I know this girl and we met at work and have been good friends ever since for about 6 months now. I have always had deeper feelings for her then friendship ever since we met. There is one problem with it though...

she has a boyfriend.

I can't tell if she likes me more than a friend but told me recently that her b/f comes home drunk a lot and I don't think he's right for her.

Should I tell her about my feelings for her? And if so how should I do it?

not cool dont take a guys girl

personally i don't shpadoinkle in another mans padooder. your looking for trouble there. i'd say let it be till she sends him packing. then try to move in.


at the absolute most ask her if she really wants to be with a drunk and leave it at that,

Yea what he said...lol

some guys don't deserve to be with the girl they're with

your only agreeing cuz you want me.......

it's ok to want......

Remember it can happen to you and think if it was your girl
NOT COOL
Cooly

they may not deserve them but you don't have the right to get in between a relationship like that.

It's up to her to decide who she wants to be with... if you're not careful, you may end up with no friendship at all or you may end up being the rebound guy.

you're probably right, i don't want to break them up it's just hard trying to deal with feelings for someone when you have to hide them

both of those options are unpleasant. although one is a little better than the other jkjk

she confides in you because you are her friend, don't use that angle to break her up with her bf.

hehe I know... that's why I said be careful

thanks for the advice everyone. I'm just going to be her friend and if it's meant to be we will eventually be together

Jealousy has a way of creeping into these situations. It is best to leave your feelings about her current boyfriend out of the equation. You would most likely find *something* to disapprove of her current boyfriend or anyone if you want someone who is already attached. This is only human... but the response to that kind of criticism is to get defensive and resent you for it. That is also only human.

Leaving your "he's not good enough for you, I'm better" feelings aside, take a look at the relationship between you and your "friend" as it stands on its own. Would you be happy simply being friends for the rest of your time together? If so, it might not be worth it to risk revealing your extra feelings - she might receive them awkwardly and it might make things weird between you, especially because if she feels the same way, it will create a conflict for her because she already has a boyfriend. But, hey, you know her better than I possibly could. Maybe she can handle such things gracefully.

In the end, consider that her choice of boyfriends is also an indication of some part of her, and in the end is only changeable by her. Don't try to convince her under any circumstances to ditch her current man. Let her arrive at that decision herself, should she choose to.

If you want to reveal your feelings for her, and you don't think she'll take them as binding (binding = we HAVE to be together as more than friends or I don't want to hang out with you anymore) then go ahead. There's nothing to lose, there. How she handles your feelings will also be a key indicator for the future of your relationship, as friends or otherwise. And, in the end, regardless of what you read in this forum, the choice is yours.

Oops, I guess you already made a choice on this one. I didn't read till the end. Well, good luck to you, buddy.

I say tell her exactly what you said. That you're her friend and care for her and you don't think she deserves a bf that's coming home drunk every night. Just let her know there's better guys out there if she's unhappy.

thanks for your opinion. i have a lot of mixed feelings right now so it's hard to know what to do. It's probably a better idea not to mention it i guess for a few reasons. On the other hand, I'm also dying to know how she feels about me. We are going to see a movie on monday, I'll just see how it goes

All you have to do is look like the better guy.....and hopefully she will open her eyes and look!!!

whats with u and those pics gypsy41? you got me rolling over here