer, and need...and it's not someone young enough to be my own biological child, or old enough to be my dad... |
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Lack of photo and specific information. Without an updated photo of the actual person nor synopsis about themselves and what they're looking for in a relationship, there's no way of knowing the actual person. I would almost have to hire a swami sooth-sayer from the East to divine the answers before even knowing the questions. The main thing is this: No portrait/picture, no synopsis/info = No Date. And some of the ladies to seemingly take an interest in me, are a bit too young for me (nearly 40 years my junior). I tell ya', we're living in strange times nowadays... Oh, but *see*? You "learn more about someone by talking to them".. And "everyone liars on these things" And "Sure, i could write a bunch of things on my profile I think you'd want to hear..but, I'd rather talk to you in person"... Let's clarify that, shall we? 1. Why would I POSSIBLY have *nay* interest in starting a chat with someone who I haven't the first clue if we have anything at all in common....or what they look like... My time is valuable...I am not interested in starting a chat with dozens of dudes with blank profiles on the *outside*, random chance we may have stuff in common. 2. No, NOT everyone, homie. *I* do not liar....and, if you think everyone lies...I wonder if that is not projection on your part, eh? 3. What THAT one actually means is..."I don;t want to write anything on my profile that may be off-putting to you..or might run you off... I'd rather talk in person, feel you out, so I can pretend to be what you want...." |
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Topic:
Cats - declawing
Edited by
I_love_bluegrass
on
Thu 11/07/19 09:21 AM
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bluegrass, I'm not really sure what you are trying to say? You can decide if you want your tubes tied. Does a cat feel a lot of pain when they are declawed? People have to consider that. "Does a cat feel pain if declawed"? Do they feel a lot of pain when they are spayed? So, they shouldn't be spayed then? (using your statement) If they are an inside cat, never get outside among other cats, why bother with spaying..it isn't realy necessary, eh? The answer to both is most likely, but that is what the vet gives pain meds to them for.. If you ever had you appendix out, or a hysterectomy..I'm sure the day after and for a couple days there's residual pain as one recuperates. Mt *point* was that I have had a cat that was declawed for many years..and, *as* I said..unlike Tictac claims...she has *plenty* of "confidence"...you should see her chase my dog up & down the hall.. My point was *also* (in referncing my tubal ligation) was that, as I *said*...there is a LOT of bad and misleading information out there on the internet regarding various surgeries, procedures, etc.. *I* certainly ran across a lot when I was doing the research for my surgery...and declawing is kind of the same things..there's a LOT of bad, wrong, and misleading information out there.. Notice how you never have people who HAVE declawed cats (meaning, declawed when they got them) speak up about how their cat seems just like any other cat that has claws...no personality issues, no "lacking confidence", none of that stuff.. Only people who are against it. I fostered a few feral cats when I volunteered at the shelter, and let me tell you..*those* cats had WAY more "issues" than any declawed cat i have run across.. Now, if you have read this far,, do not misunderstand me and think i am in any way *promoting* declawing. I am not. But, if someone chooses to go that route, they should have good, factual information available to make an informed decision, not just people's opinions and hysteria... |
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Edited by
I_love_bluegrass
on
Sun 11/03/19 06:08 PM
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It matters if it matters to one of the people.
Just like not everyone likes strawberry ice cream, or opera, or sci-fi movies.. Evereyone is different, and their likes, wants and preferences are all equally valid.. If age *does* matter to someone...don't judge/ shame them.....simply move on to someone for whom that is not an issue.. You're wasting your time trying to convince someone who has tried strawberry ice cream more than several times and knows they don't like it that ~this time~ it'll be diferent because it is YOU offering the strawberry ice cream. That is disrespectful as h*ll... |
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Topic:
casual vs not so casual
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I suppose I am something like most men,I just don't want to go through it all again ,I enjoy being alone most of the time ,doing what I want when I want,I am looking for a lady for a bit of company / support and offer the same ,as for quick hookups the idea disgusts me, But does that answer the OP's question? Women also go through all that, they also suffer, they also lose out incl financially and materially, they're often the ones left with the kids, having to carry both their own pain as well as the kids' and having to keep a normal life together for the kids' sake. Their dreams and hope for the future are also in ruins, and they possibly had to endure a crap sexlife (I think more often than not). Yet... women recover, find their feet and want a new relationship, are able and willing to take the risk of getting hurt again as that's the only way to love. Why can't men do that? I know some do, but what you see and come across is that most don't. All they do is what you see here: biotch at women and blame women. Yes! We are all gold diggers, lie about our age and weight, we are all crazy, just looking to take advantage of men. Yeppers, 90 percent of the men on here do nothing but whine and complain about how they can't get a date or how wonen have ruined their life, just bitter, jaded men, no wonder no one wants them I've been divorced...he was a serial cheater..and *I* didn't "fleece" him.. I took my half.....to do anything else is wrong, and I wouldn't do it... I *still* think that most of the time when men get taken to the cleaners/ fleeced/ wtf-ever that they didn't give consideration/ acknowledge red flags/ issues..for whatever reason..she was hot...the sex was good...it's npt that bad...I can change her...whatever... JMO...yours may vary, and that's OK.. |
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Edited by
I_love_bluegrass
on
Thu 10/24/19 07:30 AM
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No timeline, sorry. But you have control for sure: be(come) a match for such a man, correction, warrior 
You can't attract what you're not a match to. (quite chitty ain't it, haha) 
I had a recent unpleasant exchange with a guy on another site whose whole aim, apparently, was to tear me down, because he (being the Ascended Master I presume) spoke for all men and that my market value wasn't s**t, and when I reminded him I had had TWO long terms with great guys, and am now a widow..he said they were (and I quote) bottom feeders, because no one else would have you".. Oh really? Well, if my late husband and the guy before him were what YOU consider "bottom feeders, then send them *all* my way. (my late husband and the guy before him both had Master degrees, had a wide range of interests, and did volunteer work..etc.) And, if my alternative is dudes like YOU, then no thanks...I'd rather be alone.. I don't need someone to tear me down/ make me feel bad about myself. I sure as h**l wouldn't do that to someone..no one deserves that. |
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There is also the difference in values and attitudes. There is always the desire to learn the values and attitudes of someone you have an interest in. The response of that person says a lot about their values and attitudes. It is best to find those incompatibilities before spending the effort to meet. And, if someonre's values and preferencs are different than yours, then for gods sake..don't criticize them or get rude and tell them how you think they'd be a better person if they'd just..... Unless one is an Ascended Master, one should not presume to tell someone that *they* know better than them how they should conduct their life, how they should act, or behave, or believe. And you (the generic *you*) don't get to get pissy or ugly when they don't take you "advice" with a smile, if they react like any normal person would to an unasked for opinion, especially if that "opinion" is merely teling them how they are wrong..abd if they'd just see/ vhange (to suit you)...blah blah. Attitudes? I don't know how that comes into play unless one is referring to specific subjects or prefernces..and, in that regard..see above. |
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Edited by
I_love_bluegrass
on
Tue 10/22/19 05:03 PM
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It could be that some older men have decreased sexual interest. There's one point that both of you ignored- Does the man Want to get involved with the woman? I'd wager that some men (like me) don't want to. The baggage that comes with a sex partner isn't so appealing. Or, the man sees no appeal in the available women. I came across a few street walkers in my younger days. Never saw one I'd have sex with, even if it was free. (And it wasn't) My ex used to complain about my sexual interest in her. What she never realized, is that when she dyed her hair red, that killed my interest in her. I never dated a red head, never approached one for dating. Red wasn't in my appealing category. Then I end up with one. It became sort of a mexican standoff. To retaliate, I shaved off my mustache. Now it seemed pretty childish, back then, it wasn't. These goofy articles seem to proclaim the true reasons for sexual interest. I say it's time to look at the appeal side of sex. "Or, the man sees no appeal in the available women." Yep.... When a guy looks like my dad did at age 55-65....it's really hard for me to get all tingly about him.. And, so many of the men in my age range look like that... 
Now, my dad was a nice looking guy, but...if they look like that..I just can't.. I'm sure if all the avaibale women looked like you mom...you wouldn't get bonertingles either. I'll agree with you on that one. To a point. That being that my mother was slender all of her life. I see very few older single women, that are slim. (In my area) So it's just easier not to bother. (Cheaper too) I think you misunderstood me.. I meant if a guy or woman looked like you dad or mom... Meaning...it'd be creepy.. I talked with a guy for a while several years ago..actually met him once..but..when he turned his head..at certain angles he looked *just* like my dad... Made it impossible for me to get tingles for him....as it would just have been too weird...I would have felt like I was in bed with my dad.....
Not that my dad was bad looking...but..I think you get my drift... No one wants to roll over and see their dad/ mom.... 
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It could be that some older men have decreased sexual interest. There's one point that both of you ignored- Does the man Want to get involved with the woman? I'd wager that some men (like me) don't want to. The baggage that comes with a sex partner isn't so appealing. Or, the man sees no appeal in the available women. I came across a few street walkers in my younger days. Never saw one I'd have sex with, even if it was free. (And it wasn't) My ex used to complain about my sexual interest in her. What she never realized, is that when she dyed her hair red, that killed my interest in her. I never dated a red head, never approached one for dating. Red wasn't in my appealing category. Then I end up with one. It became sort of a mexican standoff. To retaliate, I shaved off my mustache. Now it seemed pretty childish, back then, it wasn't. These goofy articles seem to proclaim the true reasons for sexual interest. I say it's time to look at the appeal side of sex. "Or, the man sees no appeal in the available women." Yep.... When a guy looks like my dad did at age 55-65....it's really hard for me to get all tingly about him.. And, so many of the men in my age range look like that...
Now, my dad was a nice looking guy, but...if they look like that..I just can't.. I'm sure if all the avaibale women looked like you mom...you wouldn't get bonertingles either. |
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Here you go regarding decreased sexual interest of older men: https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/sexual-health/expert-answers/loss-of-sex-drive/faq-20058237 https://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/features/loss-of-libido-in-men#1 Oh sweetie..you didn;t need to show me that..*I* already knew about that. |
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I do not bash older women but only point out statistical facts and medical research. It is much healthier both physically and mentally to remain sexually active. If you are having difficulty enjoying your sexuality as you age, you need to discuss it with your healthcare provider. There are many ways to change that situation with either medications or psychological intervention. What I do bash are older women who refuse to admit they have a sexual problem and seek medical care. They also seem to think older men also have no interest in sexual activity and will be satisfied with a female companion or housekeeper. As you say, some will be but many others will not be. FYI: there is a significant difference between not getting laid and being incapable of having an erection or orgasm. Getting laid (your words) requires a partner generally preferred to be a female partner!!! Again..you totally ignored my comment about that there ARE older men as well that have little and no interest in sex.... As I said..just because you can't believe that doesn't mean it isn't true. They don't have an interest *not* because they have ED or any other physical problem...they just don't... |
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Edited by
I_love_bluegrass
on
Mon 10/21/19 06:50 AM
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This is why men bring up the subject earlier than you ladies like: To take a closer look at sex and older women, Harder and her colleagues analyzed surveys filled out by 24,305 women, half of whom were 64 or older. The researchers chose to focus on 4,418 women who also filled out a comment section that allowed them to write down their experiences in more detail. Just 22.5% of the women, whose ages ranged from 50 to 75, said they had had intercourse in the preceding month. Lack of an intimate partner was the most common reason women cited, at 34.7%, for giving up sex. Among the 65.3% of women who did have a partner, just 34.5 reported being sexually active in the preceding month. If only 35% who have partners are sexually active, that means I have a 60+% chance of getting involved with a woman unwilling to be sexually active. Poor odds of finding a suitable partner!! I don't need a commitment to have sex with me ever but I do need to hear a positive attitude toward still being sexually active on your part. ref:https://www.msn.com/en-us/health/health-news/sex-less-likely-and-less-satisfying-as-women-hit-older-age/ar-AAEbE6E?li=BBnba9O You really need to get off the woman-bashing trope.. There are plenty of guys who, as they get older have lost interest in sex.. Just because YOU don't believe it or don't perspnally know anyone like that doesn't mean it isn't true... Also, men are less likely to be honest about the fact they aren't getting any...like it's an embaressment if they aren't or something...so, many misrepresemt how active they actually are... I said nothing about leading anyone on. I merely commented on the fact you continually bash older women for having a low or no sex drive.. As I *said*..that happens to older guys as well...but most won't admit it, because..like in high school..they don't want to be seen as the loser guy who can't get laid (when in fact, they have no real interest in it)...but to save face, they act like they do. |
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This is why men bring up the subject earlier than you ladies like: To take a closer look at sex and older women, Harder and her colleagues analyzed surveys filled out by 24,305 women, half of whom were 64 or older. The researchers chose to focus on 4,418 women who also filled out a comment section that allowed them to write down their experiences in more detail. Just 22.5% of the women, whose ages ranged from 50 to 75, said they had had intercourse in the preceding month. Lack of an intimate partner was the most common reason women cited, at 34.7%, for giving up sex. Among the 65.3% of women who did have a partner, just 34.5 reported being sexually active in the preceding month. If only 35% who have partners are sexually active, that means I have a 60+% chance of getting involved with a woman unwilling to be sexually active. Poor odds of finding a suitable partner!! I don't need a commitment to have sex with me ever but I do need to hear a positive attitude toward still being sexually active on your part. ref:https://www.msn.com/en-us/health/health-news/sex-less-likely-and-less-satisfying-as-women-hit-older-age/ar-AAEbE6E?li=BBnba9O You really need to get off the woman-bashing trope.. There are plenty of guys who, as they get older have lost interest in sex.. Just because YOU don't believe it or don't perspnally know anyone like that doesn't mean it isn't true... Also, men are less likely to be honest about the fact they aren't getting any...like it's an embaressment if they aren't or something...so, many misrepresemt how active they actually are... |
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Topic:
Myers briggs
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Hi Paul, Sorry I am an INTJ. Good luck in your search. I am an INTJ as well 
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Same here, nothing worse than a blank profile. It does not attract attention or the curiosity of wanting to look at their profile. Instant turn off. Yes..and then they say "I am an open book...ask me anything.." And then when you *do* start to ask them stuff...you know, to determine if the two of you have *anything* at all in commomn? Then suddently it becomes "this ain' no da*** job interview.." Yes, boo..it kind of is...as I don't know diddly-squat about you, and you were too lazy to write anything on your profile. Or, I see "people lie on heree all the time/ say just what they think women want to hear...I'd rather talk in person.." Honey..maybe YOU would lie on your profile..but most people do not. Also? I have learned that saying that ^ means they want to see what YOUR interests/ prefernces are first..so they can act like those are theirs as well... That's why they put nothing..they don't want you to pass them by because they might have something that for you is a hard dealbreaker listed. |
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Topic:
Drive and smoke
Edited by
I_love_bluegrass
on
Fri 10/18/19 06:44 PM
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