Does anyone else find it absolutely ridiculous that a black man gets the word *edit* removed from his posts on an website that's supposed to be aimed at people 18 and over? Would it be less offensive to you if I started using the term "person of color"?

Just thought you should know =P

I use this account name for different things, I don't like that anyone can google it and see that I'm on a dating site. It gives my profile and a few of the things I've posted on.

I don't mind that other users can see, but I do want a modicum of privacy. I tried de-activating my account and it still comes up.

Spot on dude. Clearly I could not put it better myself.

There you go, articulated well without the use of cynicism or sarcasm. If you can say that you disagree with this post and actually provide a sound reason as to why (not even one I agree with), please do.

I used a personal situation as an example. Clearly you read what you wanted to read and that's cool. Generally people without real foundations for what they're saying are content to dismiss other people as being unfit for discussion instead of actually explaining their point further =P

Haha, you posted a thread saying that guys particularly liked blonds because it they were looking for virgins and I made a point with a sweeping generalization of my own. I'm sorry if you thought I was attacking you, but I would've said that to anyone who posted that thread.

I've already said I'm not looking for advice. I'm actually doing pretty well. I found my reasons to keep going and I am. But to say that it's not natural to feel sad and that I chose that for myself is something I think is worth responding to.

To a point, I think it's also worth responding to people who take my views out of context or misrepresent them. I've continued to do so because I'm talking to different people, but I'm not gonna go back and forth with one person over an issue. I'll say what I'm gonna say to who I'm gonna say it. I think it's pretty reasonable, considering I'm not the one belittling other people's problems.

It's self pitying bullsh*t to think that people have feelings? Kudos for having a hard life and dealing with it, but you miss the point. I think it's pretty natural for a person going through hard times to be upset about it. I respect people who can keep their head high in hard times, but I'm not impatient or intolerant of those who can't.

There's a difference between not having control of something and giving up control. There are things that make people sad, and there are people who make themselves sad. I agree that people who simply give up on happiness are making a bad choice, but to say that people who are unhappy choose to be so is just stupid.


How's about you don't quote me and then say something like that if it's not directed to me then? It's not egocentric, it's common sense.

Presenting a different point of view and then defending it isn't being closed-minded. If I simply give up a point of view any time someone raises an opposing one, then I don't actually have one of my own. Clinging to a point of view that you know to be obsolete is being closed-minded.



That's right, I CHOSE to be saddened by the loss of a family member. Her dying didn't make me feel that way, it was my mind! *Gasp* Thank you so much. That whole bit with the screaming for help, the look of terror she had, the chips of dried blood in the tile, that was all in my head. A self-destructive mind-**** because I figured life was just going just a little bit too well..

It's not as though extraneous circumstances can lead to a chemical change in the body that gives us feelings of sadness, levity, lust or aggression, right?


This is what I'm talking about. This isn't advice, it's holier than thou bullsh*t. What the hell kind of advice is "it only exists in... YOUR world." If I drove a car through a shopping center, plowing over everyone in sight. Stopped, got out of the car and looked at all of the enraged and saddened survivors and said "Don't be upset! It's all in your mind!" Do you think that'd actually help anyone?

I'm not looking for help. I'm actually adjusting pretty well, all things considered.

I'm just pointing out that you guys can give whatever recycled advice you want, but that doesn't mean it actually means anything. These are all just words.


"The only one who can make changes in our lives, is us, it just depends how much you want it."
Do you think that people always end up where the want to be? Do all people who end up in bad places end up there because they didn't WANT to be in a good one? Of course not, sometimes you reach up and you fall.

"You're in control of your own destiny."
No, you're in control of what you do. There's no way of telling what will actually happen because of what actions we take, you can only do your best.

"The only one who can make changes in our lives is us."
Really? Cause I'm pretty sure that just about anyone can make a lot of choices that can change a lot of people's lives.

These aren't helpful quotes. These are just words with no real value. I'm all for giving advice and motivational tidbits, but they have to actually advise and motivate.

That's funny, I have an opinion, it's just a jaded one.

I guess I must be jaded because I don't see the positive in seeing the person I love most say "I'm passing out," as they lose consciousness, slump into a pool of their own blood and die.

Why don't you help me out with my jaded young mind and tell me what gift I'm missing out on?

Well isn't that great, I didn't know that I was entitled to a gift as soon as she was done bleeding out in the shower. Where can I pick that up?

...Are you serious? That kind of stuff works great for after school specials, but in the real world, not so much. Sometimes there's a positive to the negative and sometimes people just die.

**** happens, sometimes it makes us sad. When my mother passed away, I had mood swings, crying fits and came pretty close to offing myself. Am I responsible for feeling that way? Or was seeing my mom bleed out in the shower just the most tragic and horrifying day in my life?

See, we can control our mood, but life's comedies and tragedies affect our emotions.

Straight up, 1-10. Preferably the last person of the opposite sex to post before you, but do what you want.

I give Monica from the eHarmony ad up there a 4.5 cause I'm not a big fan of that dude Josh she's with =P

You know, it didn't even occur to me that she pulled a prank on a handicapped person. I've gone from busting up laughing to "Oh ****, that's ****ed up" that fast all week.

I'll respectfully decline.

Sounds like you lost your wife to some guy who told you he was your best friend and you believed him =/

I say call her first. If she refuses to do that, then it's a guy trying to set himself up.

Every guy with a decent sized d*ck either:

A. Knows exactly how long it is.
B. Has a ****ed up ruler =P

The problem is that this is a cycle that feeds itself. Because while you've calmed down and said that this was out of emotion, lots of guys don't. These are the guys that go out and eventually find a girl that will let themselves get walked all over.

But yes, I whole-heartedly agree. Lot's girls don't see a nice guy, they see a friend or a doormat.

One thing that girls don't seem to see is that guys who have experienced success in dating, will stick to what has worked for them. Take a gander at the advice section and you tell me how many girls are complaining about the a**holes they're dating and how many nice guys can't find a girl.

Yeah, you let this happen, but you didn't do it to yourself. I'm sorry, that's just retarded. You didn't make out with those guys, did you? No, I didn't think so =/

Ok dude, I get it. You respond with a one-liner, comedy optional, you do the ... and your emoticon chain smokes another cig. You're real formulaic- oh I mean cynical and cool and all that.