I assume everyone is good until they display a repeated patteren the shows otherwise. One or two misunderstandings or mistakes don't make you a bad person, but if you have a repeated patteren, you may not be some one I wish to associate with.

I don't feel insecure for not having been married. You misunderstood. But, you did answer my question about making assumptions, though, so thanks.

life is built on experience, all decisions are built upon past experience, or 'preexisting' ideas,,, I call it experience though

I wouldnt assume in this age that anyone is 'strictly' hetero or homosexual, in fact I Suspect noone is 'born' that way, but that they develop what is truly a 'preference' on one side or another

I would probably assume someone putting EFFORT into making people laugh(for free), enjoys doing it or there would be little reason to make the effort

I assume most healthy adults are capable of having sex, though that is not one I would have truly thought about until this thread, cause its not a major significance to me,,,lol

I take Mingle for what it is. You can tell a good bit about who a person is by reading what they write. However, it also takes more than that to truly "know" someone. For instance....

I assume that Torgo knows a good bit about movies cause he has shown in his posts his love for them (especially horror films). I assume that Mariah will post questions on here cause she turly loves to hear what others have to say about varrying topics. I assume that Eileen and The Captain will be together forever cause it feels like they have been since I joined this site. I assume LOVE2ROCKNROLL (sorry if I didn't get it spelled right, lol) will type the title's of her threads in ALL CAPS (cause that is just how she rolls).

However.....while I do know them on here, I don't "know" them completely. I believe these are good people, and therefore I assume them to be that way. I'm sure people either love or not love me. Assume I am this or that. But I also know that only a few here "know" me.

As for the comment of being 33 and never been married. Well, years ago that was weird. But in today's world, it isn't strange. I don't know why people feel you have to be married (or have been), have to have children (some people just do not want kids or can't) and have to be settled in your life. IMO...we have evolved from that. Sure. Get married in your twenties, have a family, and a good career..if you want all those things. If not, do what you want to do. Lesson...don't assume that what is right for some is right for all.

I guess I don't really feel like they're assumptions if someone has made it clear they're really into horror movies, or they type subject lines in all caps, or like me, they ask lots of questions. Those are things I would expect people to know. And I don't think that knowing these things through the forum mean you actually know someone.

Absolbloodylutely i do...and those who say they don't are full of shite. Tis human nature to pass judgement on people...i've just become less interested over time

True. But the guy asking what was wrong with you cause you are at an age that you should have been married is an assumption. Or maybe it is more of a judgment?

I assume nothing. I don't even remember who said what most of the time.

I'd say it could be both. An assumption that something must be wrong if I hadn't been married by now and judging based on someone having not been married by the age he thought people should be married by.

I do make assumptions often not about a persons character. But on what will work, is someone who's profile says sex is extremely important to her going to want to date an abstinent Christian guy? Not likely!

So ya I do make assumptions but only logical ones. I'd rather get to know someone without assuming to much.

Also when I see Rachel Bilson on Plenty Of Fish or Cobie Smulders yes I assume that neither Rachel or Cobie are on Plenty of Fish only 5 km away from me lol.

Sadly online you need to make some assumptions. Other wise your going to get abused and lied to!

A women who was nineteen claimed to be a widow from a marriage that went seven years and had a degree from a University. So how did a 19 year old girl get a four year masters degree and when did she get married, 14?

Ya sorry I'm going to have to assume she's full of crap!
Or the women who said she was 20 but her pictures were of a women who must have been in her 60's. Either those pictures were not of her or she's full of crap in her profile!

Even my profile people are going to assume due to my weight in a picture that I'm lazy and eat unhealthy. What they don't know is I've lost over a hundred pounds since the picture was taken and I am purposely misrepresenting myself to get rid of the assumers lol.

So when online you need to assume but also you need to not jump to illogical conclusions!

Give someone the benefit of the doubt if their is any chance they are telling the truth and any chance your misreading them!

You're talking about people that lie in their profiles, yet you're purposefully misrepresenting yourself to get rid of people who assume? Strange way to go about things.

I try not to judge people but there are a few people that have wrote things and I just get the feeling that they think they are a little bit smarter then anyone else on here. I get annoyed easily with this person so I just ignore them or there has been a time or two when I came back with a snotty remark. I figure I don't know them and they don't know me so why is this person judging anyone...there really is no need.
If someone judges you for not being married...I say you are the smart one, you have taken your time and you won't settle for something that you don't want!! Any more I don't care what people think about me...they can judge me because not to many people in here know me. I say live your life and I will live mine

Sometimes people think I reply with snotty remarks when that has not been what was intended. Sometimes, it's them reading into what I've written. So, maybe the person who bothers you is the same? Who knows.

The married thing was just an example. If someone has an issue with me not having been married by my early 30s, that's their problem, not mine. But thank you!

Hmmm. I am 42 and have never been married and I don't assume it's because there's something wrong with me...I know it for a fact!

I personally try not to make any assumptions about anyone, especially in this venue because anybody can portray him/herself to be whomever they want on a computer. I believe you can't truly know someone until you meet in person and look into their eyes. Therein lies the truth in my opinion.

I try not to, but honestly I catch myself doing it more often than I like to admit to. But I also oftentimes get the impression some people want others to assume certain things about them, whether or not they are true and even possibly without realizing they are doing it.

How does someone try to get others to assume certain things about them without realizing they're doing it?

I think it's just human nature. Forming opinions on others is a social action based on the information available at the time. That said, a persons perception is often based on their own feelings, experiences or agenda's. So an assumption should simply be a preliminary idea. If a relationship is to have substance, it has to go deeper than this initial ideal. That takes time and interaction.

I don't assume anything of anyone. I posted a question the other day and someone assumed it pertained to me, which it had nothing to do with me. It was just something I was curious about.

So no, I don't assume. I prefer to get to know the person.

I think I probably make assumptions about a few people because I have read a lot of their posts and even corresponded privately with many. But I try to factor in the fact that is still very limited and maybe even editied view so most assumptions could get my responses or ideas about them. Nothing is going to be has important as meeting them and seeing them in action.

I get a lot of my opions about people not just from what they say or do but how my life experience factors into it.

When I respond to people it is usually from what they put in a specific thread. Too many people to try and keep everyone straight

It seems that someone dogging on you for being 33 and unmarried it is more his problems or perseptions than you having a "flaw". I chose to marry young and do the Wife Mommy thing but don't see it as the way life "SHOULD" be lived just because it is what I wanted.

Maybe he assumed what I would which is at 33 you probably have had at least one relationship and was just not polite enough to respect your privacy. Sad because it seems pretty rude.