Timmy Buck Twoshoes from Timbuktu

But what Captain Colombo didn't know was that Timmy Buck had a twin brother Tommy buck and

And a sister Tammy Buck Yutu

who liked to dance the polka while..

...doing the laundry and ironing the sheets... AND she would sing...

elvis songs in a voice that...

would make linda lovless gag

and sounded like broken glass tumbling through a grinder.

and had all the dogs n cats in the 'hood'.....

Gag as you may while tumbling thought the grinder with all dogs and cats in the hood.

Timmy, Tommy & Tammy afraid for their very lives now that Muffy was aware who killed the Col. We must flee to the underground caves that lie below the Manglewood Forest.

Even then In Manglewood Forrest, my trackers are everywhere and we will find the fiend that hurt my poor Col Mustard!!

Well fair Muffins, you had better keep an eye out for those flying monkeymen thingamajiggies that lurk about in the shadows of manglewood forest... If you're not careful they'll catch you and you'll wind up...

being flayed alive and your skin being made into muffins, for the hands on a cold winter day or Umpire Breast Plates. Isn't Karma a b1tch?

Luckily Kowwanda had an ace up her sleeve but it was really her private d1ck...

... her private d1ck, Weed Saint Claire, who's ace lay silently, hidden up her sleeve and tightly wrapped around Kowwanda's arm like a wet anaconda on a frozen maypole... Eyes shifting from across the room, Loose Lips Lisa (first female mobster in the tri-state area to serve as manager of the Glory Hole Casino in Bendover, Alberta) strolled across the disco and pulled out her...

humongous, multi-coloured strap-on. How else was she to keep this motley crue of boys in line? Kowwanda struggles to think, as the venom from her betrayer's fingertips enters her veins.

Muffy has went into hiding wonder what plan she will have once she pops her head back out. Me thinks her and Miss Bett our in on this together we will soon see.

Hurry Loose Lips and bring the secret vial i have hidden in the pocket of strapples you just pulled off! They didn't know about the medicine that Old Sage gave us for just such an occasion as this!
It will be worth the time we have to spend in his cave with him, fulfilling his every fantasy....

I guess neither you, sweet Muffins, nor your two lovely accomplices, Loose Lips aka Dr. Maybe aka lily Mayfair aka Two Shots Lil AND Lady Betts aka Betts Broomhildegard aka Betts Aroff aka Linda Lightheart aka Diamond Digit Dawn notice the small camera hidden amongst the rocks (placed there by your very own most loyal and very private d1ck, I might add) which captured every incredible moment of your sultry display in the dim light of The Old Sage's aka Lenny the Leopard aka Lenny Goldstein aka Golden Tooth Terry aka Sir Lenny Terry, OPP cave... AND that this tawdry film of sensual tom-foolery will be presented in it's unedited entirety before Robert Redford and his fellow judges at the Sundance Film Festival...

Not to worry...dear Clive....we have soooo many aka's no one will ever untangle that mess of squiggly curvasious feline monikers...and we might even win a spot on that new reality show known as Spy Girls Gone Wild!! My privateD1ck has done well by us...but now back to business