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| Topic: Can you love your partner more than yourself | |
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If you do there is something seriously wrong with your self-esteem?
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My ex wanted me to literally walk all over her. When she wanted me to crack her back, she wanted me to stand on her back. I didn't like that because you can really cause some damage doing that. I don't even like doing the thing where one crosses their arms and you lift them from behind. IDK, just seems too risky to me. I did like to give her a back massage and crack her back that way. It was nice, intimate, and safe... and it worked. well now that she is your ex, don't you wish at times that you did walk all over her. Just asking because you had mentioned many times in the forums you were feeling so bad when she took your kids away from you. None of my business? ok then, I apologize. You're good darling.  "My Only Regret... Is That I Have Boneitis..." http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4O1TbUHGN_k |
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Plenty have sacrificed themselves to save their partner or children.
Also common in the animal kingdom. |
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Plenty have sacrificed themselves to save their partner or children. Also common in the animal kingdom. True true colors show during critical times |
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haii
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LOVE is just a "word" proving nothing. It is easy to say you love someone when all in life is going great, exciting, happy w/$$$ to buy lots of 'Fun!' But just for the moment all who are reading this...imagine suddenly w/out warning your mate becomes disabled/disfigured/helpless & your world is turned upside down!!! No more 'fun'...no more exciting/hot passionate lovemaking or going out doing 'fun' things..or beautiful, expensive house/cars/clothes/jewelry to show off to others...ALL 'FUN' is gone, NO more $$$ left to go & buy as always before..."ALL" is lost in the blink of an eye! Now only unbearable suffering day after lonely day/night w/your mate unable to communicate/walk/talk/comfort or hold you! YOU live alone, eat alone, sleep alone w/a mate now bed ridden in a coma. Be HONEST...ask yourself WHAT would "YOU" do if this happened suddenly w/out warning??? Would YOU (1) remain caring, loving as before? (2) happy, excited? (3) still attracted to your sleeping mate who does not even know you are there by his/her side speaking to him/her? Would you provide tender, devoted, loving/protective care to him/her knowing he/she would do the same for YOU if situation was reversed? And would YOU remain still in "LOVE" & "FIERCELY FAITHFUL" W/NO SEX MO AFTER LONELY MO? I DID...it happened to ME @ 27yo married to my beloved childhood husband & father of our 3 precious baby boys 6yo, 3 yo, 8mo w/out 'warning!' I was an only child w/a father who had 'silently' disappeared in the night when I was 9yo not seeing or word from him till I was 18yo. A mother & repeated step-parents who were NOT child caring/loving in any way. My deceased husband's father had died when he was 4yo. His lovving mom killed in car wreck before his death before. Bk then all I had in this world was my beloved husband & our 3 cherished baby boys that only "I" had to financially & totally continue to support/feed/clothe/raise/protect/take care of ALONE w/NO one to help for the 5 of us. No one ever told me about "SS disability help; Groceries, school lunches, discounted rental housing & all medical dental/doctors/hospitals/college/etc! I had NO idea about any of THIS help! I had worked after school since 15yo (also took in ironing, babysitting, etc starting @ 11yo) then taken off on my own @ 18yo working 60hrs wk $.50 hr paying $60 mo for tiny room w/no air/tv, car, phone, medical ins, protection or enough food while walking 13 blocks to work freezing rain, burning heat, whatever weather while waiting for my loving fiancé to return from overseas Nam time & Navy discharge 2yrs later. No one told me about "Military" benefits later when he became disabled. I was totally ignorant to anything outside of our once beautiful "Camelot" 11yr marriage which was the ONLY ambition I had ever dreamed of while growing up in repeated emotionally abusive divorced parents lifestyles over & over where I had to remain "silent" wanting nothing, saying nothing & no one to care about my wants/needs..I was 'invisible.' LOVE? I never knew the true meaning of that word till moment he returned from overseas & we married simply w/me wearing my $12.00 white 2 piece Sears wedding suit & my darling gave me my only gift ever (w/my wedding ring set he had bought overseas) a small, treasured white Bible...the day MY life began*ALL of you out there reading my story now, you believe YOU know what that word "LOVE" means? Really? I never looked or ever thought of any other man never once in all that LONELY, SAD nightmare life gone through ALONE w/the weight of EVERYTHING on MY thankfully strong shoulders! HE was my soulmate...my beloved...my first & only love forever. Yes "I" know what LOVE means & if anyone out there reading this info wants to know more please write me & remember; "THE MOST PRECIOUS, BEAUTIFUL OF ALL TREASURES IN THIS WORLD CAN NOT BE SEEN OR EVEN HEARD...BUT ONLY FELT LIVING SILENTLY INSIDE OUR HEARTS FOREVER."
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LOVE is just a "word" proving nothing. It is easy to say you love someone when all in life is going great, exciting, happy w/$$$ to buy lots of 'Fun!' But just for the moment all who are reading this...imagine suddenly w/out warning your mate becomes disabled/disfigured/helpless & your world is turned upside down!!! No more 'fun'...no more exciting/hot passionate lovemaking or going out doing 'fun' things..or beautiful, expensive house/cars/clothes/jewelry to show off to others...ALL 'FUN' is gone, NO more $$$ left to go & buy as always before..."ALL" is lost in the blink of an eye! Now only unbearable suffering day after lonely day/night w/your mate unable to communicate/walk/talk/comfort or hold you! YOU live alone, eat alone, sleep alone w/a mate now bed ridden in a coma. Be HONEST...ask yourself WHAT would "YOU" do if this happened suddenly w/out warning??? Would YOU (1) remain caring, loving as before? (2) happy, excited? (3) still attracted to your sleeping mate who does not even know you are there by his/her side speaking to him/her? Would you provide tender, devoted, loving/protective care to him/her knowing he/she would do the same for YOU if situation was reversed? And would YOU remain still in "LOVE" & "FIERCELY FAITHFUL" W/NO SEX MO AFTER LONELY MO? I DID...it happened to ME @ 27yo married to my beloved childhood husband & father of our 3 precious baby boys 6yo, 3 yo, 8mo w/out 'warning!' I was an only child w/a father who had 'silently' disappeared in the night when I was 9yo not seeing or word from him till I was 18yo. A mother & repeated step-parents who were NOT child caring/loving in any way. My deceased husband's father had died when he was 4yo. His lovving mom killed in car wreck before his death before. Bk then all I had in this world was my beloved husband & our 3 cherished baby boys that only "I" had to financially & totally continue to support/feed/clothe/raise/protect/take care of ALONE w/NO one to help for the 5 of us. No one ever told me about "SS disability help; Groceries, school lunches, discounted rental housing & all medical dental/doctors/hospitals/college/etc! I had NO idea about any of THIS help! I had worked after school since 15yo (also took in ironing, babysitting, etc starting @ 11yo) then taken off on my own @ 18yo working 60hrs wk $.50 hr paying $60 mo for tiny room w/no air/tv, car, phone, medical ins, protection or enough food while walking 13 blocks to work freezing rain, burning heat, whatever weather while waiting for my loving fiancé to return from overseas Nam time & Navy discharge 2yrs later. No one told me about "Military" benefits later when he became disabled. I was totally ignorant to anything outside of our once beautiful "Camelot" 11yr marriage which was the ONLY ambition I had ever dreamed of while growing up in repeated emotionally abusive divorced parents lifestyles over & over where I had to remain "silent" wanting nothing, saying nothing & no one to care about my wants/needs..I was 'invisible.' LOVE? I never knew the true meaning of that word till moment he returned from overseas & we married simply w/me wearing my $12.00 white 2 piece Sears wedding suit & my darling gave me my only gift ever (w/my wedding ring set he had bought overseas) a small, treasured white Bible...the day MY life began*ALL of you out there reading my story now, you believe YOU know what that word "LOVE" means? Really? I never looked or ever thought of any other man never once in all that LONELY, SAD nightmare life gone through ALONE w/the weight of EVERYTHING on MY thankfully strong shoulders! HE was my soulmate...my beloved...my first & only love forever. Yes "I" know what LOVE means & if anyone out there reading this info wants to know more please write me & remember; "THE MOST PRECIOUS, BEAUTIFUL OF ALL TREASURES IN THIS WORLD CAN NOT BE SEEN OR EVEN HEARD...BUT ONLY FELT LIVING SILENTLY INSIDE OUR HEARTS FOREVER." Thank you very much for your life story. When I read it tears filled my eyes. Only those who experience ups and downs especially downs and valleys do they have a right to say what love really is . May life treat you and your family well  
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I read this moving story on Quora just now
https://qr.ae/TWv2UF |
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hi
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Yes is possible but dangerous
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No greater love than to give your life for another.
But it has to be a reciprocal relationship. |
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Choosing to protect a partner with your life. Yes.
Loving someone more than myself? No. Love should be reciprocal not dependent upon subservience. |
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Love this topic thanks for this
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I think the love you have for a partner is different to the love you have for yourself.
You can be comfortable with yourself and proud of the things you do for others and a partner. Love for a partner is putting them first. But that only works if it's both ways. Nice topic grace as usual  Asle. Hope all is ok in Hong Kong, stay safe 
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Edited by
SparklingCrystal 💖💎
on
Fri 08/09/19 03:18 AM
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I few people saying...
It only works if it's both ways. That is CONDITIONAL love. What if they -or you- have a really bad hairday, get ill for a longer period of time, or depressed, and cannot give the other all that love because they have to focus on their own well-being. Do you then get miserable, angry, bitter etc. as you're not getting love anymore? What if you split up. Then your source of love and happiness is gone... Maybe that's why so many people get in trouble after a breakup. It's vitally important to FIRST fill yourself with love of Self. And when you got enough so it begins to spill over then you got something to give, without depleting yourself. Then you can also hold your love for another stable without it being conditional. |
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I think the love you have for a partner is different to the love you have for yourself. You can be comfortable with yourself and proud of the things you do for others and a partner. Love for a partner is putting them first. But that only works if it's both ways. Nice topic grace as usual Asle. Hope all is ok in Hong Kong, stay safe Hi good day thanks |
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I few people saying... It only works if it's both ways. That is CONDITIONAL love. What if they -or you- have a really bad hairday, get ill for a longer period of time, or depressed, and cannot give the other all that love because they have to focus on their own well-being. Do you then get miserable, angry, bitter etc. as you're not getting love anymore? What if you split up. Then your source of love and happiness is gone... Maybe that's why so many people get in trouble after a breakup. It's vitally important to FIRST fill yourself with love of Self. And when you got enough so it begins to spill over then you got something to give, without depleting yourself. Then you can also hold your love for another stable without it being conditional. Unconditional love is more precious than 
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i will give her every moment joyness and happiness...
if she happy then i will be very happy |
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I few people saying... It only works if it's both ways. That is CONDITIONAL love. What if they -or you- have a really bad hairday, get ill for a longer period of time, or depressed, and cannot give the other all that love because they have to focus on their own well-being. Do you then get miserable, angry, bitter etc. as you're not getting love anymore? What if you split up. Then your source of love and happiness is gone... Maybe that's why so many people get in trouble after a breakup. It's vitally important to FIRST fill yourself with love of Self. And when you got enough so it begins to spill over then you got something to give, without depleting yourself. Then you can also hold your love for another stable without it being conditional. Well. Some people who 'love themselves ' can be arrogant and think they are above others. Regarding a bad hair day well love should be through good and bad. If you split up then eventually that love should fade or it will put your life in limbo stopping you from finding love with someone else 
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i will give her every moment joyness and happiness... if she happy then i will be very happy Happy wife happy life ? |
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