Topic: Friends?
Gossipmpm's photo
Fri 11/06/09 08:30 PM
I have more male freinds than female

I've learned so much from them

They show me respect. Love. Trust !:heart:



synergized's photo
Fri 11/06/09 08:31 PM


I have quite a few male friends. The thing I do not have nor will I have is a friend with benefits. It's just not for me. There of course have been a few close calls, because some of my male friends think sex is just the next step in our 'friendship'. Unless a lady and man can communicate again at this point what they really want, it could have ended badly, and we would have lost our friendship. Sometimes when women start with friendship, and the male initiates physical aspects, the woman gets confused and thinks the man wants to move past the friendship. It all depends on how well both of you communicate what you want and need, and keep communicating it. You can't say it once, then expect the friendship to change and everyone still be on the same page.


Okay, this is soo new to me. Is that what a friend with benefits means? Isn't that a relationship?


Well..a friend with benefits means just friends with sex added in. There is no committment..and they can also be friends with benefits with many others at the same time.

Gossipmpm's photo
Fri 11/06/09 08:36 PM
Freinds with benefits??

That's crap to me

I do not have sex with my freinds

To me

That's just an excuse for sleeping around!!

In my humble opinion:heart:

no photo
Fri 11/06/09 10:48 PM
Wasn't looking for benefits. Just the friendship. Now it is click and delete.
Is that a right click or a left click? So confusing...

che_'s photo
Sat 11/07/09 02:16 AM

OK, so why is it that a man and a woman cannot be friends? They have to have a relationship or nothing.
I just had that experience. So sad.grumble

I have found that friends are so much more rewarding than any other type of relationship sandy, and I'm so very sorry that this person that hurt you couldn't see that... I mean, with friends. there is not so much expectations... not so much stress! Being friends allows you the time to learn so much more about someone without the pressures of aving to act a certain way or say "just the right thing" there just seems to be so much more... time, forgivness, everything! I hope the next person you get close to is able to share the wonders of friendship because so many of us would prefer to be friends. I myself do anyway and if that were the only way I could stay aquainted with you, then bet your bippy FRIENDS WE'D BE! Lol... good luck hun
Christineflowers flowers flowers

Katzenschnauzer's photo
Sat 11/07/09 02:25 AM
I enjoy my girlfriends for shopping, etc but when I go to a barbeque or whatever and all the men are congregating in another room or patio I want to go hang with them. More exciting I think.

Shasta1's photo
Sat 11/07/09 12:15 PM



I have quite a few male friends. The thing I do not have nor will I have is a friend with benefits. It's just not for me. There of course have been a few close calls, because some of my male friends think sex is just the next step in our 'friendship'. Unless a lady and man can communicate again at this point what they really want, it could have ended badly, and we would have lost our friendship. Sometimes when women start with friendship, and the male initiates physical aspects, the woman gets confused and thinks the man wants to move past the friendship. It all depends on how well both of you communicate what you want and need, and keep communicating it. You can't say it once, then expect the friendship to change and everyone still be on the same page.


Okay, this is soo new to me. Is that what a friend with benefits means? Isn't that a relationship?


Well..a friend with benefits means just friends with sex added in. There is no committment..and they can also be friends with benefits with many others at the same time.


Well that sounds very advantageous for some...sounds more like- I'll sleep with you but am still going to check out whats still out there...just in case...I find someone who I like better..Doesn't sound like it's worth any sort of commitment...plus the fact they might contract something.
I'm with G., no thanks...my energy is for a real person.

Ladylid2012's photo
Sat 11/07/09 01:22 PM




I have quite a few male friends. The thing I do not have nor will I have is a friend with benefits. It's just not for me. There of course have been a few close calls, because some of my male friends think sex is just the next step in our 'friendship'. Unless a lady and man can communicate again at this point what they really want, it could have ended badly, and we would have lost our friendship. Sometimes when women start with friendship, and the male initiates physical aspects, the woman gets confused and thinks the man wants to move past the friendship. It all depends on how well both of you communicate what you want and need, and keep communicating it. You can't say it once, then expect the friendship to change and everyone still be on the same page.


Okay, this is soo new to me. Is that what a friend with benefits means? Isn't that a relationship?


Well..a friend with benefits means just friends with sex added in. There is no committment..and they can also be friends with benefits with many others at the same time.


Well that sounds very advantageous for some...sounds more like- I'll sleep with you but am still going to check out whats still out there...just in case...I find someone who I like better..Doesn't sound like it's worth any sort of commitment...plus the fact they might contract something.
I'm with G., no thanks...my energy is for a real person.


It's not as bad as some are making it sound...my friends with benefits was a dear friend...we were both going through a difficult time, we didn't have any interest in seeking partners, we knew we were not ready or fully healed from our last break ups, we talked about everything...we still had feelings for our ex's..we vented on each other, cried on each other and we got horny and had sex one time..it was great sex, so we continued the physical part. We knew we were not partner material, our core values were very different.
We continued with the physical, and the friend part..hence friends with benefits. Over time we slept together less and less and moved into just friends...he has since passed away, and I miss the friend, not the lover.

tohyup's photo
Sat 11/07/09 02:23 PM
It is nice to have a good friend who is a good lover too .
However friends with no sexual encounters are very important as well . You can not have enough friends in this complex world of ours .

Shasta1's photo
Sat 11/07/09 03:05 PM





I have quite a few male friends. The thing I do not have nor will I have is a friend with benefits. It's just not for me. There of course have been a few close calls, because some of my male friends think sex is just the next step in our 'friendship'. Unless a lady and man can communicate again at this point what they really want, it could have ended badly, and we would have lost our friendship. Sometimes when women start with friendship, and the male initiates physical aspects, the woman gets confused and thinks the man wants to move past the friendship. It all depends on how well both of you communicate what you want and need, and keep communicating it. You can't say it once, then expect the friendship to change and everyone still be on the same page.


Okay, this is soo new to me. Is that what a friend with benefits means? Isn't that a relationship?


Well..a friend with benefits means just friends with sex added in. There is no committment..and they can also be friends with benefits with many others at the same time.


Well that sounds very advantageous for some...sounds more like- I'll sleep with you but am still going to check out whats still out there...just in case...I find someone who I like better..Doesn't sound like it's worth any sort of commitment...plus the fact they might contract something.
I'm with G., no thanks...my energy is for a real person.


It's not as bad as some are making it sound...my friends with benefits was a dear friend...we were both going through a difficult time, we didn't have any interest in seeking partners, we knew we were not ready or fully healed from our last break ups, we talked about everything...we still had feelings for our ex's..we vented on each other, cried on each other and we got horny and had sex one time..it was great sex, so we continued the physical part. We knew we were not partner material, our core values were very different.
We continued with the physical, and the friend part..hence friends with benefits. Over time we slept together less and less and moved into just friends...he has since passed away, and I miss the friend, not the lover.


Am saddened for your loss. What you explained...makes sense. It just came across differently that that to me at first..flowerforyou

Ladylid2012's photo
Sat 11/07/09 03:08 PM






I have quite a few male friends. The thing I do not have nor will I have is a friend with benefits. It's just not for me. There of course have been a few close calls, because some of my male friends think sex is just the next step in our 'friendship'. Unless a lady and man can communicate again at this point what they really want, it could have ended badly, and we would have lost our friendship. Sometimes when women start with friendship, and the male initiates physical aspects, the woman gets confused and thinks the man wants to move past the friendship. It all depends on how well both of you communicate what you want and need, and keep communicating it. You can't say it once, then expect the friendship to change and everyone still be on the same page.


Okay, this is soo new to me. Is that what a friend with benefits means? Isn't that a relationship?


Well..a friend with benefits means just friends with sex added in. There is no committment..and they can also be friends with benefits with many others at the same time.


Well that sounds very advantageous for some...sounds more like- I'll sleep with you but am still going to check out whats still out there...just in case...I find someone who I like better..Doesn't sound like it's worth any sort of commitment...plus the fact they might contract something.
I'm with G., no thanks...my energy is for a real person.


It's not as bad as some are making it sound...my friends with benefits was a dear friend...we were both going through a difficult time, we didn't have any interest in seeking partners, we knew we were not ready or fully healed from our last break ups, we talked about everything...we still had feelings for our ex's..we vented on each other, cried on each other and we got horny and had sex one time..it was great sex, so we continued the physical part. We knew we were not partner material, our core values were very different.
We continued with the physical, and the friend part..hence friends with benefits. Over time we slept together less and less and moved into just friends...he has since passed away, and I miss the friend, not the lover.


Am saddened for your loss. What you explained...makes sense. It just came across differently that that to me at first..flowerforyou


flowerforyou

Thank You...
I'm am fine now from the loss, like I said, I miss my friend. Just felt to explain it better as it was being presented as an excuse to sleep around...keep looking. Maybe for some is like that..ours was not.

no photo
Sat 11/07/09 07:22 PM


OK, so why is it that a man and a woman cannot be friends? They have to have a relationship or nothing.
I just had that experience. So sad.grumble

I have found that friends are so much more rewarding than any other type of relationship sandy, and I'm so very sorry that this person that hurt you couldn't see that... I mean, with friends. there is not so much expectations... not so much stress! Being friends allows you the time to learn so much more about someone without the pressures of aving to act a certain way or say "just the right thing" there just seems to be so much more... time, forgivness, everything! I hope the next person you get close to is able to share the wonders of friendship because so many of us would prefer to be friends. I myself do anyway and if that were the only way I could stay aquainted with you, then bet your bippy FRIENDS WE'D BE! Lol... good luck hun
Christineflowers flowers flowers


thank you. So sweet.flowerforyou

Linny1's photo
Sat 11/07/09 07:30 PM
I had been married so long that I lost most of my friends. It is hard making new ones and, especially on Saturday night, I get lonesome and would really love to have a friend here with or without benefits... I think the whole idea is fine as long as both agree upon it.

delilady's photo
Sat 11/07/09 07:44 PM
I've learned from my male friends that guys do not open up to each other the way women do with their female friends. My male friends are more likely to discuss their feelings with me and ask my opinion. From them I learn the male perspective on things that I may not have understood before. So, in my opinion, we both walk away from the conversation understanding the opposite sex a little bit better.

no photo
Sun 11/08/09 07:00 AM

OK, so why is it that a man and a woman cannot be friends? They have to have a relationship or nothing.
I just had that experience. So sad.grumble
It’s my guess that when number 3 came in to the picture they didn’t want the competition. I have had that happen to me number of times and it always goes back to the same reason.
The one that hurt the most was when my BEST friend said she would always be there for me. ohwell

oldsage's photo
Sun 11/08/09 10:35 AM





I have quite a few male friends. The thing I do not have nor will I have is a friend with benefits. It's just not for me. There of course have been a few close calls, because some of my male friends think sex is just the next step in our 'friendship'. Unless a lady and man can communicate again at this point what they really want, it could have ended badly, and we would have lost our friendship. Sometimes when women start with friendship, and the male initiates physical aspects, the woman gets confused and thinks the man wants to move past the friendship. It all depends on how well both of you communicate what you want and need, and keep communicating it. You can't say it once, then expect the friendship to change and everyone still be on the same page.


Okay, this is soo new to me. Is that what a friend with benefits means? Isn't that a relationship?


Well..a friend with benefits means just friends with sex added in. There is no committment..and they can also be friends with benefits with many others at the same time.


Well that sounds very advantageous for some...sounds more like- I'll sleep with you but am still going to check out whats still out there...just in case...I find someone who I like better..Doesn't sound like it's worth any sort of commitment...plus the fact they might contract something.
I'm with G., no thanks...my energy is for a real person.


It's not as bad as some are making it sound...my friends with benefits was a dear friend...we were both going through a difficult time, we didn't have any interest in seeking partners, we knew we were not ready or fully healed from our last break ups, we talked about everything...we still had feelings for our ex's..we vented on each other, cried on each other and we got horny and had sex one time..it was great sex, so we continued the physical part. We knew we were not partner material, our core values were very different.
We continued with the physical, and the friend part..hence friends with benefits. Over time we slept together less and less and moved into just friends...he has since passed away, and I miss the friend, not the lover.


I say; NEVER pass judgement on ANYONE. What works for one may not work for others. What happens behind closed doors, is NOBODIES business. If FWB, works for you; God Bless you both. Those that it doesn't work for; God Bless you too.
I know that if I am privledged enough to be close to a lady, we will have had a chat & understand EXACTLY where WE are at. I hide nothing & will lie to no one. A "TRUE FRIEND" will never judge a "FRIEND."

My thoughts on "Friends With Benefits."

freeonthree's photo
Sun 11/08/09 10:38 AM
Edited by freeonthree on Sun 11/08/09 10:40 AM

OK, so why is it that a man and a woman cannot be friends? They have to have a relationship or nothing.
I just had that experience. So sad.grumble


Thats simply not true... I have no interest in a relationship, other than friends. I know im not alone...
You have to be friends before you can have a serious relationship anyway, thats the bottom line smokin

countrymike's photo
Sun 11/08/09 11:30 AM
Old Sage Defends FWB one more time...

I say; NEVER pass judgement on ANYONE. What works for one may not work for others. What happens behind closed doors, is NOBODIES business. If FWB, works for you; God Bless you both. Those that it doesn't work for; God Bless you too.
I know that if I am privledged enough to be close to a lady, we will have had a chat & understand EXACTLY where WE are at. I hide nothing & will lie to no one. A "TRUE FRIEND" will never judge a "FRIEND."

My thoughts on "Friends With Benefits."



Now Sir ,if you are going to use God as a blesser of the thought of FWB , then where do His rules like "Thou Shall NOT Commit Adultery" fall in to play.You toss around God's Blessings as if He condones immoral behavior.I for one think He does not ..How about you? Anything goes? That is a stretch but if you say that it is alright behind closed doors, then who am I to argue..So according to your belief (and correct me if I have you wrong)I have God's blessing to do my friend's wife as long as it is in my house behind a closed door..Again ,I think not...JMO

no photo
Sun 11/08/09 11:41 AM

Old Sage Defends FWB one more time...

I say; NEVER pass judgement on ANYONE. What works for one may not work for others. What happens behind closed doors, is NOBODIES business. If FWB, works for you; God Bless you both. Those that it doesn't work for; God Bless you too.
I know that if I am privledged enough to be close to a lady, we will have had a chat & understand EXACTLY where WE are at. I hide nothing & will lie to no one. A "TRUE FRIEND" will never judge a "FRIEND."

My thoughts on "Friends With Benefits."



Now Sir ,if you are going to use God as a blesser of the thought of FWB , then where do His rules like "Thou Shall NOT Commit Adultery" fall in to play.You toss around God's Blessings as if He condones immoral behavior.I for one think He does not ..How about you? Anything goes? That is a stretch but if you say that it is alright behind closed doors, then who am I to argue..So according to your belief (and correct me if I have you wrong)I have God's blessing to do my friend's wife as long as it is in my house behind a closed door..Again ,I think not...JMO


I think you might have misunderstood Sage. Nowhere did I see the word or implication of adultery. FWB is just that, friends, also sexual relationship, no strings attached. If both people have a clear understanding of what it is, then where is the problem?

oldsage's photo
Sun 11/08/09 11:42 AM
Mike, I am a widower. I speak for me and if I chose to to offer people the "blessing" of "my God"; that is up to me. Nothing I spoke of condones, stepping out on a significant other/wife. I think most of the people posting on this subject or single; in one manner or the other. If I offended you or "YOUR" God in some manner; I think you took my thoughts in a manner other than they were offered.

More thoughts of Old Sage.

This is an edit for the ladies comment.
If I have an FWB relationship, there are some VERY strong "strings" attached to it. I am VERY PICKY; so any FWB of mine would KNOW FOR A FACT, that they could DEPEND ON ME, way more than someone that I am just "friends" with.
Another thought/opinion of mine; Friendship, like love, has many different levels.