I am having trouble meeting people on many web sites because it seems no one is interested in a woman my age with kids at home. I am not looking for a father for my kids , or someone to support me, only some real companionship. Are men my age just looking for supermodels?Any thoughts?

Actually, I think men your age just want an unencumbered relationship. Their kids are already grown and left the nest, and they look for a partner who has the same. It may not be about being a father figure at all. They might just want to focus on each other without families being an issue.

Either that, or there are a lot more dirty old men out there than I would like to think.

Kids at home make dating difficult at any age. I don't even have kids of my own, but I do help take care of my three year old nephew. It puts a damper on dating, but there's some things more important.

I agree with action as well.

I am not sure why the guys do but for me I wouldn't date guys my age that had kids under 18. For one reason; if we hit off and his kids didn't like me that would be a problem. I found single dads never seem to have time for me as they need to be with their kids which are first priority. I do understand kids come first but it sure puts a kink in the relationship when dates get constantly canceled, you can't do weekend getaways on a whim, you can't have time alone; your partner hasn't much money to do much because he needs to support his kids, etc. Again; I am only speaking for myself and my own experiences.

Hummm guess it all depends on how old your kids are? Myself at my age I prefer men that have grown kids or at least they should be teenagers.

I would not doubt that many men feel the same way when meeting women around our age.

Most are hoping to be able to find someone they can spend time with. Instead of being limited to what they can do, due to one has kids they must spend most of their time with.

When I was younger, I dated a number of women who had kids, and I realized at some point that this simply was not something that worked for me. I decided around age 22 that I was never going to have kids and I did not want to be with someone who had them.

In the end, it's just an individual preference, like some people want a partner of a certain age or weight or height or occupation or income level or whatever. There's no right or wrong, it's just what works for you and what doesn't.

I hate to say it, but everything the others have told you is true in my experience.

But don't give up. Somewhere out there is a guy who loves kids and it won't make a difference to him. I've met a few of those also and they are real gems. Good luck.

yeah, what alterette said

what I Always have to remember is Im not so completely unique because I am a female. I am first a human being and so are men.

Just as much as my children mean to me, there are men out there who probably likewise feel that way about their children and who are likewise alone raising those children.

ITs important for a partner in this situation to understand the role and responsibility of parenthood, and its probably easiest to find that amongst other single parents.

I would try single parent websites, you will probably find plenty of men there who will not find children at home an issue at all.

I haven't experienced that and am now partnered with a man who is 53 with 7 children, I have 4...my kids, his kids are a gift, and if anything they enhance our relationship...

I would be more suspicious of a man who had no children, wanted no children, finding me remotely attractive...because we are a package deal, and cannot separate me from my children...a man has to fit in with the dynamics already in place, as does a woman with her man.

Old man and the hag....you just like sailing the pirate ship and enjoy your mutinous sailors!!! ARRRRGGHH!

hahahaha! Joel!....between us there are 11 kids, one almost granbaby, and if we include the kid's partners there are 7 partners also...that makes, so far 21 for dinner when they are all home....I need a really loooooong table!!!

PLUS my darlingheart bestest girlfriend in the world moving back in, and she's knocked up!

And I thought I had a lot of nieces and nephews running around. Big family is a huge blessing though.

That is why we have the floor. And the yard.





Sounds like you are having your wild ride...That's swell.



Have you ever seen the movie "You can't take it with you"?



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xT67bHWSPLQ

everyone is looking for something different. there are plenty of single dads who i would think would not mind kids at home - and lots of single non-dads who still like kids and would not mind a nice home family life. it just depends on the individual. in general we are social creatures and most enjoy home and family.

most guys are not looking for supermodels and would not know what
to do with them if they found them!

Sounds like my family ... when we are all together, there are my 8 kids, with six significant others, 16 grandkids (and 2 on the way). 30 people, not counting friends or cousins. I love big families!

Thanks for all the replies. I have joined a single parent web site and again , most of the men on the sites have grown kids. I understand the commitment it takes to deal with someone elses kid sand realize it takes work.I have tried many web sites but with no luck. I met someone at one and it seemed to be going well, but he just literally fell off the face of the earth with no explanation, very hurtful. Don't want to go there again. I guess I will hope it will happen organically , not thru the internet.

Thanks for all the replies. I have joined a single parent web site and again , most of the men on the sites have grown kids. I understand the commitment it takes to deal with someone elses kid sand realize it takes work.I have tried many web sites but with no luck. I met someone at one and it seemed to be going well, but he just literally fell off the face of the earth with no explanation, very hurtful. Don't want to go there again. I guess I will hope it will happen organically , not thru the internet.

Same thing happened to me here and I understand the feeling, but I'm I think I'll stick around anyway.

The way I look at it, dreamcatcher, I am 57 and if I ever want any nookie in the rest of my life, I would have to cough up some cash.

I don't know how old you are, but I don't see why my situation wouldn't apply to you. If you find you can't be attrative enough to anyone, FOR WHATEVER REASON, but your libido is killing you, then there is your answer.

However, if you want a loving partner, a long-term situation, then good luck to you coz you'll need it. Look at me: a poor guy, fat, and short. I have not had a long term relationship with anyone for twelve years going now. I don't see how I can do it and you can't. Sort of takes the wind out of yours sails, you wonder what is the reason to go on, but there you have it. I think the reason to go on is the fear of death, nothing else.

I don't have kids to fall back on for company and meaning. At least you have that. Use it well, and make the best of it.

By the way, dreamcatcher, you look very delectable on your photo here. I find you attractive, but don't make any dreams for us, because I am no longer the long-term kind of guy. Nor the short-term kind of guy. I have to check my driver's licence occasionally to see if I am still a guy.

Just saying. If you were near me, I would find you attractive, and either or both of us would find something such an exception in the other that nothing would ever happen.

Some people on this site have found their beherschts but most of us are alone. Some already got used to it, some are still suffering. Navygirl and I are very well adjusted without a partner. It's not a special skill or outlook that she and I have, but longevity of practice.

Look, you already did your job of passing down your DNA and genome,by having children. You can relax now. Take a vacation, hire some very good looking giggli giggiolos. You are over the hurdles, you deserve a good life now. If the neighbours laugh at you for coming home different nights with a new boyfriend, screw them. Too. Then they will love you again and will be happy to have you as a neighbour.

Really. Most people do what societal expectations tell them to do. If you are a maverick, you are hated or loved. If you can connect the maverickity with gifting those who would hate you, then you are a hero. I am not going to draw a picture here.