I see a lot of threads from people asking if they should date, or why the can't find someone to date. I'm left wondering why even bother? I decided not to long ago that I am at this point in time not capable of having a relationship, for whatever reason, and that reason isn't really important as the failure rate far exceeds any success (I won't get into the math of it, people tend to be bothered by my mathmatical equations here). I think personally some people at their point in life can or cannot date, for any number of reasons. Some are more apt to date, some are more social than others...and others just need to focus on them before adding anyone else to the equation.

I suppose it is somewhat easier for me as I don't tend to like many people anyway, and am comfortable by myself. What I don't understand is that if for how ever many years one thing isn't working...why bother trying to do it in the first place? Seems like a step backwards to me, or perhaps I'm looking at it too logically. Any insight?

I'm not looking but if she finds me I may take a peek.

I'm the same way, i stopped looking or making an effort some time ago. For me it seems hook ups are easier to find!

I came here LOOKING for friends for a weekend out, I didn't care male or female as it was just for the company and a night out.
As I was new to the area I had just moved to.
After only a month I realized their was no one closer than 500 miles to me in Indy, so I gave up on that idea,yet never took it out of my profile.
I got in all the forums, joked, made friends, got silly, and even moderated,,,in my own fasion,wink,lol
And after about a year, I got hit on by a dude,,,,lol
so I went back and changed my profile to just female friends to go out with,wink,
BE CAREFUL how you word your profile as many read it another way,,,,wink,,
But since I have been on here,now about three years.
I have met some, dated some, and have no real regrets...
But I would have thought by NOW,,,I would have found her or her me,
who would never want to let me go.....wink,,,lol
BUT,,,,,NOTTTTTTTTTTTTTtttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt yet...
And the man in me,,,just can't give in and say I am DONE with looking
Because, the next HELLO, or Friends request,,,MIGHT BE HER...

As positive as that sounds and as much as I would really like to believe the possibility, I simply think I'm far too realistic to believe that the next hello or friend request could in fact be her. Matter of fact the next friend request or hello I will get will more than likely be from a state that I have no intention of visiting or just can't see myself being there at any point in time. Considering my intentions to be moved too Canada by 2011, and the fact that I could possibly be moving to a lot of different places between now and then, I can't fathom a relationship working out for me in the near future.

Like I said, right now it is not happening, perhaps in the future...but just as well, I'm not holding my breath on it. Thank you for your insight, as always you have nothing but great things to say. I just don't think what you said here applies to me.

I am beginning to feel the same way. Very soon i wont bother even thinking about dating! Ill just move to a deserted island or something, i dont know.

You tramp you

quitting is always an option for anything in life that one deems difficult.

Not difficult, impossible. Big difference.

the word impossible means something cannot be done. surely you don't think relationships are "impossible" do you?

For a lot of them, yes. For me personally, yes. There are the few that slip through the cracks, but that is such a rare occurence that really love is nothing but a dream or facade. Kind of like Santa Claus, something used only to keep one or the other in check, no real emotion or heart.

The only time I've seen true love is between a parent and child, and even that is failing anymore. More and more children growing up without parents, less and less love in the world. In my opinion a relationship can really only work between parent and child, mind you this view can change, and may very well be different one day. Right now however, that is my view.

The longer I know you, the more I agree with you. And that's kind of strange right there!

I'll say this -- there was a point when it occurred to me that the whole relationship thing is simply more trouble than it's worth.

And, yes, I suppose that's a biased standpoint based on 94 bad ones in a row, but all I really have to go by is my own observations/experiences.

But once I stopped trying to see a relationship as some sort of "prerequisite," as some sort of mandatory arrangement, it hit me that the bottom line is there's just no one out there worth bothering with.

And maybe that sounds harsh, but which makes more sense -- to try to jump back in the pool and endure another series of attempted goat-conversions, or just to admit that there is simply no one out there who can understand and/or deal with someone who refuses to be goatified?

Sure, it would be great to find a truly compatible girlfriend. It would be great to win the lottery, too.

The difference is that lottery tickets exist.

I was waiting for you Lex, figured you would pop on here sometime. How is the lottery working out for you? I won a few dollars off a scratch off a couple of days ago, already doing better than relationships.

if proof of santa claus was "a rare occurence" it still means, nonetheless, that santa claus' existence has been proven. if something is a "rare occurence", that means it falls into the "difficult" category and not the "impossible".

my first post in this thread therefore still stands.

hope you feel better tomorrow

Difficult for some, impossible for others. I've never had and don't believe I will ever get the "rare occurence", if I had the rare occurence it would have worked out and I wouldn't be posting this. I never said it was impossible for everyone, but for the varied few I do think it is.

I know it exists, it just doesn't exist for me.

It doesn't exist for me either. And I agree with you about the love with parent/children, I say that all the time, glad to see someone else sees it.

Embrace an apathetic attitude towards dating and every thing else. See my thread in the Political Forum. Apathy is the key to happiness. be seeing you

Right, plus a lottery ticket is never going to try to turn me into a goat, nor will it send me a plethora of poorly-spelled and grammatically incoherent e-mails presumably belittling me because I refuse to date people with kids.

Far better to just give up on the idea of dating anyone -- let the goatifiers turn their goatific urges elsewhere.

Whatever your beliefs are influence the outcome of want and life decision. Enjoying and loving the life you choose to live is the most important and universal commonality we all should strive for. This may or may not include or pertain to attaining the revelation of another half instituted or not into the life force that is you.

I'm happy, so far in my life that hasn't really done any good for me. Not going to stop me from being happy. I don't really follow the 'your thoughts will be your outcome' idea, I think it is actually laughable as if I think I'm God...I will not suddenly become God, will I?

Although some people follow it and seem to be doing well, I've followed it and it didn't help. Buddhism was fun though.