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Topic: Hurt feelings..
no photo
Fri 04/29/11 05:10 PM
recently i have had my feelings hurt by someone, a stranger in every since of the word.. but still we had a growing friendship, or so i thought.. im ok with the loss of communication.. just wish it didnt hurt my feelings and make me think something was wrong with me personally... i swear there should be a button that kinda snaps ya back to reality and remind me that i have worth and value of my own and if someone chooses not to be a part of my life, even as a friend, then its there loss.. see .. i can say it.. but it doesnt make it hurt any less.. and that just ticks me off.. i have always thought of myself as a very indepandant person.. tell me its human nature to want other ppl around, even if its a text message to say hey how are ya... or just tell me i am crazy either way works.. and prolly both purty much true.. lol..

rlynne's photo
Fri 04/29/11 05:23 PM
It is human nature to want other people around, no matter how independent you are, even the hermit has to come out of the cave and at least people watch....every now and again.
It doesn't make you any crazier than the rest of the human race...and hey, hope you get your spirits back...they may never know what they are missing in loosing the friendship, but every now and again, they will think about you, long after you have moved on and found three more friends to make up for the one that walked away..flowerforyou

soufiehere's photo
Fri 04/29/11 05:25 PM
You will ALWAYS get booty hurt.
The trick is to get past it.
Mourn it, bury it, use it as a lesson
and get that booty moving again,
soon as you can.

no photo
Fri 04/29/11 05:30 PM
true - most likely you are fine as it is NORMAL to take friends and relationships seriously, to be nice, and want the people in your orbit to feel connected and wanted - it's the whole idea that detachment and an I don't care attitude is normal that baffles me - that's a degree of sociopathy

if the hurt feelings were intentional or brought on by careless behavior it's prolly best u know that about that person now


no photo
Fri 04/29/11 05:47 PM
thanks everyone.. i feel alot better now.. now for the next question.. after someone ignores ur texts, and doesnt contact u for a while.. wat do you do if that person tries to contact you?? do you reply as if nothing happened? or chew them out.. or let them know they hurt you.. or just ignore them right back? (not thinking this particular person will contact me.. this is just good to know in case it happens in the future)

no photo
Fri 04/29/11 06:04 PM

thanks everyone.. i feel alot better now.. now for the next question.. after someone ignores ur texts, and doesnt contact u for a while.. wat do you do if that person tries to contact you?? do you reply as if nothing happened? or chew them out.. or let them know they hurt you.. or just ignore them right back? (not thinking this particular person will contact me.. this is just good to know in case it happens in the future)


your response to a subsequent message is something u decide with your heart regardless of the feelings others have about it

if the absence was protracted I would talk to him but definitely ask him about it (like why now all of a sudden?)

but would hesitate to become emotionally involved - as I have had this circumstance happen & that is what I did - any protracted absence says lack of interest, so ya, why now?

Simonedemidova's photo
Fri 04/29/11 06:46 PM

recently i have had my feelings hurt by someone, a stranger in every since of the word.. but still we had a growing friendship, or so i thought.. im ok with the loss of communication.. just wish it didnt hurt my feelings and make me think something was wrong with me personally... i swear there should be a button that kinda snaps ya back to reality and remind me that i have worth and value of my own and if someone chooses not to be a part of my life, even as a friend, then its there loss.. see .. i can say it.. but it doesnt make it hurt any less.. and that just ticks me off.. i have always thought of myself as a very indepandant person.. tell me its human nature to want other ppl around, even if its a text message to say hey how are ya... or just tell me i am crazy either way works.. and prolly both purty much true.. lol..


You are normal BC, i text all the time so i dont get lonely. I dont have a relationship but sometimes i wish I did. But texting helps me feel that lost companionship I would otherwise have with a boyfriend. i also lik talking on the phone and being on mingle...that helps too. It does suck when they just disappear though. Makes you wonder what the heck happened or why they stop communicating. It happens every few months but someone new always comes around...

axl_rose40's photo
Fri 04/29/11 10:10 PM

thanks everyone.. i feel alot better now.. now for the next question.. after someone ignores ur texts, and doesnt contact u for a while.. wat do you do if that person tries to contact you?? do you reply as if nothing happened? or chew them out.. or let them know they hurt you.. or just ignore them right back? (not thinking this particular person will contact me.. this is just good to know in case it happens in the future)



Personally, it is best to always express your feelings towards the persons you care for and let them tell you the reasons of the past action made. This usually provides a better result for any relationship.

DTHRomeo's photo
Fri 04/29/11 10:19 PM
Edited by DTHRomeo on Fri 04/29/11 10:19 PM
Lost of people are going to pass through your life

The ones that matter will stay in it , The ones that don't

I guess are not supposed to be in it ... Methinks.

no photo
Fri 04/29/11 11:39 PM

thanks everyone.. i feel alot better now.. now for the next question.. after someone ignores ur texts, and doesnt contact u for a while.. wat do you do if that person tries to contact you?? do you reply as if nothing happened? or chew them out.. or let them know they hurt you.. or just ignore them right back? (not thinking this particular person will contact me.. this is just good to know in case it happens in the future)



I would let them know that I got my feelings hurt but I would not place the blame on them by saying that THEY hurt my feelings. I would take responsibility for my own feelings. The reason is most of the time people don't intend to hurt you. If they do, then they don't deserve you as a friend anyway.


josie68's photo
Sat 04/30/11 12:10 AM

Lost of people are going to pass through your life

The ones that matter will stay in it , The ones that don't

I guess are not supposed to be in it ... Methinks.


Methinks you are right....

wux's photo
Sat 04/30/11 12:53 AM

Lost of people are going to pass through your life

The ones that matter will stay in it , The ones that don't

I guess are not supposed to be in it ... Methinks.


Funny you say that. I had five friends in my profile up to recently. I checked today, I have one.

What happened? I know what happened, I ruffled feathers the wrong way.

Those who are meant to stay, do. Those who are not meant to stay, don't.

The simple flow of the sea of friends that wash the shores of your existence; the come, they retreat, they came, they retreat. The surf murmurs, comes, retreats... never reaches the inland.

Hm.

josie68's photo
Sat 04/30/11 12:56 AM


Lost of people are going to pass through your life

The ones that matter will stay in it , The ones that don't

I guess are not supposed to be in it ... Methinks.


Funny you say that. I had five friends in my profile up to recently. I checked today, I have one.

What happened? I know what happened, I ruffled feathers the wrong way.

Those who are meant to stay, do. Those who are not meant to stay, don't.

The simple flow of the sea of friends that wash the shores of your existence; the come, they retreat, they came, they retreat. The surf murmurs, comes, retreats... never reaches the inland.

Hm.


Umm Mah,, I will be your friend wux , you havent ruffled my feathers.:wink:

wux's photo
Sat 04/30/11 01:06 AM
Edited by wux on Sat 04/30/11 01:08 AM



Lost of people are going to pass through your life

The ones that matter will stay in it , The ones that don't

I guess are not supposed to be in it ... Methinks.


Funny you say that. I had five friends in my profile up to recently. I checked today, I have one.

What happened? I know what happened, I ruffled feathers the wrong way.

Those who are meant to stay, do. Those who are not meant to stay, don't.

The simple flow of the sea of friends that wash the shores of your existence; the come, they retreat, they came, they retreat. The surf murmurs, comes, retreats... never reaches the inland.

Hm.


Umm Mah,, I will be your friend wux , you havent ruffled my feathers.:wink:


Oh. (Long pause.) I have always thought you were an angel. (Long, long pause of disappointment.) You know, I haven't felt like this, since I learned that there is No Santa Claus. (Fights back his disappointment's tears of anger of a man, who knows that angels MUST have feathers, otherwise why would they have wings. They are not bats, for cryign out loud.) You know, this is almost as bad as when I saw daddy humping the easter bunny in the garden very early in the morning half a century ago.

------

Seriously, I appreciate your offer. Thanks!! Sincerely.

josie68's photo
Sat 04/30/11 01:12 AM
Edited by josie68 on Sat 04/30/11 01:13 AM




Lost of people are going to pass through your life

The ones that matter will stay in it , The ones that don't

I guess are not supposed to be in it ... Methinks.


Funny you say that. I had five friends in my profile up to recently. I checked today, I have one.

What happened? I know what happened, I ruffled feathers the wrong way.

Those who are meant to stay, do. Those who are not meant to stay, don't.

The simple flow of the sea of friends that wash the shores of your existence; the come, they retreat, they came, they retreat. The surf murmurs, comes, retreats... never reaches the inland.

Hm.


Umm Mah,, I will be your friend wux , you havent ruffled my feathers.:wink:


Oh. (Long pause.) I have always thought you were an angel. (Long, long pause of disappointment.) You know, I haven't felt like this, since I learned that there is No Santa Claus. (Fights back his disappointment's tears of anger of a man, who knows that angels MUST have feathers, otherwise why would they have wings. They are not bats, for cryign out loud.) You know, this is almost as bad as when I saw daddy humping the easter bunny in the garden very early in the morning half a century ago.

------

Seriously, I appreciate your offer. Thanks!! Sincerely.



And you should feel very special as normally I dont ask people they ask me..tongue2 tongue2 LOL I only ask special people to be this Angels friend:angel: :angel: :angel: :angel:


msharmony's photo
Sat 04/30/11 01:20 AM


Lost of people are going to pass through your life

The ones that matter will stay in it , The ones that don't

I guess are not supposed to be in it ... Methinks.


Funny you say that. I had five friends in my profile up to recently. I checked today, I have one.

What happened? I know what happened, I ruffled feathers the wrong way.

Those who are meant to stay, do. Those who are not meant to stay, don't.

The simple flow of the sea of friends that wash the shores of your existence; the come, they retreat, they came, they retreat. The surf murmurs, comes, retreats... never reaches the inland.

Hm.


there is an option to remove ourself from others friends list? I never knew that,,,

I wouldnt do such a thing, I just didnt know that anyone COULD do such a thing

soufiehere's photo
Sat 04/30/11 05:57 AM

there is an option to remove ourself
from others friends list? I never
knew that,,,
I wouldnt do such a thing, I just didnt
know that anyone COULD do such a thing

That wee red check box next to their name,
on your 'Friends' page, removes them from
your 'Friends' list, and you from theirs.

It will also remove any testimonial they
may have posted for you, and vice versa.

Often, a very necessary feature.

gotlife's photo
Sat 04/30/11 06:13 AM
Learning to not let things bother you in such ways takes time and focus, you have to give yourself reason.

I have grown nearly completely numb to broken great relationships let alone simple growing ones.

The way I see it is, who cares why, it's not going to change anything and there are over 5 billion people on this planet, I have plenty of people to meet in my life still.

Friends come and go, the best part is there is nearly an unlimited supply. What remains is what you take from that friendship, what you learn, how it changes you etc.

A friend of mine said it best I think "NEXT".

Jess642's photo
Sat 04/30/11 06:14 AM

thanks everyone.. i feel alot better now.. now for the next question.. after someone ignores ur texts, and doesnt contact u for a while.. wat do you do if that person tries to contact you?? do you reply as if nothing happened? or chew them out.. or let them know they hurt you.. or just ignore them right back? (not thinking this particular person will contact me.. this is just good to know in case it happens in the future)


What I do?....if they call...then I answer...say hello...and wait...for whatever comes next...

somewhere in that conversation I will explain that their sudden absence from communication left me wondering...

then I wait......

and usually there is an explanation.

One simple rule though...if it took 2 seconds to text me when they wanted to...before they didn't respond to mine...nor answer my emails...if it only took 2 seconds BEFORE...

they have exactly 2 seconds now.


Then they are dust.

But I am a harsh person...and not very 'nice'.


no photo
Sat 04/30/11 11:11 AM
Edited by sweetestgirl11 on Sat 04/30/11 11:12 AM

Learning to not let things bother you in such ways takes time and focus, you have to give yourself reason.

I have grown nearly completely numb to broken great relationships let alone simple growing ones.

The way I see it is, who cares why, it's not going to change anything and there are over 5 billion people on this planet, I have plenty of people to meet in my life still.

Friends come and go, the best part is there is nearly an unlimited supply. What remains is what you take from that friendship, what you learn, how it changes you etc.

A friend of mine said it best I think "NEXT".


to me that is totally foreign and even a little pervy - - but I come from a small town - most of my friends & people I meet remain my friends permanently - even if I don't see much of them because of geography...

maybe it's the internet world that is your way.

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