There is a saying, "A smart person learns from their mistakes. A wise person learns from other people's mistakes."

Please be wise and learn from the mistakes I made.

When you find the one that you want to spend the rest of your life with. Get three things on/for each other:

Life insurance... I had it on my life, didn't have it on hers. We didn't think we needed it on her, since everyone knows that the husband on average usually dies 9 years before the wife. And she was healthy as a horse! So get life insurance on each other!! (No I'm not a agent and I don't sell it)

Medical Power Of Attorney... I was her husband, I'm entitled to get that information, right? WRONG! The nursing home would not give me a list of what meds they were feeding her without that Power of Attorney. And she had to sign it. She could barely make a mark. Had to hire a Roving Notary at $50 to $100 per visit.

Then had to get him back to notarize the next thing later.

Financial Power of Attorney... Again I was her husband! I'm entitled to close out her credit card, right? AGAIN WRONG. The bank would not remove her from the accounts and close the credit card (I paid it off before I tried to close it.) without her signature.


If you get those Powers of Attorneys when you are both healthy, most banks will do free notarization. And it is a good safe guard.

This advice works for same sex couples and male/female couples.

PLEASE reduce your heart ache before you have this emotional dark times.

You are right.

Been ther had to get to the Tshirt.

Even with all that it is still incredibly dificult to loose a spouse and deal with all the people who make it their bussiness to be in yours. Sometimes even years later when they should be focusing on their own lives.

While I do recommend having enough to cover expenses there is nothing that draws out the worst in people like the wiff of money.

There is a saying, "A smart person learns from their mistakes. A wise person learns from other people's mistakes."

Please be wise and learn from the mistakes I made.

When you find the one that you want to spend the rest of your life with. Get three things on/for each other:

Life insurance... I had it on my life, didn't have it on hers. We didn't think we needed it on her, since everyone knows that the husband on average usually dies 9 years before the wife. And she was healthy as a horse! So get life insurance on each other!! (No I'm not a agent and I don't sell it)

Medical Power Of Attorney... I was her husband, I'm entitled to get that information, right? WRONG! The nursing home would not give me a list of what meds they were feeding her without that Power of Attorney. And she had to sign it. She could barely make a mark. Had to hire a Roving Notary at $50 to $100 per visit.

Then had to get him back to notarize the next thing later.

Financial Power of Attorney... Again I was her husband! I'm entitled to close out her credit card, right? AGAIN WRONG. The bank would not remove her from the accounts and close the credit card (I paid it off before I tried to close it.) without her signature.


If you get those Powers of Attorneys when you are both healthy, most banks will do free notarization. And it is a good safe guard.

This advice works for same sex couples and male/female couples.

PLEASE reduce your heart ache before you have this emotional dark times.

There must be something screwy going on in the state in which the OP (Dominic58) lives, because I didn't have all of those problems while my late wife as undergoing medical treatments, and I had no problem closing any of her accounts after she died. All I needed was my marriage license (in some cases) and her death certificate.

Still, if you want to play it safe, then the OP's suggestions should be taken.

[Personal Note: I originally joined Mingle2 as a way of coping with the death of my wife.]

Yes, if you have too much... the spouse may get ideas. Like the money could keep them warmer than you do. And it is hard to sleep with one eye open!

There must be something screwy going on in the state in which the OP (Dominic58) lives, because I didn't have all of those problems while my late wife as undergoing medical treatments, and I had no problem closing any of her accounts after she died. All I needed was my marriage license (in some cases) and her death certificate.

Still, if you want to play it safe, then the OP's suggestions should be taken.

[Personal Note: I originally joined Mingle2 as a way of coping with the death of my wife.]

You are really a funny man Dominic, lots of sense of humor; I admire that and you do look way much younger than your age; thought at first you're my fellow countryman