hi, so i have never had a relationship ever. i want to know what is off putting about me? lol anyone answer? to be fair i dont actually go out and i keep to myself, im probably autistic or something i dunno.

also look at that huge vein on my head, thats totally because ive been single my entire life. it really shows! lol (they removed my head vein photo but the one with the htler looking tash is ok? lol)

I hear ya bro..I'm not sure there's any "real" women on this site..all I've seen is scammers..which is probably little men in Bangkok posing as Western women..

This 4th dating site I joined these sites scam you “ you have 10 likes “ to make you pay to see who liked you and get hopes up and only to find all 10 women Fake

As you seem sincere, maybe it is you..entirely.
You project who you are by your words, actions
and reactions.

You also project that you expect failure.
Then you give them reasons, handy.

I have a fat friend who every time you come into
her presence will tell a fat joke. I assume to get
there before anyone else can, as armor.

I am very different from you.
The assumption I make is always, that they will
like me. I went to 4 high schools, it was always
the same. Always had a smile, a nod, a sympathy
look for strangers.

Do you? Or are you so poor, focused on the
expectation of rejection that you cannot
afford pleasantries?

That is all it takes, really..you can train your
resting face to be more pleasant. I had to,
because people would always ask if I was
mad at them ;-)

It is a simple start, always have a list in your
mind of all the things you do well, even if is
only listening, a forgotten grace but surefire.

Give yourself credit for the positive stuff you
are capable of, might make you smile ;-)

You seem to say it yourself. You don't get out. You keep to yourself. Seems pretty clear that you need to get out more and be more open. Join a club. Get a hobby that gets you seen, like at conventions and meet-ups. You say you're fit, so get out to parks and get involved in your community. You'll probably be better for it even before meeting your date.

That, and what soufiehere said above.

i probably do kinda expect rejection by default tbh
even in things where your required to be picked i always expect to be picked last i guess because thats all i have known. then you tell yourself your not good enough anyway and end up cutting yourself off from others. only responding if spoken to, feeling out of place everywhere.

I think you have a very positive profile and have a lot going for you and there is nothing unattractive about you. I don`t understand but your not alone in the situation your in. A lot of things in life make no sense and are not fair it seems

I think it's because, as you've said, you don't go out. On line dating is not a great way to meet people. If you want to meet someone, you have to go outside and talk to people.

No One is Better than You or I or Any Person.
Even the Pope or Even the President.

We are All Human Beings.
We are All Fighting the Evil and Negativity in This World.

Next Time Someone Belittles You >
Simply Turn Around > and MOON Them !!!

All the advice given by others here is good, you do need to Mingle more on the outside, hobby clubs, sports clubs, further education, wherever your interests are, places where you meet people in a social setting.
In my opinion you need to look at your personal appearance, not that there is anything wrong with how you look now, here is what I mean I found this on the internet:

"Personal appearance is an individual's overall presentation, including their dress, grooming, and nonverbal communication, which significantly influences first impressions and is important for professional and personal identity. It encompasses both external elements like clothing and hairstyle, and internal aspects such as posture and demeanor, and can affect perceptions in both social and professional settings. "

I would suggest you change your hairstyle to something shorter, shave off your beard and moustache, more women prefer clean cut and shaven men. Remember, your goal here is to attract more women, so in my opinion you need to change your appearance, because the way you are now just isn't working for you. Looking more like the average and usual guy in the street is definitely worth a try. Good luck in your search.

ok so i do seem to get messages on this site unlike other sites. but i cant distinguish whether they are fake or not, if they ask me to chat on some outside source and not here does that mean they are trying to scam me in some way? lol

Yes.

It’s seems so hard to find someone who wants to do the same things are you do and is a lover of animals and nature ,asking for love and a long term relationship seems too much to ask for this days

Good call Sophie.

But it IS easier for chicks

For the sheer volume of choices you may be right.

But alas, men seemed tied to what they see only
on the outside, makes them look better and also
makes them stand out to their friends, arm candy
seems to win the day. Women can be mean, biotchy
and calculating, but because of their looks, they
are swamped with attention.

Had the post been a 'chick' the advice might still
be the same, but I simply cannot vouch for men's
reactions..how many men do you know who would be
proud to have an 'ugly' chick on their arm?

Charles Bronson was a star but realistic about
his looks..he needn't have worried, women see
character and truthfulness long before handsome.

Man or woman, charm can go a long way.

looks only last the initial meeting in my opinion.
i worked with this not too great looking small podgy indian woman one time, but she was nice, i could talk with her, she was a relatable nice person and i thought, yeah i could be with someone like that. although she was already married so thats a no go for me lol

The outside is only the attraction, the ones that are nasty on the inside probably do not keep any good guys around...Which probably increases their bad attitude. Just because someone is getting attention, it may not be the best attention.

I see you, man. And I've only been here a couple of weeks.

Thanks for opening up. It takes a lot of courage to share something so personal. There is absolutely nothing “wrong” or “off-putting” about you. Please don’t be so hard on yourself.

A lot of people haven’t had a relationship yet for many different reasons timing, environment, personal comfort, social habits, or simply not meeting the right person. It doesn’t mean you’re flawed or unlovable.

You keep to yourself and don't go out much, that alone can make dating harder, and that’s completely normal. You are allowed to grow at your own pace.

As for your appearance, we’re always our own biggest critics. The things you’re worried about are probably things most people wouldn’t even notice, and even if they did, they wouldn’t define you as a person.

And trust me, the right person will come. They won´t care if you have a vein on your head or if you look like Tom Cruise. They'll love you like you're the most incredible person they've ever met. Real connections go way beyond looks.

That's a loaded question Sophie!

Ask how many pleasant to be around chicks with a MID face and bod that a guy would be proud to have on their arm. That would be more of an appropriate question to gauge men's motives.

I don't think you can use Charles Bronson as an example. The world in the 70's wasn't the same world we live in today. People upgrade their love interests just as often as cell phones because they can. Charles Bronson couldn't make it in today's world.

Women are also tied to looks. I think it's human nature for both sexes. I believe for women it is more important for selection, because when it comes to bumping uglies and the potential for pregnancy - there are more consequences at stake for her. I do get the idea of kids having faces only a mother could love, which suggests that women are capable of loving a beast. But I'd think that the mother would want the child to be aesthetically pleasing so the child can flourish in life and not be burdened by one more thing to hold them back. Women can kind of mitigate this with the choice of men they sleep with.

You are absolutely right with charm. It really does go a long way.