The general rule of thumb that I hacve seen lately (this thread is popped up every coupl ewof months) is that it HSOULD be the person asking.

Myself, however, I will plan to pay even if I was the one to be asked out. If she wants to pay, even part, she needs to say so, cause I will not ask. I will let her pay if she states that is what she wants (if she asked, lol)

I had lunch with a female friend today and we had this same convo. She explained to me that since she called me and asked me out to have breakfast with her, it should have been obvious to me that she wanted to take ME out, and as such would be paying.

Like the original poster, I've been raised to pay when out with a woman. Whether it's dinner, or a coke in the convenience store, or a loaf of bread that I pick up on the way to the gf's house. It's a cultural thing I guess. However, since I've re-entered the dating game over the last year or so, I've had 2 or 3 women insist on paying, even tho us going out on the first or second date was a mutual thing. Hesitantly I capitulated.

I have made some bets and lost and owe my friend darrell dinner.. he hasnt collected yet..

Ohh I never do feel that I owe anyone but my friendship, but actually now days it is not out of line for a woman to pay for the meal just like it is no longer deemed as not proper for a woman to ask a guy out.

Just that when someone ask you out they have every intentions of paying for they want to not because they feel a need too. All one has to say is okay next time I'm paying they will agree. For now days there are many women that are not out to break the guy but to enjoy having them around. Most understand for more and more women are being paid on the same scale.

I taught my daughter as well as my son it is okay for the other to pay but not to take advantage of it.

Well put Jimboy, very well put!!! My sentiments exactly!

Thank you sir!..I hate these guys out here who make women feel manipulated in that they have to give something up

i also agree...if i were to invite someone out i would pay...the man can take care of the tip if he wants...or agree to pay half..

I usually don't ask men out until after we've had a first date. I used to. But I didn't like the results. Maybe it was just the guys I chose, I'm not sure. But they seemed a lot less invested in the date and/or relationship if they didn't do the initial pursuing.

okay. there are actually rules about this.

if the man asks you out, and the woman doesn't really know you....the man pays.

if the man asks a woman out, and they've known each other awhile...they can go dutch or she can pay, or himself.

just depends on who's doing the asking and how long you've known each other.

BTW. I hate guys who flaunt their money "I'm rich, i got 234 cars, etc..." and then ask if i can pay. Butts.

I know right, more ladies need to ball up and ask guys out, it's not the fifties any more, and it is a great pleasure when a woman like you enough to take the initiative

I generally ask,
that way it's clear.

This is what I was going to say.

This day and age you let her pay. You are not your father. If she ask, why insult her by paying. Just make a polite offer, and then let her pay. she will feel you respect her as an equal.

Um, good luck with that.