What mistakes did you make on a date?

Share so that others can avoid them.

I'll start off:

I went out on a date with someone I met through a singles ad (do they still have them?). Anyway we met at a restaurant that I've never been to before. I picked it because it was close and I didn't have a car at the time. I had failed to check it out before hand.

The food was good. But in each corner of the seating area, there was a TV. While she was talking, I would get distracted by something on the screen over her left shoulder.

Do I really have to say how wrong that was?

Obviously, it was a last, first date.

I've learned my lesson. If there is a TV on the wall, I'll either have it behind me, to one side of me or sit as far away from it as I can.


Anyone else want to share?

A daughter checks her elderly father into a nice clean nursing home.

A week later she calls her dad and asks him what he thinks about the home, the staff and the treatment.

The Father gives a glowing report on it, "They take good care of us. They feed us good food. They have healthy activities every day. And just before bed time they give us a sleeping pill and the guys get a Viagra."

This news shocks the daughter. So the next day she visits the head nurse and confronts her. "Is it true, that you give my father, at his age a Viagra each night?!!"

"Yes it's true."

"WHY?!!"

"Well, it acts like a kick stand on a bicycle, and keeps them from rolling out of bed."

After a man makes love to his girlfriend, what are the three little words that most terrify him.

















Nope


















They are: "Honey, I'm home!"

I would rather she be a friend before I have sex with her. The Alternative is only having sex with strangers. NO thanks. If I don't have feelings for her (other than lust), it would feel too shallow and unfulfilling for me.

I know this isn't the question the OP set out.

I'm thankful for the ability and desire to see the beauty of creation all around me.

The problem, (in my opinion) is that the writers are running out of ideas.

If they had a new idea, why would they make movies out of TV shows from my childhood?

Green Lantern

Be able to create anything I can imagine... That would be awesome!

Yes on a tow truck I was driving. The belt on the alternator broke.

Especially coming from a man. But for emergencies, you should keep 2 pairs of pantyhose in the trunk of your car.

Reasons: 1) They make a great emergency fan belt, so you can get down the road to the repair shop. 2) As emergency thermal under layer. Last blizzard here (not this weekend) a friend had to walk several blocks to a bus stop. And then wait in the freezing cold for a couple of hours. She said her legs were frozen. I told her that if she had had a pair of pantyhose in her purse it would have saved her a lot of discomfort.

How do I know this? I used to belong to the SCA (medieval dress up and re-enactment group) and those tights (doubled over pantyhose) can keep your legs nice and warm.

Yes guys, it looks un-manly. But so does freezing your n@ts off.

A renown preacher was on his death bed and called two of his church members to attend him as he awaited death. One was an accountant and the other was an IRS agent. He asked them to each sit on either side of his bed. So they did. A look of supreme peace was shown on the preacher's face as he took their hand in his hands. Well they both felt very honored. But then the accountant said, "Thank you for this honor and blessing, but there are other members who are more worthy of this honor. Why did you call on us?"

The preacher sighed and said, "Christ died and went to Heaven, between two thieves... And I thought, if its good enough for the Lord..."

A renown preacher was on his death bed and called two of his church members to attend him as he awaited death. One was an accountant and the other was an IRS agent. He asked them to each sit on either side of his bed. So they did. A look of supreme peace was shown on the preacher's face as he took their hand in his hands. Well they both felt very honored. But then the accountant said, "Thank you for this honor and blessing, but there are other members who are more worthy of this honor. Why did you call on us?"

The preacher sighed and said, "Christ died and went to Heaven, between two thieves... And I thought, if its good enough for the Lord..."

I was made in Japan.

Those problems where before she died.

One more thing to think about everyone... We put her in a mid-priced nursing home. Good staff to patient ratio. It was $6,600.00 a month. The high priced one was $15,000.00 a month.

If they could have saved her... I would have paid any price.

I was told they were "Power Surges!"

Heck, it's only a 30 minute commute, isn't it?

Yes, if you have too much... the spouse may get ideas. Like the money could keep them warmer than you do. And it is hard to sleep with one eye open!

Personally, I like to window shop. But usually I either can't afford it. Or don't need it right now.

But sometimes something I didn't know I wanted, I found out I needed.

For shoes, shirts, pants... Yes.

For body parts? I hope not.

There is a saying, "A smart person learns from their mistakes. A wise person learns from other people's mistakes."

Please be wise and learn from the mistakes I made.

When you find the one that you want to spend the rest of your life with. Get three things on/for each other:

Life insurance... I had it on my life, didn't have it on hers. We didn't think we needed it on her, since everyone knows that the husband on average usually dies 9 years before the wife. And she was healthy as a horse! So get life insurance on each other!! (No I'm not a agent and I don't sell it)

Medical Power Of Attorney... I was her husband, I'm entitled to get that information, right? WRONG! The nursing home would not give me a list of what meds they were feeding her without that Power of Attorney. And she had to sign it. She could barely make a mark. Had to hire a Roving Notary at $50 to $100 per visit.

Then had to get him back to notarize the next thing later.

Financial Power of Attorney... Again I was her husband! I'm entitled to close out her credit card, right? AGAIN WRONG. The bank would not remove her from the accounts and close the credit card (I paid it off before I tried to close it.) without her signature.


If you get those Powers of Attorneys when you are both healthy, most banks will do free notarization. And it is a good safe guard.

This advice works for same sex couples and male/female couples.

PLEASE reduce your heart ache before you have this emotional dark times.

No it isn't. But it is better and more also more frightening. And if you lose them... Much more painful.

"Remember, your car isn't the only thing that can be recalled by it's maker."

He must have needed her more than He thought I needed her.