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| Topic: Forgiveness | |
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thank you ladies, and I have to kind of agree with Betty.. then that is your cross to bear any significant event will be remembered - if u can never forgive than you will live a bitter life indeed quite honestly in my quest for a new love this is one thing that makes younger guys attractive is that the bitterness hasn't set in the same is probably true of women who are older as well (so I'm not picking on you man0) - so I make an extra effort to not let the bitterness of unforgiven deeds age me -just another side benefit of forgiveness and I don't forgive everything, and just because I forgive you doesn't mean we're going to be friends either I do it for my own well being mostly I agree it is not always easy. It often takes time sometimes many years. When I think of the most grievous that I have forgiven, I forgave because I could understand their actions - even if I did not agree with them, and even if they hurt - they might have done so unknowlingly <if there's a chance of that I usually forgive in time |
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Does one ever really forget? |
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My mom, son, true friends, late husband and I have had to forgive small hurts, barbs, insults, neglect etc etc more than once over the years. Most of those are also forgotten. We are imperfect beings and make mistakes that sometimes hurt those we love the most. Forgiveness is what allows us to move forward and continue to love.
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Forgiveness means giving up all hope of a better past. what do you think this means?? It does not really make sense. If you flip it into an algebraic equation then: Not forgiving=hope of a better past. I am not feeling it. |
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Does one ever really forget? It is not as if we have control (usually) over our ability to forget, we can choose to forgive. Deeds done to us that require forgiveness usually involve pain. Sometimes we forgive and keep the relationship, be it a friendship or a lover, sometimes we forgive but leave the relationship anyway. Which on the surface sounds like forgiveness didn't happen but every situation is different. When a guy I was dating cheated on me I left because that is behavior I have chosen not to deal with but over time and understanding his motivation, I forgave him and we connected again as friends. Just one example... exactly seamac in a situation that involves a lover forgiveness is often required on both sides not in the situation u described of being cheated on. but I agree with your resolution. I have a peaceful but distant relationship with my ex boyfriend for a very similar reason - his "wandering " and lies but I had a lover once, an almost lover, once and we hurt each other grievously and to this day - some 20 years - it pains me to not know whether he has forgiven me and that I have not been able to tell him that I have forgiven him. the power of forgiveness is insurmountably strong |
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Yes Dear! It DID smell like roses anyway!
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Forgiveness means giving up all hope of a better past. what do you think this means?? We cannot change the past or the hurt that was done to us. Forgiveness in this sense to me means letting go of the hurt and realizing that there is nothing you can do to change history. Learn from it and move on. Maybe it also means to forgive ourselves for being so naive to have allowed ourselves to be hurt in the first place. We don't forget and we never fully forgive. When someone hurts us the dynamic of that relationship is forever changed. The trust has been broken and once that happens we will always view that person's actions with suspicion, whether we admit it or not, it is just human nature. |
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Foregiveness is the GREATEST gift of "self-indulgence"!
So do yourself a favor! |
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Changing the past is impossible. Sometimes forgetting it impossible too! Other times forgetting the past is a healing experience.
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Forgiveness means giving up all hope of a better past. what do you think this means?? We cannot change the past or the hurt that was done to us. Forgiveness in this sense to me means letting go of the hurt and realizing that there is nothing you can do to change history. Learn from it and move on. Maybe it also means to forgive ourselves for being so naive to have allowed ourselves to be hurt in the first place. We don't forget and we never fully forgive. When someone hurts us the dynamic of that relationship is forever changed. The trust has been broken and once that happens we will always view that person's actions with suspicion, whether we admit it or not, it is just human nature. Well said Jayne...and you are still a lady 
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Iffins I could, Id just drink the past away.....screw forgiveness, its too much like surrender
  
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Iffins I could, Id just drink the past away.....screw forgiveness, its too much like surrender  I like the way you think
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Forgiveness means---what's done is done and cannot be undone. . and if you are lucky. . . you will also forget. . but forgetting is not quite as easy. . and nearly impossible. Just because you can forgive someone doesn't mean you can trust them or move forward with them in the same perspective.
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Forgiveness means---what's done is done and cannot be undone. . and if you are lucky. . . you will also forget. . but forgetting is not quite as easy. . and nearly impossible. Just because you can forgive someone doesn't mean you can trust them or move forward with them in the same perspective. Gorgeous and smart.........you are gonna rip someone a new one :) |
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Forgiveness means giving up all hope of a better past. what do you think this means?? but what does that whole sentence mean ?? I disagree with what its saying.. As to go back and truly forgive all that was to forgive, in YOUR past... THEN,,,its NOW TIME(thoughts you feel inside, through your forgiving),,would significantly be VIEWED as YOU just made your past BETTER. And also others views of you as well,, like if you told a friend five years ago,,you would never speak to them again,,,But,,today you looked them up,,and apolizided for that action taken back then,,and Now your Both friends again. Then in their eyes and mind as well as your own,,YOU MADE YOUR PAST BETTER.. |
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hope and past are not even conducive in the same sentence. hope meaning something enlightening to your future....
To say Giving up all hope of a better past. .= = =no sense at all |
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After a time, after the forgiveness, the situation is just a story with no emotions connected to it.
I forgive to help me not carry the burden. Not forgetting allows me to learn from the situation. What I wind up with is a gift. Sometimes, to surrender is to win. |
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hope and past are not even conducive in the same sentence. hope meaning something enlightening to your future.... To say Giving up all hope of a better past. .= = =no sense at all Uhhh Babe...... the mistake you are making is to think we can even spell "condusive"...I am from Texas...they don't teach that left wing liberal hippy communist panzy crap around here. We also have a problem with driving on ice and trying to think with our peckers....we ain't good at either one of them. |
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LOL my bad!
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hope and past are not even conducive in the same sentence. hope meaning something enlightening to your future.... To say Giving up all hope of a better past. .= = =no sense at all Uhhh Babe...... the mistake you are making is to think we can even spell "condusive"...I am from Texas...they don't teach that left wing liberal hippy communist panzy crap around here. We also have a problem with driving on ice and trying to think with our peckers....we ain't good at either one of them. now in texas, using ice and our peckers is a different story altogether... |
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