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Topic: honesty?
kmtiburona's photo
Sun 12/30/07 02:50 PM
While looking for that special someone I feel honesty is very important. And constantly while browsing other's profiles, I see men writing looking for honest woman, no games, etc. So when someone im's you or emails you and you are not interested is saying I'm sorry your not my type overused? Is that not a good thing to say?

I'm only asking since it's been a while since I've been in the dating scene and just had an experience where this happened and when I said he wasn't my type, I then got 20 questions as to what my type was? Does it really matter? Do I need to justify my reason for not being physically attracted to a person? I am asking these, since I am pretty nice and would hate to tell someone, well ur a little too fat for me and this and that and the next thing. Should I have told him specifically what was wrong, even if it could not be changed?

After I told him he was not my type he expressed some vulgarity to me, so I just want to make sure it's ok to use the general response. I don't know what else to say w/o hurting someone's feelings.

TheMagicalMatt's photo
Sun 12/30/07 02:53 PM
honesty?

azrae1l's photo
Sun 12/30/07 02:54 PM
maybe just say "thanks, but i'm not interested" and leave it at that? i dunno, men are pricks and a lot get pissed if you don't jump all over them, think your a b1tch or prude or something. best to just say your not interested and walk away at that point.

cuzimwhiteboy's photo
Sun 12/30/07 02:58 PM
It's not the most honest approach, but why not tell him, "I have my father's gun and a scorching case of herpes." That should do the trick.

MsTeddyBear2u's photo
Sun 12/30/07 02:59 PM
Honesty is allways the best policy- I believe...
You should not have to explain yourself to a complete stranger.
Listen to yourself and what you want...Nothing wrong with that!

If he gave you the 20 questions- sounds like he was so sure of himself- he did'nt think you should turn him down... huh

There is no law against- just making friend's in here though.
Not everyone we meet in here will click with us.

Good luck to you!
There are alot of great people in here...

itsmetina's photo
Sun 12/30/07 03:00 PM
i just block them

no photo
Sun 12/30/07 03:00 PM
I don't know. You could lie and say you've just met someone. That's kind of a polite way to let someone down. Even though it's not true.

no photo
Sun 12/30/07 03:01 PM

While looking for that special someone I feel honesty is very important. And constantly while browsing other's profiles, I see men writing looking for honest woman, no games, etc. So when someone im's you or emails you and you are not interested is saying I'm sorry your not my type overused? Is that not a good thing to say?

I'm only asking since it's been a while since I've been in the dating scene and just had an experience where this happened and when I said he wasn't my type, I then got 20 questions as to what my type was? Does it really matter? Do I need to justify my reason for not being physically attracted to a person? I am asking these, since I am pretty nice and would hate to tell someone, well ur a little too fat for me and this and that and the next thing. Should I have told him specifically what was wrong, even if it could not be changed?

After I told him he was not my type he expressed some vulgarity to me, so I just want to make sure it's ok to use the general response. I don't know what else to say w/o hurting someone's feelings.

You can deal with people here however YOU want?
But if you try and show them a respectful attitude and their RUDE, then its THEIR BAD, NOT YOURS.
If you get a im or email I think you should tell them YOUR not interested if YOUR NOT> and if they don't seem to understand then just block them as to fight with them.

NOW, as far as ME GOES, I would NEVER write to YOU because YOU are showing that YOUR SEPERATED, and I don't TRY to meet or date anyone married or seperated, THATS, MY preference, NOR,
REALLY HUGE women... and YES.
THAT has caused me ALOT of attitudes on here, but, ITS ME, and REAL.. so???? I am but who I am as YOU are WHO YOU ARE!!
Good Luck and just take people for what they give YOU and if their NICE,,cool.
If their MEAN,,lose-um....:heart: flowerforyou drinker

alibobz's photo
Sun 12/30/07 03:02 PM
Erm,

Just my 2 pence worth here lass but, by saying that someone isn't ure type you are kind of saying that there is something about a person that you don't like. Would it be better to either reply with a standard you are not looking for a date or don't wish to hook up with random nenbers & take the offended route if the conversation goes pear shaped?

You can't and won't ever please everyone however hard you try.

BTW, whats wrong with me? lol

Take care lass :)

BlueskyJ's photo
Sun 12/30/07 03:17 PM
I either say "thanks, but I'm not interested" or "thanks, but we are not a match"...I just sent someone an email saying that "Long distance relationships don't work for me".....

Either way I only say No once....if they persist even once, I Block Them....

After all, its only the internet & you owe them nothing.....

Charles23's photo
Sun 12/30/07 03:57 PM
Truely, giving some reply and letting them know is a nice gesture. Also, it lets them know your not interested.

Honesty is the best policy, how else would I or anyone else know what faults you have if nobody tells you?

no photo
Sun 12/30/07 09:54 PM
Just be polite and drop them a reply that you are not interested...What's that take, about 2 minutes after reading their profile. A lot nicer then not replying to them at all!

And if they continue, Block'em!

yantraimages's photo
Mon 12/31/07 12:44 AM
I was going to say "Honesty, what a revelation, Honesty important in a relationship" But then I read your post. In basically rejecting someone it's tough, I don't care if it is the internet, I don't enjoy hurting other peoples feelings either. Sometimes you just have to be rude though. Today this guy with big scabdrinker s on his lips asked for a sip of my coffee. Sometimes you just have to say no.drinker noway

kmtiburona's photo
Mon 12/31/07 09:11 AM
Thank you all for your replies. I think there are some very good other ways I can kinda try to let them down maybe easier. I realize I can't make everyone happy, but I wanted to make sure my dating tactics weren't out of date. LOL.

thank you all again!

no photo
Mon 12/31/07 09:23 AM
Honesty is good with a little sugar on top to make it not be hurtfull!!!

trueokie2's photo
Mon 12/31/07 09:24 AM
Edited by trueokie2 on Mon 12/31/07 09:32 AM
I personally write them back and say I would like to be your friend first. Then if we don't click for some reason I tell them I don't feel the same as you. I hope we can still be friends tho.

That is just me, I like to get to know people and see there veiws on things to see if we are compatible.

Good Luck to You...flowerforyou

Godschosengirl's photo
Mon 12/31/07 09:41 AM
I believe in being honest even if it means losing the person you love like I did.:cry:

kojack's photo
Mon 12/31/07 09:48 AM
Honesty is important.

I usually say, I like you but only as a friend. I don't want to hurt you or your feelings, that is not my intent, but I feel honesty is very important, and I don't like to play with someones emotions, so lets just be friends okay.


FETTS61's photo
Mon 12/31/07 09:48 AM
IF YOU ARE TRYING TO BUILD A NEW RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEONE,BE IT A FIRST MEETING OR WHATEVER,HONESTY IS THE ONLY WAY TO HAVE A HEALTHY FRIENDSHIP OR RELATIONSHIP.

stevex86's photo
Mon 12/31/07 09:49 AM
I would rather get the thanks, but your not my type over the norm of just no response at all. I think its kind of rude when someone took the time to write you to just leave them hanging.

But I also no, some guys are pricks and would respond out of hurt feelings so I guess I understand when I am left hanging for all eternity.

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