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Topic: Exclusive?
msharmony's photo
Wed 04/18/12 02:13 PM
When does something become exclusive?

How do you know?

Is there an assumption or is it something to be discussed and mutually agreed upon?

If you are 'dating' someone, do you know or care whether they are also dating others?

would it cause jealousy or problems if someone that was 'dating' you, that you were developing feelings for, was dating others as well?

How would you discuss it,, ,,,how would you bring it up?



,,,I imagine I will have to tackle dating eventually, but its new to me because I Was always someones 'wife' and the commitment is important to me.


Just looking for some opinions and I know this is where to find them....lol

TxsGal3333's photo
Wed 04/18/12 02:16 PM
If I meet someone and we start dating. I'm very up front that if they want to date me it's me and not half the neighborhood.....I don't share well at all...noway noway

So I make that very clear by no later then the 3rd date. For if they have made it that far there must be something that attracts them to me...

no photo
Wed 04/18/12 02:18 PM
lolol...I dont share either...Kind of get this Dont Fock With My Shitz attitude...but only if we were exclusive.:angel:

soufiehere's photo
Wed 04/18/12 02:29 PM
Hmmm.
Always exclusive.
From the beginning.
That is me.
But he?
He had better be.
I have no interest in being
anyone's second choice.

I think, if someone cannot commit totally
to one relationship, they ought to be let go.
To find someone else, whom they could love that way.

lookin4home's photo
Wed 04/18/12 02:32 PM
Edited by lookin4home on Wed 04/18/12 02:35 PM

When does something become exclusive?

How do you know?

Is there an assumption or is it something to be discussed and mutually agreed upon?

If you are 'dating' someone, do you know or care whether they are also dating others?

would it cause jealousy or problems if someone that was 'dating' you, that you were developing feelings for, was dating others as well?

How would you discuss it,, ,,,how would you bring it up?



,,,I imagine I will have to tackle dating eventually, but its new to me because I Was always someones 'wife' and the commitment is important to me.


Just looking for some opinions and I know this is where to find them....lol


Good questions. I've wondered this myself. I'll just have to give you my view, I don't know how it works with others. In the world of internet dating, I don't mind if someone is testing the waters with multiple people. For me, even if I'm talking to 3 girls at once, one will stick out more than the rest. Once that happens, I tend to focus more on her and let the others slowly fade out. If I'm really that interested, I will become exclusive on my own. By the time of a 3rd date I expect them to have made the same decision and either let me fade out or be exclusive. If they haven't made a decision by then, I assume they aren't that interested.

Edit: This is all based on lack of sexual relations. Once you hit that point you should already be exclusive, imo.

lilott's photo
Wed 04/18/12 02:38 PM
Who cares?

josie68's photo
Wed 04/18/12 02:57 PM
I have no idea how you know.
Personally I couldn't muck around with 2 people at once, I would have to concentrate on one.
and I would hope the same, if he didnt feel like that I would just figure he wasnt interested in me..

no photo
Wed 04/18/12 03:06 PM

When does something become exclusive?

How do you know?

Is there an assumption or is it something to be discussed and mutually agreed upon?

If you are 'dating' someone, do you know or care whether they are also dating others?

would it cause jealousy or problems if someone that was 'dating' you, that you were developing feelings for, was dating others as well?

How would you discuss it,, ,,,how would you bring it up?



,,,I imagine I will have to tackle dating eventually, but its new to me because I Was always someones 'wife' and the commitment is important to me.


Just looking for some opinions and I know this is where to find them....lol


You know when you discuss it with the person you're dating and you both agree.

no photo
Wed 04/18/12 03:13 PM

Hmmm.
Always exclusive.
From the beginning.

That is me.
But he?
He had better be.
I have no interest in being
anyone's second choice.

I think, if someone cannot commit totally
to one relationship, they ought to be let go.
To find someone else, whom they could love that way.


I agree

no photo
Wed 04/18/12 03:33 PM

Hmmm.
Always exclusive.
From the beginning.
That is me.
But he?
He had better be.
I have no interest in being
anyone's second choice.

I think, if someone cannot commit totally
to one relationship, they ought to be let go.
To find someone else, whom they could love that way.


I would never just assume things were exclusive from the beginning. One date doesn't equal a relationship. A relationship would have to involve actually getting to know each other, seeing how compatible we are and lots of communication.

no photo
Wed 04/18/12 03:33 PM
Something we would have to work out as we went along, but my realistic expectation would be when we could officially call ourselves as "together".


no photo
Wed 04/18/12 07:00 PM

When does something become exclusive?

How do you know?

Is there an assumption or is it something to be discussed and mutually agreed upon?

If you are 'dating' someone, do you know or care whether they are also dating others?

would it cause jealousy or problems if someone that was 'dating' you, that you were developing feelings for, was dating others as well?

How would you discuss it,, ,,,how would you bring it up?



It would never be an assumption and would most certainly be discussed and mutually agreed upon by both sides.
I think it would naturally come up in discussion as the relationship progressed and certainly wouldn't be a taboo subject at that point or it wouldn't have made it that far ~ for me.

But what do I know? I don't date. :smile:


Ruth34611's photo
Wed 04/18/12 07:19 PM


Hmmm.
Always exclusive.
From the beginning.

That is me.
But he?
He had better be.
I have no interest in being
anyone's second choice.

I think, if someone cannot commit totally
to one relationship, they ought to be let go.
To find someone else, whom they could love that way.


I agree


Me too.


HeadnHeart's photo
Wed 04/18/12 07:36 PM


When does something become exclusive?

How do you know?

Is there an assumption or is it something to be discussed and mutually agreed upon?

If you are 'dating' someone, do you know or care whether they are also dating others?

would it cause jealousy or problems if someone that was 'dating' you, that you were developing feelings for, was dating others as well?

How would you discuss it,, ,,,how would you bring it up?



It would never be an assumption and would most certainly be discussed and mutually agreed upon by both sides.
I think it would naturally come up in discussion as the relationship progressed and certainly wouldn't be a taboo subject at that point or it wouldn't have made it that far ~ for me.

But what do I know? I don't date. :smile:




Wise answer, ^

Most likely I would have already asked about their expectations and style of dating, without pressuring them into anything. Natural is really important to me, as both should feel it build somewhat simultaneously if the chemistry is clicking.

MariahsFantasy's photo
Wed 04/18/12 07:38 PM



Hmmm.
Always exclusive.
From the beginning.

That is me.
But he?
He had better be.
I have no interest in being
anyone's second choice.

I think, if someone cannot commit totally
to one relationship, they ought to be let go.
To find someone else, whom they could love that way.


I agree


Me too.




:thumbsup: I assume the rug doesn't get pulled out from under me.

oldhippie1952's photo
Wed 04/18/12 07:46 PM
I don't go exclusive until we pass the dating stage. Until then, it's just like high school.

MariahsFantasy's photo
Wed 04/18/12 07:54 PM

I don't go exclusive until we pass the dating stage. Until then, it's just like high school.


I wish dating could be like it was in the 50s. The sort of "birth of the teenager age." Back then the sexes weren't as confusing as now.

krupa's photo
Wed 04/18/12 08:00 PM
You know damned well when something is exclusive MsHarmony.

We all know when wrong is just wrong. (but, it is hard to convince a person in love that posessiveness is a bad trait

I see it more in the context of "Am I more loyal or do I just go with convenience?" I am more loyal though most people go with what's easiest.


markc48's photo
Wed 04/18/12 08:13 PM
Isn't loyal the easist?

Totage's photo
Wed 04/18/12 08:20 PM

When does something become exclusive?

How do you know?

Is there an assumption or is it something to be discussed and mutually agreed upon?

If you are 'dating' someone, do you know or care whether they are also dating others?

would it cause jealousy or problems if someone that was 'dating' you, that you were developing feelings for, was dating others as well?

How would you discuss it,, ,,,how would you bring it up?



,,,I imagine I will have to tackle dating eventually, but its new to me because I Was always someones 'wife' and the commitment is important to me.


Just looking for some opinions and I know this is where to find them....lol


I always let them know I only talk to one person at a time, but don't care if they do the same or not until we get more serious then we discuss it and agree or not.


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