Topic: Why do men get mad when you help yourself?
no photo
Sat 01/22/11 01:21 PM


we'll do it....in our own time whoa


That is why we do it ourselves or call the local handyman. I just contacted an electrician to fix my light. Its a real safety hazard when you can't see where you are going. Not work risking injury waiting for a man to do it in his own time.
thank you. I didn't really want to do it anyway :tongue:

navygirl's photo
Sat 01/22/11 01:26 PM



we'll do it....in our own time whoa


That is why we do it ourselves or call the local handyman. I just contacted an electrician to fix my light. Its a real safety hazard when you can't see where you are going. Not work risking injury waiting for a man to do it in his own time.
thank you. I didn't really want to do it anyway :tongue:


No worries. Thats the wonderful thing about being independent.

RainbowTrout's photo
Sat 01/22/11 01:35 PM
Well. Geez. Here I was trying to teach you how to be patient and tolerant. See where expectations will get you. You just can't teach some people. What was it that I was supposed to do, again?laugh

navygirl's photo
Sat 01/22/11 01:37 PM

Well. Geez. Here I was trying to teach you how to be patient and tolerant. See where expectations will get you. You just can't teach some people. What was it that I was supposed to do, again?laugh


Well, I guess you failed trying to teach me patience. laugh

no photo
Sat 01/22/11 01:39 PM

Easy!

The guys in question are lazy.

Some people are workers....some ain't.

I deal with that at my plant all the time. I tell em straight up..."I got no use for whatever excuse is about to pop out of your mouth but, if you really wanna pissme off say the words "I was gonna""


and the reason her man friends get mad at her is cuz she has flagged their lack of initiative and broken promise by completing the job herself - at least their "attitude" may indicate a conscience at some level....slaphead

hey NG - haven't seen you in awhilewaving

hey krupawaving

no photo
Sat 01/22/11 01:42 PM



I learned years ago that if you want something done.......I don't even ask anymore, I simply do it. Of course, being alone now, I have no other choice, but life just seems simpler if I know it's taken care of. I think most guys get upsety by this because somehow, they feel you have wounded their masculinity....God forbid a woman be able to do a man's joblaugh laugh


Oh yeah? Go pee your name in the snow. hehehehehehehe
Took a lot of work Krupa....but I did it!!!!!laugh laugh


sounds like work that would be cold on the legsrofl slaphead

motowndowntown's photo
Sat 01/22/11 01:42 PM
Real men don't get mad when a woman does it herself.

Sometimes we even like to watch.

navygirl's photo
Sat 01/22/11 02:13 PM


Easy!

The guys in question are lazy.

Some people are workers....some ain't.

I deal with that at my plant all the time. I tell em straight up..."I got no use for whatever excuse is about to pop out of your mouth but, if you really wanna pissme off say the words "I was gonna""


and the reason her man friends get mad at her is cuz she has flagged their lack of initiative and broken promise by completing the job herself - at least their "attitude" may indicate a conscience at some level....slaphead

hey NG - haven't seen you in awhilewaving

hey krupawaving


I am thinking they feel guilty for not keeping their promises which is why they get mad. It probably does hurt their ego but they will get over it. I haven't been online much as I have been busy with my renovations and have finally fnished all my home renos. Got tired of waiting for these men to help me. It was a big job but I know have a home and not a work in progress. I am thinking they feel guilty for not keeping their promiseNow the fun part is cleaning up. Hope you are doing well in 2011.

navygirl's photo
Sat 01/22/11 02:14 PM

Real men don't get mad when a woman does it herself.

Sometimes we even like to watch.


And you can actually learn something new too.

navygirl's photo
Sat 01/22/11 03:43 PM
Hmm, I just had a thought that maybe these men that don't show up to help really don't know how to help me in the first place. So rather than admitting it; they put it off until you do it or you hire someone that can do it. It makes sense now as I am meeting more men that admit they aren't handy.

FearandLoathing's photo
Sat 01/22/11 03:45 PM
Because we said we would do it, you have to remember that for some of us our time stamps are off by about a month.

Tessa02's photo
Sat 01/22/11 03:50 PM
Edited by Tessa02 on Sat 01/22/11 03:51 PM
I used to be married to a carpenter. One of my closets had one lonely shelf about 24 inches from the ceiling. I wanted another shelf added about halfway between the two. Ex DH said he'd do it but never did. Now, mind you I'd been watching & learning a little handy work myself & hadn't quite figured out types of woods & grades, etc. So, I got ticked one day & needed the shelf to be 3 foot & so I cut off a foot off a 4 foot board on the table saw. It just happened to be birch & highly expensive for a closet shelf. It's still there!!!

no photo
Sat 01/22/11 04:03 PM

Real men don't get mad when a woman does it herself.

Sometimes we even like to watch.
Ouhhhhhhhhhh,,that was a GOOD answer,,,,,lol
drinker Yes we do,,,,laugh

no photo
Sat 01/22/11 04:04 PM


Some guys are lazy or flaky, but still want to feel needed. So when they're too lazy or flake out on what they promised to do, they get upset when you do it because it makes them feel as if you don't need them. And when they feel like they are not needed, it makes them feel less manly.


I understand that completely. But how long do you wait for him to stop being lazy or flaky to do what he promised? I think three weeks to put up a shelf or now a month to fix a light is a bit much. I have a basement light that is out and its very dangerous as I have had a few falls because its so dark. Been waiting a month for a friend to help but still no help so I am pulling it out today. If I can't fix it; then I will hire an electrician. If it hurts his manhood; then he brought this on himself.


I probably would not have waited three weeks! It's not your fault he was lazy. You did what you needed to do. If that makes him feel less manly and not needed, that's his problem.

no photo
Sat 01/22/11 04:28 PM



Easy!

The guys in question are lazy.

Some people are workers....some ain't.

I deal with that at my plant all the time. I tell em straight up..."I got no use for whatever excuse is about to pop out of your mouth but, if you really wanna pissme off say the words "I was gonna""


and the reason her man friends get mad at her is cuz she has flagged their lack of initiative and broken promise by completing the job herself - at least their "attitude" may indicate a conscience at some level....slaphead
yes I agree. I tend to think that their anger is misplaced guilt. Glad to hear you are doing well
hey NG - haven't seen you in awhilewaving

hey krupawaving


I am thinking they feel guilty for not keeping their promises which is why they get mad. It probably does hurt their ego but they will get over it. I haven't been online much as I have been busy with my renovations and have finally fnished all my home renos. Got tired of waiting for these men to help me. It was a big job but I know have a home and not a work in progress. I am thinking they feel guilty for not keeping their promiseNow the fun part is cleaning up. Hope you are doing well in 2011.

markc48's photo
Sat 01/22/11 04:44 PM
Oh just ask him to loan you the tools. He wont want to do that so he will just do it. When he gets his tools together.

krupa's photo
Sat 01/22/11 04:48 PM
Allow me to pop your cherry of naivete' ladies.



80% of the men I know aint worth a damned.

Same holds true with the chicks....

Sure! I would gladly hump you but, I aint dumb enough to use my real name till I know if you are gonna put out. (which is exactly why you are reading my actual name)

no photo
Sat 01/22/11 04:54 PM

I have been doing renos in the house over a few years. I get offers from boyfriends, or just male friends to help me. I accept it but the guy cancels or doesn't show up. In one incident; I waited three weeks for a shelf to be put up by a guy that was living with me. So, I ended up doing it myself. Then the guy gets mad at me and says he was going to do it. So what seems to be the problem? Why make a promise to help if you don't intend to help and then get mad when we do things ourselves? Opinions please.


Perhaps he was waiting for the stars to align and Great Cthulu to awaken? Or maybe he didn't know how to do it and didn't want to appear unmanly to you and so he kept putting it off hoping you would forget about it.

no photo
Sat 01/22/11 04:57 PM

I have been doing renos in the house over a few years. I get offers from boyfriends, or just male friends to help me. I accept it but the guy cancels or doesn't show up. In one incident; I waited three weeks for a shelf to be put up by a guy that was living with me. So, I ended up doing it myself. Then the guy gets mad at me and says he was going to do it. So what seems to be the problem? Why make a promise to help if you don't intend to help and then get mad when we do things ourselves? Opinions please.
Just a thought here for you to feel..
I met a young lady who was in need of a man,
see she told me her life and all its pains.
One of them was her house was a wreck, so I met her,
Dated her and fixed her toilet which wouldn't flush.
Fixed her shower which only peeed a stream.
I even put her in a brand new kitchen Sink,
her old one would even hold water,,and then,,,
she found another,,,,so all that work, all that time.
I would have spent it better, just writing a rhyme..

BECAUSE of stuff like THIS,,we become a tad bit MORE,,put-off to REALLY JUMP RIGHT IN,,,,,,but THATS just my story,,,and many feel other issues..
I will STILLbe ME,,,with anyone else,,but it now will come with reason's
to feel I might just be doing a favor,,for someone who doesn't even really like my friendship,,just my abilities,,,wink,and no-one wants to just be someone else's game of hurt,,or used,,,,ONLY....

krupa's photo
Sat 01/22/11 05:08 PM


I have been doing renos in the house over a few years. I get offers from boyfriends, or just male friends to help me. I accept it but the guy cancels or doesn't show up. In one incident; I waited three weeks for a shelf to be put up by a guy that was living with me. So, I ended up doing it myself. Then the guy gets mad at me and says he was going to do it. So what seems to be the problem? Why make a promise to help if you don't intend to help and then get mad when we do things ourselves? Opinions please.
Just a thought here for you to feel..
I met a young lady who was in need of a man,
see she told me her life and all its pains.
One of them was her house was a wreck, so I met her,
Dated her and fixed her toilet which wouldn't flush.
Fixed her shower which only peeed a stream.
I even put her in a brand new kitchen Sink,
her old one would even hold water,,and then,,,
she found another,,,,so all that work, all that time.
I would have spent it better, just writing a rhyme..

BECAUSE of stuff like THIS,,we become a tad bit MORE,,put-off to REALLY JUMP RIGHT IN,,,,,,but THATS just my story,,,and many feel other issues..
I will STILLbe ME,,,with anyone else,,but it now will come with reason's
to feel I might just be doing a favor,,for someone who doesn't even really like my friendship,,just my abilities,,,wink,and no-one wants to just be someone else's game of hurt,,or used,,,,ONLY....


Allow me to retort.....

ahem

I don't mind getting used. Seriously.....

Sex is just sex. Love is love.


Being used for nothing more than some physical pleasure hardly seems to cross moral boundries for me. When I love someone, I ain't gonna f**k anyone else. When I have found myself single...I got used and honestly, used strictly for the sex. I didn't mind it.