So I’ve been on quite a few dates with a woman but I don’t feel any passion. I really enjoy hanging out with her but I don’t feel much physical desire. No interest in romance with her at the moment. Is there a chance the passion will grow passion grow in the future? What you think?

Maybe, maybe not.
Leave her in the friend zone until
something..happens for you.

In other country's a Arranged marriage has no passion!

it really only the USA that Focus's on this stuff, it has a 1 in 3 chances of working out.

Compared to the 1 in 47 arranged marriages last beyond 40yrs.

In the 40's 50's it was a courtship it took up to 3 yrs and

in the 1886, it was a slow stepping stone to get into the front door. Even then it took almost 5 yrs before you could have her hand in marriage.

Lust happens fast, but love takes a lifetime! If you have not emotions its because you don't see this woman as a Sex symbol. That might be a good thing. You don't want to hurt her in any way.

See, boys in grade school don't like the girl they are more worried about the boys on the basketball team. However the girls are making funny faces and nudging them, kicking them and hitting them, some might even pull one's hair.

Then when the girl grows up the boy becomes attracted to the girl but still, he is confused, she spends all her time with her friends. Giving no clue if she likes him.

one day out of the blues the boy takes this girl to the movies, then next time to the beach, then next time to the amusement park. he starts to see all the different sides of the girl and little by little he starts to see her laughter and hear her tears at times.

The girl has told him all about her happy childhood and the not so good in this the boy falls in love with her and wants to be her all.

The rest is dating and marriage.

Your afraid to fall in love with this women so you keep your heart closed because you know too much about her and about other relationships she has had. it really is that simple your protecting her from yourself.

hope this helps.

Wish I could get in on that arranged marriage lol
I was in a relationship for a while and got use to certain things now I’m back out here trying to date and I must admit I’m somewhat annoyed. She seems like a good friend but she doesn’t have the take charge personality that I enjoy.
So much that isn’t there that I wish was.

Not sure how to proceed at this point. Been single like 1and a half years now

If you sense that she is developing strong feelings for you, might be better to refrain from dating her. If you continue to date her knowing that you dont feel passion for her while her feelings grow, you will only be leading her on

Sure. There's a reason why "settling" tends to work in the short and medium term.

But are you under the impression that experiencing "passion" in and of itself is some sort of signal that a "relationship" is successful, or deep, or meaningful, or is guaranteed to provide what you want, will last, or anything of much meaning whatsoever?


I think you were motivated to ask the question for a reason.

Are you experiencing communication from her (direct or indirect) that she expects you to be responding to her with "passion?"
That it's "supposed" to be there in the "relationship?"

Are you relying on "supposed to" or a "script" to determine the relationship and what it means?


What exactly are you annoyed with?
Her? Her behavior? Feeling the need to live up to expectations she is communicating but no motivation to do so, to reciprocate?
Just dating in general and not getting someone to do what you want when you want it without having to tell them?



So are you using strangers on a dating site to sublimate a perceived lacking in her personality?

There you go.
People tend to do that with their opposite sex "just friends."
You can be in a relationship with this woman, and come to us when you need someone to tell you what to do.

Other than that, is she expecting you to have the "take charge personality," which in many cases is expressed through behavior motivated by feelings of "passion" and that's what you're negatively responding to and getting annoyed with?

Every great journey begins with a tiny step.

One things for sure, there’s a lot of relationships that begin with instant attraction and don’t last 5 minutes.

People can grow on you.

All the best mate, whatever you decide.

Nice to say fried zone

1 I felt that like my relationships in the past that i would be excited by a new person. That in the early stages of a relationship there is a lot of passion, desire and excitement. I don’t have that feeling with this new girl. Wasn’t sure if this is something that could come later.

2.Was in a relationship for a long time and now that i am dating again I’m somewhat annoyed with the “ritual”. Just miss having the person that i knew and didn’t have to play all these games to prove I’m trustworthy, etc.

3 when I mentioned take charge. I like women that don’t wait on a man to do things and provide. She is the opposite. Man makes the moves the plans and provides not really what I’m into.

Hope this clears somethings up. As you may tell a lot is on me ad not her. She is a good lady just not what I’m use to...

Are you dating because you think you should be or because you want to be with that person?

Kinda the same question as:

Are you in love or just 'in love' with the idea of being in love?

No probably not.

It sounds like hard work
IMO. If it flows naturally and the CHEMISTRY is there, you are onto a good thing.
I would bail personally.

It's not just America, it's the rest of the world!

I don't think your feelings towards her will change, you clearly like her and enjoy her company, but without any romantic interest on your part nothing will change in my opinion. I would ask yourself, why did you ask this woman for a date in the first place, or agree to a date with her, was it to see if there was anything there, a connection, then you have your answer, there isn't. Much better to move on before she develops feelings for you that you cannot reciprocate.

Welcome to Mingle2 and good luck in whatever you decide to do.

1 It could come, but it sounds to me you simply aren't ready for anything like that to come.

2 That is a typical feeling when you first start dating again. you realise that the familiar and 'knowing what the other wants' has gone and you have to start afresh. Been there too. Meaning you got more work to do on letting go of the old so that you can start enjoying the new. Get to a place where you find pleasure in discovering someone new, who may wake up new aspects in yourself as well, which could be tremendously joyful. An opportunity for growth. But from what you say, you aren't ready yet.
Having been single for a year and a half means nothing. You either are ready or you're not.

3 So she's different from your ex. Is that a problem? Are you looking for an exact copy of your ex because that makes your life easier? Maybe best try to get your ex back!
From what you say this woman wants a man. It is the masculine energy who takes charge, who plans, comes with solutions, arranges things etc. When a man does that, the woman can fill in the 'softer', feeling parts. Yin & Yang.
You're saying you don't want to be that man. You simply want to sit back, do nothing, let her do all the work. So you're Yin, she is Yin. Not gonna work.
Ask if you really aren't like that, cos again it sounds like you're not over your ex --> SHe's not what I'm used to. So you're still looking for someone who's like your ex.

Maybe better let this girl go before she gets too involved and hurt. Work on yourself some more. I'd say keep dating, but not see them more than once so neither party gets involved emotionally, yet it gives you the chance to learn, grow, and let go of expectations. It will help you enjoy exploring the new instead of wanting what used to be.

Speaking as a girl who likes the man to take the lead in the relationship, at least, based on what you wrote here, I would say you are both completely incompatible and the best thing to do is leave before it gets more serious. For me personally, if I were with a guy who was not taking the lead, I would let him go before anything even got started--in fact, nothing would even have gotten started to begin with.

If you want to be passive in a relationship, then maybe you should do what I do, which is just sit back and sift through the offers that come to you. Then you will increase your chances of getting a take-charge female.

you mean intimacy? I guess if you don't have that better be friends... one might me hurt.. better be in friend zone.. no break up no heart ache... but make sure it's clear to her too... if that feeling grow while you're on that zone.. let it be.. but always communicate