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Topic: Multiple marriages and divorces
no photo
Wed 10/10/07 11:46 AM

…me and my inquisitive mind happy

Is this a red flag when you meet someone that have been married and divorced more than twice?

no photo
Wed 10/10/07 11:50 AM
noway I would think so......there has to be a common denominator in the failed marriages......usually the person involved.....or they just like getting married after 2 dates......

Be verrrrrrrrrrrrrry leanoway ry....

Twitch's photo
Wed 10/10/07 11:52 AM
Sin: I'd have to agree with Gypsy on this; multiple marriages and divorces something isn't right there.

freeagent934's photo
Wed 10/10/07 11:54 AM
LOL well the saying goes " 3rd times a charm!"

I would think that they likely have some issues, or they seem to marry the first available person.

So who wants to get married?

I think that living together for a while is best...like 20 years just so that your surelaugh laugh laugh

no photo
Wed 10/10/07 11:55 AM
This is nothing personal just an observation...

shutterbug63's photo
Wed 10/10/07 11:56 AM
Yeah I would have to agree with that. If they got into a second marriage and didn't learn from the first, it could be a red flag. But then you know that many times people have a tendency to chose "Mr Wrong" too many times. So take some time to get to know her first.

no photo
Wed 10/10/07 11:57 AM
I think it would be a red flag, definitely, but not necessarily a deal breaker. I think it just depends on the whys and wherefores and most importantly, whether or not the person has learned anything at all from it. If they haven't, and if they haven't accepted responsibility for their part of the failure of their marriage, that would be a deal breaker.

no photo
Wed 10/10/07 11:59 AM
Years ago a friend online told me his mom married 7x...I teased if she was having a race with Elizabeth Taylor, he just laughed.

Seriously, getting married can't be all that bad but 7x, WOW, that's something else.

LivingByBeats's photo
Wed 10/10/07 11:59 AM
wouldn't that go for the first marriage? what difference would it make if they failed twice over once? what once is ok and twice is taboo?

i think its interesting that all those who haven't been married twice think that its taboo for the people that have been, because well they've only been married once, except for 1 itty bitty little problem....

statistics have proven that over 90% of all third marriages have a lifetime success rate, and that over 75% of second marriages fail if one or the other have been married before...

also, the rate percentage of marriages that occur as a second marraige from a divorce is over 95% so that means, that if any of you get married again, and you fail at it, then according to your own judgments you are no longer to be trusted and incapable of having a relationship...

wonder if you'll wanna wear that same hat when you end up burning yourself... because after all, the authorities in these statistical fields say you'll do it again AND have a 75% chance of failing!

hahaha,

never say what you might do yourself, because your foot will only make your mouth bigger by being shoved in it so much

freeagent934's photo
Wed 10/10/07 12:02 PM
well then my statement of " 3rd times a charm" is correct then

heatherrae's photo
Wed 10/10/07 12:03 PM
as someone who has been married twice, beats, thank u very much. sometimes u just havent found the right one yet.

no photo
Wed 10/10/07 12:03 PM
hahaha where did you get those statistics????? Ive heard the opposite with the amount of marriages.....so by the time the 3rd marriage rolls around......youre pretty much ****ed!!!laugh laugh laugh

Anyone wanna get married???bigsmile

LivingByBeats's photo
Wed 10/10/07 12:04 PM
freeAgent, yup apparantly....
makes me nervous because i'll be on number 2 if i meet anyone, and i'm damn aware of the statistics, so i'm glad i took a long time off between getting my heart broken....

ironically the woman i fell in love with wasn't whom i married/divorced....
i met her afterwards
how's that for irony of the gods?

LivingByBeats's photo
Wed 10/10/07 12:05 PM
you're asking me to prove my statistics? sure :D i was waiting for you to post that i was wrong before i had you shove your foot in your mouth :D

its more fun that way:D

kidatheart70's photo
Wed 10/10/07 12:05 PM
What about people who are in their thirties or forties and have never been married?huh

lilwabbit's photo
Wed 10/10/07 12:07 PM
it depends on the circumstances as to why they got divorced. i wouldnt be getin a divorce if he wasn't a lieing cheating abusive a**hole. and ive done all in my power to try at it. now if its whimsicle marriges that always end the same its different.

freeagent934's photo
Wed 10/10/07 12:08 PM
Ok Gypsy41 I do,

I might as well get number two started right away!

singingmyheartout's photo
Wed 10/10/07 12:10 PM
Depends on circumstances:
I've been married and divorced TWICE.
First guy, I was 19 when we married. Had his kid when I was 20. We were together 2 years when he, at age 23 (2 years older than me), decided to sleep with my brother's 16 year old gf... I decided this was probably a valid reason to terminate the marriage, seeing as how he was a disgusting perv. We were divorced in 2002.

The second marriage, I was 23 years old and 2 months pregnant with his kid when we married. This guy was a year younger. We were married a little over a year and a half, he was abusive. I was injured and unable to work. He liquidated all our assets and took off without warning, leaving me 2 kids and no means to pay bills, etc... seeing as how he vanished, I divorced him in 2005.

Currently, I am 27 years old. I may have made some POOR choices... but I don't think my divorces should reflect negatively on me. Had my exes been upstanding people, I would have stayed with them. Given the circumstances, though, what other option did I have? To stay faithful to liars and cheaters who had no regard for me or their children?

I think you have to take a case by case basis and not judge based on the number of divorces... Afterall, there are always exceptions to the rules...

oldsage's photo
Wed 10/10/07 12:10 PM
Ck the circumstances before judgeing.
You might be dealing with a widow or widower.
Seperation wasn't wanted.

Everything on it's own merit.

no photo
Wed 10/10/07 12:12 PM
LivingByBeats - I am not saying it is not ok.

I was just asking if this is something people should worry when they comes across a case of such? I know I can't put everyone in the same bag ...some divorces are needed but a repetitive behaviour makes you question it.

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