Topic: Couple Asked to Reverse Pro-Gay Marriage Shirt
Chazster's photo
Sun 07/31/11 05:49 PM
Edited by Chazster on Sun 07/31/11 05:50 PM


the APA and DSM say its not a choice?

interesting,, never read that before,,


except when it was still considered an 'illness',,(illnesses arent usually thought of as a choice)


Yes, the APA says it's not a choice. A quote from their website:


Is sexual orientation a choice?

No, human beings cannot choose to be either gay or straight. For most people, sexual orientation emerges in early adolescence without any prior sexual experience. Although we can choose whether to act on our feelings, psychologists do not consider sexual orientation to be a conscious choice that can be voluntarily changed.



Read it here:

http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/sexual-orientation.aspx

You often defend the religious viewpoint of issues here, and part and parcel to that viewpoint is that it HAS to be a choice because morality is based upon choice. Take 'choice' out the equation, and you... don't have an equation.

I think you also well know that when it was considered an illness, relgious people used that pronouncement to institutionalize people.

Either way, many religious people have never given up trying to 'cure' homosexuals, to get them to 'choose' heterosexuality or if that doesn't work, complete abstinence.

One need only look at how badly projects like 'Exodus' have failed to see that it just doesn't work well.

I mean really, would YOU yourself want to take a chance on marrying a man who had a past of being openly gay? If religion is the cure, why did a certain pastor stray from his wife?


-Kerry O.



Being sexually attracted to the same gender is not a choice. Being in a relationship with someone no matter what the gender is is a choice. If they are in a gay relationship that is their choice. There are also gay people who chose to not go that road and marry someone of the opposite gender. That too is their choice.

msharmony's photo
Sun 07/31/11 06:03 PM
distinguishing words 'conscious choice'


there are conscious and subconscious choice,, but they are still choice

subconscious choices just are harder to pinpoint when it comes to their 'origin'

,,, example

hamburger or big mac (conscious choice)

gluttonous eating (subconscious choice) , because the food represents something that you have learned to associate with a desired feeling or emotion,,,etc,,

Dragoness's photo
Sun 07/31/11 06:20 PM



the APA and DSM say its not a choice?

interesting,, never read that before,,


except when it was still considered an 'illness',,(illnesses arent usually thought of as a choice)


Yes, the APA says it's not a choice. A quote from their website:


Is sexual orientation a choice?

No, human beings cannot choose to be either gay or straight. For most people, sexual orientation emerges in early adolescence without any prior sexual experience. Although we can choose whether to act on our feelings, psychologists do not consider sexual orientation to be a conscious choice that can be voluntarily changed.



Read it here:

http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/sexual-orientation.aspx

You often defend the religious viewpoint of issues here, and part and parcel to that viewpoint is that it HAS to be a choice because morality is based upon choice. Take 'choice' out the equation, and you... don't have an equation.

I think you also well know that when it was considered an illness, relgious people used that pronouncement to institutionalize people.

Either way, many religious people have never given up trying to 'cure' homosexuals, to get them to 'choose' heterosexuality or if that doesn't work, complete abstinence.

One need only look at how badly projects like 'Exodus' have failed to see that it just doesn't work well.

I mean really, would YOU yourself want to take a chance on marrying a man who had a past of being openly gay? If religion is the cure, why did a certain pastor stray from his wife?


-Kerry O.



Being sexually attracted to the same gender is not a choice. Being in a relationship with someone no matter what the gender is is a choice. If they are in a gay relationship that is their choice. There are also gay people who chose to not go that road and marry someone of the opposite gender. That too is their choice.


What a miserable choice to have to make just to please others all your life.

There is no way that a gay person should marry someone of the opposite sex and live a lie, It is wrong on all levels.

Chazster's photo
Sun 07/31/11 06:55 PM




What a miserable choice to have to make just to please others all your life.

There is no way that a gay person should marry someone of the opposite sex and live a lie, It is wrong on all levels.


I never said what they should or shouldn't do. I was merely saying its their choice. Who are you to say they shouldn't marry the opposite sex if that is what they want? I am saying no matter if you or gay or not your relationship is your choice.

Dict8's photo
Sun 07/31/11 06:58 PM
Ridiculous! Last I checked.....there is no country called "Dollywood"........

:tongue:

Dragoness's photo
Sun 07/31/11 07:18 PM





What a miserable choice to have to make just to please others all your life.

There is no way that a gay person should marry someone of the opposite sex and live a lie, It is wrong on all levels.


I never said what they should or shouldn't do. I was merely saying its their choice. Who are you to say they shouldn't marry the opposite sex if that is what they want? I am saying no matter if you or gay or not your relationship is your choice.


Do you realize how many women have been infected with HIV because their husband was gay but felt he had to marry the opposite sex? Too many. Being on the DL is not respecting your wife or husband.

It is wrong to do it. The reasons behind their choices are actually more important than their choice is. The reason of hearing from the bible thumpers how they are wrong which is false but causes so much misery.

Luckily in these situations the children can be prevented from contracting HIV from the mother.

willing2's photo
Sun 07/31/11 07:41 PM

I never said what they should or shouldn't do. I was merely saying its their choice. Who are you to say they shouldn't marry the opposite sex if that is what they want? I am saying no matter if you or gay or not your relationship is your choice.

Just like straight folks who adhere to God's word.
If, they aren't married, they stay away from sexual relations til they are married.
A homosexual who knows and practices God's word can stay homosexual and could "make the choice" to never enter into same-sex relations.

Chazster's photo
Sun 07/31/11 07:46 PM






What a miserable choice to have to make just to please others all your life.

There is no way that a gay person should marry someone of the opposite sex and live a lie, It is wrong on all levels.


I never said what they should or shouldn't do. I was merely saying its their choice. Who are you to say they shouldn't marry the opposite sex if that is what they want? I am saying no matter if you or gay or not your relationship is your choice.


Do you realize how many women have been infected with HIV because their husband was gay but felt he had to marry the opposite sex? Too many. Being on the DL is not respecting your wife or husband.

It is wrong to do it. The reasons behind their choices are actually more important than their choice is. The reason of hearing from the bible thumpers how they are wrong which is false but causes so much misery.

Luckily in these situations the children can be prevented from contracting HIV from the mother.

Now you are assuming they are having sex on the dl. I am not saying they are doing that. You are trying to change this argument into something it isnt. I am only saying a relationship is a choice. Do you disagree with that? Do you know anyone whose significant other "made" the other person date them?

Yes willing makes a good point. Some gay people are very religious and chose that lifestyle to follow their religion. Again that is their own choice to make.

no photo
Sun 07/31/11 07:49 PM





What a miserable choice to have to make just to please others all your life.

There is no way that a gay person should marry someone of the opposite sex and live a lie, It is wrong on all levels.


I never said what they should or shouldn't do. I was merely saying its their choice. Who are you to say they shouldn't marry the opposite sex if that is what they want? I am saying no matter if you or gay or not your relationship is your choice.


How would you feel if you had gotten married, then found out your wife was gay, but felt she needed to pretend to be straight to live a normal life?

willing2's photo
Sun 07/31/11 07:50 PM

I never said what they should or shouldn't do. I was merely saying its their choice. Who are you to say they shouldn't marry the opposite sex if that is what they want? I am saying no matter if you or gay or not your relationship is your choice.


Do you realize how many women have been infected with HIV because their husband was gay but felt he had to marry the opposite sex? Too many. Being on the DL is not respecting your wife or husband.

It is wrong to do it. The reasons behind their choices are actually more important than their choice is. The reason of hearing from the bible thumpers how they are wrong which is false but causes so much misery.

Luckily in these situations the children can be prevented from contracting HIV from the mother.

Now you are assuming they are having sex on the dl. I am not saying they are doing that. You are trying to change this argument into something it isnt. I am only saying a relationship is a choice. Do you disagree with that? Do you know anyone whose significant other "made" the other person date them?

Yes willing makes a good point. Some gay people are very religious and chose that lifestyle to follow their religion. Again that is their own choice to make.

I am a sinner and pretty good at it.
No brag, just the facts.:wink: smokin

mightymoe's photo
Sun 07/31/11 07:51 PM






What a miserable choice to have to make just to please others all your life.

There is no way that a gay person should marry someone of the opposite sex and live a lie, It is wrong on all levels.


I never said what they should or shouldn't do. I was merely saying its their choice. Who are you to say they shouldn't marry the opposite sex if that is what they want? I am saying no matter if you or gay or not your relationship is your choice.


Do you realize how many women have been infected with HIV because their husband was gay but felt he had to marry the opposite sex? Too many. Being on the DL is not respecting your wife or husband.

It is wrong to do it. The reasons behind their choices are actually more important than their choice is. The reason of hearing from the bible thumpers how they are wrong which is false but causes so much misery.

Luckily in these situations the children can be prevented from contracting HIV from the mother.

so how is it right?

KerryO's photo
Sun 07/31/11 08:21 PM


I never said what they should or shouldn't do. I was merely saying its their choice. Who are you to say they shouldn't marry the opposite sex if that is what they want? I am saying no matter if you or gay or not your relationship is your choice.

Just like straight folks who adhere to God's word.
If, they aren't married, they stay away from sexual relations til they are married.
A homosexual who knows and practices God's word can stay homosexual and could "make the choice" to never enter into same-sex relations.



Thus preacheth the heterosexuals, who, as we all know, practice God's word faithfully to the letter--- except the part where it says "What God has joined together, let no man set asunder."

Holy Matrimony! Last time I checked, there was a lot of 'asundering' going on in the courts of Man-- about 2/3rds of them, give or take.

Stones, anyone?


-Kerry O.



Chazster's photo
Sun 07/31/11 08:30 PM






What a miserable choice to have to make just to please others all your life.

There is no way that a gay person should marry someone of the opposite sex and live a lie, It is wrong on all levels.


I never said what they should or shouldn't do. I was merely saying its their choice. Who are you to say they shouldn't marry the opposite sex if that is what they want? I am saying no matter if you or gay or not your relationship is your choice.


How would you feel if you had gotten married, then found out your wife was gay, but felt she needed to pretend to be straight to live a normal life?

How would that make it not her choice? I am not arguing what is right or wrong just that it is a choice. Are you denying that it would be her choice?

KerryO's photo
Sun 07/31/11 08:31 PM

distinguishing words 'conscious choice'


there are conscious and subconscious choice,, but they are still choice

subconscious choices just are harder to pinpoint when it comes to their 'origin'

,,, example

hamburger or big mac (conscious choice)

gluttonous eating (subconscious choice) , because the food represents something that you have learned to associate with a desired feeling or emotion,,,etc,,


Word lawyering at its finest. You claimed you never heard of the APA's stance on this, and now that you HAVE heard of it and don't like it, you're attempting to play word games and claim that you know what goes on in the subconscious minds of gay people.

As I stated previously, 'choice' is just a code word in the religious perspective on homosexuality for 'immoral'.

If you're going to buy into the whole religious sexuality gambit, why not admit that as far as the most religious people are concerned, heterosexual oral sex is also forbidden.

Oh, and then go to the 'Sex' forum here on Mingle and warn all the sinners about that. :)

-Kerry O.


KerryO's photo
Sun 07/31/11 08:39 PM






What a miserable choice to have to make just to please others all your life.

There is no way that a gay person should marry someone of the opposite sex and live a lie, It is wrong on all levels.


I never said what they should or shouldn't do. I was merely saying its their choice. Who are you to say they shouldn't marry the opposite sex if that is what they want? I am saying no matter if you or gay or not your relationship is your choice.


How would you feel if you had gotten married, then found out your wife was gay, but felt she needed to pretend to be straight to live a normal life?



Oh, probably you'll get the answer that they expect gay men and lesbians to pair off. That way 'god' gets a two-for-one and the American Taliban have saved the world again.


-Kerry O.

Chazster's photo
Sun 07/31/11 08:47 PM


distinguishing words 'conscious choice'


there are conscious and subconscious choice,, but they are still choice

subconscious choices just are harder to pinpoint when it comes to their 'origin'

,,, example

hamburger or big mac (conscious choice)

gluttonous eating (subconscious choice) , because the food represents something that you have learned to associate with a desired feeling or emotion,,,etc,,


Word lawyering at its finest. You claimed you never heard of the APA's stance on this, and now that you HAVE heard of it and don't like it, you're attempting to play word games and claim that you know what goes on in the subconscious minds of gay people.

As I stated previously, 'choice' is just a code word in the religious perspective on homosexuality for 'immoral'.

If you're going to buy into the whole religious sexuality gambit, why not admit that as far as the most religious people are concerned, heterosexual oral sex is also forbidden.

Oh, and then go to the 'Sex' forum here on Mingle and warn all the sinners about that. :)

-Kerry O.




I disagree that you have to be speaking about religion to say there is a choice. The choice is ones actions not what one likes or doesn't like. I love chocolate but it is my choice to eat it or not. Same goes with relationships. If someone is gay and wants to date the same sex that is fine. It doesn't bother me. Its their life and their choice.

KerryO's photo
Sun 07/31/11 08:49 PM







What a miserable choice to have to make just to please others all your life.

There is no way that a gay person should marry someone of the opposite sex and live a lie, It is wrong on all levels.


I never said what they should or shouldn't do. I was merely saying its their choice. Who are you to say they shouldn't marry the opposite sex if that is what they want? I am saying no matter if you or gay or not your relationship is your choice.


How would you feel if you had gotten married, then found out your wife was gay, but felt she needed to pretend to be straight to live a normal life?

How would that make it not her choice? I am not arguing what is right or wrong just that it is a choice. Are you denying that it would be her choice?


You could also choose to call yourself Houdini. I'm not saying that's right or wrong, I'm just saying you'd be making a choice.

Apropos of nothing, but one good turn of the 'Persuasive Definition' fallacy deserves another.


-Kerry O.

Chazster's photo
Sun 07/31/11 11:20 PM








What a miserable choice to have to make just to please others all your life.

There is no way that a gay person should marry someone of the opposite sex and live a lie, It is wrong on all levels.


I never said what they should or shouldn't do. I was merely saying its their choice. Who are you to say they shouldn't marry the opposite sex if that is what they want? I am saying no matter if you or gay or not your relationship is your choice.


How would you feel if you had gotten married, then found out your wife was gay, but felt she needed to pretend to be straight to live a normal life?

How would that make it not her choice? I am not arguing what is right or wrong just that it is a choice. Are you denying that it would be her choice?


You could also choose to call yourself Houdini. I'm not saying that's right or wrong, I'm just saying you'd be making a choice.

Apropos of nothing, but one good turn of the 'Persuasive Definition' fallacy deserves another.


-Kerry O.

So people don't chose who they date? There is no fallacy in saying you chose who you date. I find it no different than people who chose to date inter-racially or not. Some people find other races attractive but still chose not to date them for whatever reason. Some don't care and will date any race. It is a choice. Some people are bi sexual and the can go both ways and they still make a choice. You are just trying to discredit me because you can't discredit what I say. I agree attraction is not a choice but actions are.

msharmony's photo
Sun 07/31/11 11:33 PM


distinguishing words 'conscious choice'


there are conscious and subconscious choice,, but they are still choice

subconscious choices just are harder to pinpoint when it comes to their 'origin'

,,, example

hamburger or big mac (conscious choice)

gluttonous eating (subconscious choice) , because the food represents something that you have learned to associate with a desired feeling or emotion,,,etc,,


Word lawyering at its finest. You claimed you never heard of the APA's stance on this, and now that you HAVE heard of it and don't like it, you're attempting to play word games and claim that you know what goes on in the subconscious minds of gay people.

As I stated previously, 'choice' is just a code word in the religious perspective on homosexuality for 'immoral'.

If you're going to buy into the whole religious sexuality gambit, why not admit that as far as the most religious people are concerned, heterosexual oral sex is also forbidden.

Oh, and then go to the 'Sex' forum here on Mingle and warn all the sinners about that. :)

-Kerry O.




I was never taught nor read in the bible that oral sex is forbidden. Just fornication (sex outside of marriage) which is certainly abundant in ours and most other western civilizations,,,

mightymoe's photo
Mon 08/01/11 04:34 AM








What a miserable choice to have to make just to please others all your life.

There is no way that a gay person should marry someone of the opposite sex and live a lie, It is wrong on all levels.


I never said what they should or shouldn't do. I was merely saying its their choice. Who are you to say they shouldn't marry the opposite sex if that is what they want? I am saying no matter if you or gay or not your relationship is your choice.


How would you feel if you had gotten married, then found out your wife was gay, but felt she needed to pretend to be straight to live a normal life?

How would that make it not her choice? I am not arguing what is right or wrong just that it is a choice. Are you denying that it would be her choice?


You could also choose to call yourself Houdini. I'm not saying that's right or wrong, I'm just saying you'd be making a choice.

Apropos of nothing, but one good turn of the 'Persuasive Definition' fallacy deserves another.


-Kerry O.

so i have no choice in who i date? i have no choice in who i'm attracted to? thats a crock and you know it...