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| Topic: Guys have it tough... | |
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Nope. :)
I'm very much taken. I tried to work it out with my ex, over a year and a half.. Still. I went to the concert recently. Worked security. My boss asked me to keep an eye on the photographer as she took pictures from the corner of the stage. When everyone began to to pile on the stage, I grabbed her from getting trampled.. She thanked me on my old facebook page. Tell me how that translated to me f***ing her. We're not even together anymore.. ..and she still does it. So, no, if I think it is worth pursuing.. I pursue it will all I am.. |
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from what I have observed among friends family and self where there are marriages of many many years is that both partners will move mountains to help each other heal Exactly.. So if you really, really, really, like her/him.. Is it not being overly hypocritical to simply say: "You are not worth it. I'm moving on." ? I can't imagine telling someone who I love that they are not "worth it" deciding to live apart can occur for many reasons but not because (my or your) partner is not "worth it" IDK if it's hypocritical but it is certainly mean spirited - if they "aren't worth it" then what are you doing together in the first place, would be my question at some point the person we are helping to heal has to show some progress If I love someone and my issues are making him miserable, what does he owe me? to me, these are answers that are up to the couple and there are no set right & wrong answers I absolutely agree. But. What I'm trying to point out is.. You both said that, not me. "Aren't worth it" may not have been your exact words. But if someone gives up on you, is it not the same feeling you'd have been left in their absence? Granted if nothing changes in like what's reasonable? 6 months? A year? Depends I guess on how much you care and are willing to pursue it, then yeah, that would be expected, if not acceptable to leave then.. *sigh* lol I am sorry to be such a pudding-head but I'm afraid I don't understand I don;t see what I said that is analogous to someone not being "worth it" (with "it" being the effort to help heal) I did say that no one should have to live with continued unsubstantiated acusations - but not because they aren't "worth it" but because sometimes a person's issues are too large for us, sometimes our partner needs more help than what we can give as individuals sometimes these kinds of issues - depending on the nature of the issues- can become very overwhelming to the support partner Still before going any further I want to make sure that I understand what you are saying - as I didn't realize that I had said that some one is not worth it, or anything like that. Perhaps that needs some clarification |
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from what I have observed among friends family and self where there are marriages of many many years is that both partners will move mountains to help each other heal Exactly.. So if you really, really, really, like her/him.. Is it not being overly hypocritical to simply say: "You are not worth it. I'm moving on." ? I can't imagine telling someone who I love that they are not "worth it" deciding to live apart can occur for many reasons but not because (my or your) partner is not "worth it" IDK if it's hypocritical but it is certainly mean spirited - if they "aren't worth it" then what are you doing together in the first place, would be my question at some point the person we are helping to heal has to show some progress If I love someone and my issues are making him miserable, what does he owe me? to me, these are answers that are up to the couple and there are no set right & wrong answers I absolutely agree. But. What I'm trying to point out is.. You both said that, not me. "Aren't worth it" may not have been your exact words. But if someone gives up on you, is it not the same feeling you'd have been left in their absence? Granted if nothing changes in like what's reasonable? 6 months? A year? Depends I guess on how much you care and are willing to pursue it, then yeah, that would be expected, if not acceptable to leave then.. *sigh* lol I am sorry to be such a pudding-head but I'm afraid I don't understand I don;t see what I said that is analogous to someone not being "worth it" (with "it" being the effort to help heal) I did say that no one should have to live with continued unsubstantiated acusations - but not because they aren't "worth it" but because sometimes a person's issues are too large for us, sometimes our partner needs more help than what we can give as individuals sometimes these kinds of issues - depending on the nature of the issues- can become very overwhelming to the support partner Still before going any further I want to make sure that I understand what you are saying - as I didn't realize that I had said that some one is not worth it, or anything like that. Perhaps that needs some clarification I was trying to say.. That neither you nor Goof actually 'said' those words. Only implied it. And, further more, it wasn't you who actually implied it more; it was Goof, but you 'agreed completely'. I didn't mean they 'aren't actually worth it'; I was just trying to express that's how it comes off. i.e. Giving up - Not worth the pursuit. i.e. Just move on - Giving up. Does that express it better? It started with the bold. I translated it to the above, through that sequence. Again, I wasn't arguing.. I'm just stating that Goof's idea of 'this is how it is' doesn't fit all situations. >.> Which led to my original question.. *sigh* Man, now I'm confusing myself! x.x |
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from what I have observed among friends family and self where there are marriages of many many years is that both partners will move mountains to help each other heal Exactly.. So if you really, really, really, like her/him.. Is it not being overly hypocritical to simply say: "You are not worth it. I'm moving on." ? I can't imagine telling someone who I love that they are not "worth it" deciding to live apart can occur for many reasons but not because (my or your) partner is not "worth it" IDK if it's hypocritical but it is certainly mean spirited - if they "aren't worth it" then what are you doing together in the first place, would be my question at some point the person we are helping to heal has to show some progress If I love someone and my issues are making him miserable, what does he owe me? to me, these are answers that are up to the couple and there are no set right & wrong answers I absolutely agree. But. What I'm trying to point out is.. You both said that, not me. "Aren't worth it" may not have been your exact words. But if someone gives up on you, is it not the same feeling you'd have been left in their absence? Granted if nothing changes in like what's reasonable? 6 months? A year? Depends I guess on how much you care and are willing to pursue it, then yeah, that would be expected, if not acceptable to leave then.. *sigh* lol I am sorry to be such a pudding-head but I'm afraid I don't understand I don;t see what I said that is analogous to someone not being "worth it" (with "it" being the effort to help heal) I did say that no one should have to live with continued unsubstantiated acusations - but not because they aren't "worth it" but because sometimes a person's issues are too large for us, sometimes our partner needs more help than what we can give as individuals sometimes these kinds of issues - depending on the nature of the issues- can become very overwhelming to the support partner Still before going any further I want to make sure that I understand what you are saying - as I didn't realize that I had said that some one is not worth it, or anything like that. Perhaps that needs some clarification I was trying to say.. That neither you nor Goof actually 'said' those words. Only implied it. And, further more, it wasn't you who actually implied it more; it was Goof, but you 'agreed completely'. I didn't mean they 'aren't actually worth it'; I was just trying to express that's how it comes off. i.e. Giving up - Not worth the pursuit. i.e. Just move on - Giving up. Does that express it better? It started with the bold. I translated it to the above, through that sequence. Again, I wasn't arguing.. I'm just stating that Goof's idea of 'this is how it is' doesn't fit all situations. >.> Which led to my original question.. *sigh* Man, now I'm confusing myself! x.x yes you are apparently confused - no prob tho I never said I agreed completely with Goof nor was it implied - tho I do agree with a few things he said in his 2nd post it was navygirl and sing who were in agreement with goof goof & I are buds & I genuinely like him from here, but we are seldom in complete agreement - so I was kinda surprised when u said that and once again, yes, I do not agree with the idea that there is a set of fixes or right answers that can be plugged in - "this is how it is" might apply to Thursday's weather - but not human relationships = they are as dynamic and varied as the people they involve so the truisms may in fact be true sometimes, but often as not they are way off base I think some folks need the closure provided by truisms |
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Nope. :) I'm very much taken. I tried to work it out with my ex, over a year and a half.. Still. I went to the concert recently. Worked security. My boss asked me to keep an eye on the photographer as she took pictures from the corner of the stage. When everyone began to to pile on the stage, I grabbed her from getting trampled.. She thanked me on my old facebook page. Tell me how that translated to me f***ing her. We're not even together anymore.. ..and she still does it. So, no, if I think it is worth pursuing.. I pursue it will all I am.. Well there you go. You tried to work it out with an ex and it didn't work. How do you know others don't try to work things out before moving on? |
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from what I have observed among friends family and self where there are marriages of many many years is that both partners will move mountains to help each other heal Exactly.. So if you really, really, really, like her/him.. Is it not being overly hypocritical to simply say: "You are not worth it. I'm moving on." ? I can't imagine telling someone who I love that they are not "worth it" deciding to live apart can occur for many reasons but not because (my or your) partner is not "worth it" IDK if it's hypocritical but it is certainly mean spirited - if they "aren't worth it" then what are you doing together in the first place, would be my question at some point the person we are helping to heal has to show some progress If I love someone and my issues are making him miserable, what does he owe me? to me, these are answers that are up to the couple and there are no set right & wrong answers I absolutely agree. But. What I'm trying to point out is.. You both said that, not me. "Aren't worth it" may not have been your exact words. But if someone gives up on you, is it not the same feeling you'd have been left in their absence? Granted if nothing changes in like what's reasonable? 6 months? A year? Depends I guess on how much you care and are willing to pursue it, then yeah, that would be expected, if not acceptable to leave then.. *sigh* lol I am sorry to be such a pudding-head but I'm afraid I don't understand I don;t see what I said that is analogous to someone not being "worth it" (with "it" being the effort to help heal) I did say that no one should have to live with continued unsubstantiated acusations - but not because they aren't "worth it" but because sometimes a person's issues are too large for us, sometimes our partner needs more help than what we can give as individuals sometimes these kinds of issues - depending on the nature of the issues- can become very overwhelming to the support partner Still before going any further I want to make sure that I understand what you are saying - as I didn't realize that I had said that some one is not worth it, or anything like that. Perhaps that needs some clarification I was trying to say.. That neither you nor Goof actually 'said' those words. Only implied it. And, further more, it wasn't you who actually implied it more; it was Goof, but you 'agreed completely'. I didn't mean they 'aren't actually worth it'; I was just trying to express that's how it comes off. i.e. Giving up - Not worth the pursuit. i.e. Just move on - Giving up. Does that express it better? It started with the bold. I translated it to the above, through that sequence. Again, I wasn't arguing.. I'm just stating that Goof's idea of 'this is how it is' doesn't fit all situations. >.> Which led to my original question.. *sigh* Man, now I'm confusing myself! x.x yes you are apparently confused - no prob tho I never said I agreed completely with Goof nor was it implied - tho I do agree with a few things he said in his 2nd post it was navygirl and sing who were in agreement with goof goof & I are buds & I genuinely like him from here, but we are seldom in complete agreement - so I was kinda surprised when u said that and once again, yes, I do not agree with the idea that there is a set of fixes or right answers that can be plugged in - "this is how it is" might apply to Thursday's weather - but not human relationships = they are as dynamic and varied as the people they involve so the truisms may in fact be true sometimes, but often as not they are way off base I think some folks need the closure provided by truisms Wait... WTH!? There's two sweets?! No wonder I'm getting confused. x.x |
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Well there you go. You tried to work it out with an ex and it didn't work. How do you know others don't try to work things out before moving on? Not saying they don't.. Cause that wasn't the original intention of my statement. I was just specifying that using his idea-- Wait.. wth was my point now? D: I'm lost. >.> I just know I wasn't implying that no one doesn't try to work things out... Just stating that 'moving on' i.e. 'giving up' isn't always the best course of action either. That's all. To each their own or whatever.. I'm just saying.. Giving up should only be used when change or progress isn't taking place. |
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from what I have observed among friends family and self where there are marriages of many many years is that both partners will move mountains to help each other heal Exactly.. So if you really, really, really, like her/him.. Is it not being overly hypocritical to simply say: "You are not worth it. I'm moving on." ? I can't imagine telling someone who I love that they are not "worth it" deciding to live apart can occur for many reasons but not because (my or your) partner is not "worth it" IDK if it's hypocritical but it is certainly mean spirited - if they "aren't worth it" then what are you doing together in the first place, would be my question at some point the person we are helping to heal has to show some progress If I love someone and my issues are making him miserable, what does he owe me? to me, these are answers that are up to the couple and there are no set right & wrong answers I absolutely agree. But. What I'm trying to point out is.. You both said that, not me. "Aren't worth it" may not have been your exact words. But if someone gives up on you, is it not the same feeling you'd have been left in their absence? Granted if nothing changes in like what's reasonable? 6 months? A year? Depends I guess on how much you care and are willing to pursue it, then yeah, that would be expected, if not acceptable to leave then.. *sigh* lol I am sorry to be such a pudding-head but I'm afraid I don't understand I don;t see what I said that is analogous to someone not being "worth it" (with "it" being the effort to help heal) I did say that no one should have to live with continued unsubstantiated acusations - but not because they aren't "worth it" but because sometimes a person's issues are too large for us, sometimes our partner needs more help than what we can give as individuals sometimes these kinds of issues - depending on the nature of the issues- can become very overwhelming to the support partner Still before going any further I want to make sure that I understand what you are saying - as I didn't realize that I had said that some one is not worth it, or anything like that. Perhaps that needs some clarification I was trying to say.. That neither you nor Goof actually 'said' those words. Only implied it. And, further more, it wasn't you who actually implied it more; it was Goof, but you 'agreed completely'. I didn't mean they 'aren't actually worth it'; I was just trying to express that's how it comes off. i.e. Giving up - Not worth the pursuit. i.e. Just move on - Giving up. Does that express it better? It started with the bold. I translated it to the above, through that sequence. Again, I wasn't arguing.. I'm just stating that Goof's idea of 'this is how it is' doesn't fit all situations. >.> Which led to my original question.. *sigh* Man, now I'm confusing myself! x.x yes you are apparently confused - no prob tho I never said I agreed completely with Goof nor was it implied - tho I do agree with a few things he said in his 2nd post it was navygirl and sing who were in agreement with goof goof & I are buds & I genuinely like him from here, but we are seldom in complete agreement - so I was kinda surprised when u said that and once again, yes, I do not agree with the idea that there is a set of fixes or right answers that can be plugged in - "this is how it is" might apply to Thursday's weather - but not human relationships = they are as dynamic and varied as the people they involve so the truisms may in fact be true sometimes, but often as not they are way off base I think some folks need the closure provided by truisms Wait... WTH!? There's two sweets?! No wonder I'm getting confused. x.x  we are different people but we both have the word sweet in our names (and we are both sweet, of course) I posted a quote for u in the quote thread 
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we are different people but we both have the word sweet in our names (and we are both sweet, of course) I posted a quote for u in the quote thread LoL Agreed. :) Now I know why I was like.. Wth you talking about? You just said.. Ha! A quote..? For me...?? Oh, this I gotta see. :D |
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"It's harder to be with a GOOD woman after she's been with a BAD man." This got me thinking that it's pretty hard to be a man. Since Adam, they've always had to pay for someone else's mistakes. "It's unfair being a man. When my wife is pregnant, everybody rubs her tummy and says 'Congratulations' but nobody rubs my balls and says, 'Good job'." .... Lol. If you're a guy and have loved a woman who has been hurt before and stuck by her, good on you!!! People just don't appreciate good men these days. I wouldn't call my ex a bad woman. She was a good mother and still is. The woman I married after her had some bad men according to her. It was easier for both of us because part of finding the right one is knowing what you don't want as well finding out what you do want. We latched onto each other like magnets and didn't let go. Even when she passed away my mother had to help me let go of her. We were the best of friends and lovers. I was so attracted to her that her younger daughter and me were at odds because she really loved her, too. Her older boy who was like a clown like me hit it off real well. He knew I loved her much as he did. Her next older son and me got along real well. And the oldest daughter and me got along together real good. We helped each other through the grief with the passing. It is just so much more wonderful when the person you are in love with is your best friend. |
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Well there you go. You tried to work it out with an ex and it didn't work. How do you know others don't try to work things out before moving on? Not saying they don't.. Cause that wasn't the original intention of my statement. I was just specifying that using his idea-- Wait.. wth was my point now? D: I'm lost. >.> I just know I wasn't implying that no one doesn't try to work things out... Just stating that 'moving on' i.e. 'giving up' isn't always the best course of action either. That's all. To each their own or whatever.. I'm just saying.. Giving up should only be used when change or progress isn't taking place. If you try to work things out and it doesn't work, what do you do? You move on. Saying it in a different way does not make it different. |
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we are different people but we both have the word sweet in our names (and we are both sweet, of course) I posted a quote for u in the quote thread LoL Agreed. :) Now I know why I was like.. Wth you talking about? You just said.. Ha! A quote..? For me...?? Oh, this I gotta see. :D were you expecting something horrid? |
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If you try to work things out and it doesn't work, what do you do? You move on. Saying it in a different way does not make it different. So giving up today, over giving up ten years from now.. That's the same? By definition of 'giving up', yes, but not in same aspect. Giving up without trying - Quitter. Giving up after trying - Failure. Same words, different meanings.. Somewhat. >.> |
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If you try to work things out and it doesn't work, what do you do? You move on. Saying it in a different way does not make it different. So giving up today, over giving up ten years from now.. That's the same? By definition of 'giving up', yes, but not in same aspect. Giving up without trying - Quitter. Giving up after trying - Failure. Same words, different meanings.. Somewhat. >.> You've been saying the same thing I have, but rewording it. Either way, we're talking about the same thing. |
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If you try to work things out and it doesn't work, what do you do? You move on. Saying it in a different way does not make it different. So giving up today, over giving up ten years from now.. That's the same? By definition of 'giving up', yes, but not in same aspect. Giving up without trying - Quitter. Giving up after trying - Failure. Same words, different meanings.. Somewhat. >.> You've been saying the same thing I have, but rewording it. Either way, we're talking about the same thing. I been saying that too! lol >.> |
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Ok!
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Bottom line to this topic....Goof is all knowing and always right! Now...back to our regularly scheduled programs.
 
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Uh-oh..
I wrote beneath the bottom line. :O |
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Bottom line to this topic....Goof is all knowing and always right! Now...back to our regularly scheduled programs. are u wearing a woman's hat? |
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Bottom line to this topic....Goof is all knowing and always right! Now...back to our regularly scheduled programs. are u wearing a woman's hat? The heat is gender neutral! Get with the times man. 
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