Topic: Why do you judge by looks?
dannb's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:10 PM
and im not trying to come across as complaining, I've been single near 5 years (Feb 14th, Yes V-day) I just wonder what I said earlier, If I find someone on this site who wants to date me... great if not Im glad Im connecting with people and thats the honest truth

hellkitten54's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:11 PM

I just don't see why honesty can't come into the picture right away, or at least telling the person, if you aren't interested in them and you read the things they had to say let them know, I guess thats the real thing im saying here... for instance when a user messages me I take the time to read what they had to say, if they said something around the lines of I think you are cute and fun, I would at least reply with a thank you and talk with them, who says that everything on this site has to be about dating, really I just dont understand why people can't connect with someone rather than just look at their profile and say oh... ugly click *Delete*


Look, dont send a message and get butt hurt when someone doesn't respond. Just forget about it and move on. Don't try to rationalize WHY they didn't mail back. Just move on to the next girl. This is what this thread is really about, right?

no photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:11 PM
Physical attraction is part of the biological imperative.

Simply put, it's how we're wired.

directandwrite's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:12 PM

i mean how do you have sex? If your not attracted how enjoyable can that be? I think this question is nonsense and everyone wants someone they find attractive.


Okay...so then are you saying if you were suddenly struck blind you'd stop having sex..because you can't see the "babe" you're with anymore??

Gothlic768's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:13 PM
I've met a lot of nice guys and a lot of assholes.... but neither is gonna work out if I can't bring myself to kiss their ugly mug lol

there has to be physical attraction AND a good pesonality

dannb's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:13 PM
Im saying i'm here for connections, physical/mental/emotional... maybe i got the wrong idea of the site, perhaps it is strictly dating and Im somewhere I don't belong

JoeW99's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:13 PM


i mean how do you have sex? If your not attracted how enjoyable can that be? I think this question is nonsense and everyone wants someone they find attractive.


Okay...so then are you saying if you were suddenly struck blind you'd stop having sex..because you can't see the "babe" you're with anymore??


Such a trap question!

Don't answer that! lol..

Cutiepieforyou's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:14 PM
I need to be attracted to the guy. It is not so much looks for me as the attraction. It is either there or not there.

PATSFAN's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:14 PM



I don't judge by looks. I think it's definitely what's on the inside that counts! flowerforyou



Niceflowerforyou


Hi Pat! Good to see ya on here tonight!

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, true...but tell me how many "hot" people you've met who were total jerks and seemed ugly afterwards?

It's all a matter of personal choice, I know, but why should people knock those who want to get to know others for what's on the inside? Beauty fades, personality lasts forever. :o)



I agree & yet because of looks people keep running into the same type of person, looks are very important to some.

Mr_Music's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:14 PM


i mean how do you have sex? If your not attracted how enjoyable can that be? I think this question is nonsense and everyone wants someone they find attractive.


Okay...so then are you saying if you were suddenly struck blind you'd stop having sex..because you can't see the "babe" you're with anymore??


That's a non-argument. Even blind people learn to adapt and overcome. They learn to let their hands be their "eyes". I'd even be willing to say that blind people can see a hell of a lot better than most sighted people.

Drago01's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:16 PM
Whew... dont touch... this post is on fire!

dannb's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:17 PM

Whew... dont touch... this post is on fire!

I'm glad it is! I didn't expect it to pick up this fast, must have poored some gasoline before I lit the match

papersmile's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:17 PM

I just don't see why honesty can't come into the picture right away, or at least telling the person, if you aren't interested in them and you read the things they had to say let them know, I guess thats the real thing im saying here... for instance when a user messages me I take the time to read what they had to say, if they said something around the lines of I think you are cute and fun, I would at least reply with a thank you and talk with them, who says that everything on this site has to be about dating, really I just dont understand why people can't connect with someone rather than just look at their profile and say oh... ugly click *Delete*

a big difference i've noticed between men and women with regards to internet dating, and maybe just dating in general is that the man (most times) is expecting instant and immediate attraction whereas the woman (in many instances) finds that attraction is something that is built up over many dates and/or emails.

when the man doesn't get the instant reaction that he wants, he stops calling the woman. if he'd persisted, he may have found that her level of interest increased as they got to know each other.

dannb's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:19 PM


I just don't see why honesty can't come into the picture right away, or at least telling the person, if you aren't interested in them and you read the things they had to say let them know, I guess thats the real thing im saying here... for instance when a user messages me I take the time to read what they had to say, if they said something around the lines of I think you are cute and fun, I would at least reply with a thank you and talk with them, who says that everything on this site has to be about dating, really I just dont understand why people can't connect with someone rather than just look at their profile and say oh... ugly click *Delete*

a big difference i've noticed between men and women with regards to internet dating, and maybe just dating in general is that the man (most times) is expecting instant and immediate attraction whereas the woman (in many instances) finds that attraction is something that is built up over many dates and/or emails.

when the man doesn't get the instant reaction that he wants, he stops calling the woman. if he'd persisted, he may have found that her level of interest increased as they got to know each other.
and I think of that and think... how many people out there have just totally ignored a message when possibly that person could have turned out to be "the one" I admit a few years ago I was totally into myself (not sure why at this point) but I totally ignored people, and theose people now turned out to be pretty fun and exciting, I had the chance to date them but I Ignored them, turns out years later they are into the same things as I am and it's to late...

Etrain's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:20 PM
This is the internet...this is free online dating...just about everyone gos by looks...thats the first thing we see is a pic...those without pics usually get passed up...we all have a certain criteria of what we want in a mateflowerforyou

breathless1's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:20 PM



i mean how do you have sex? If your not attracted how enjoyable can that be? I think this question is nonsense and everyone wants someone they find attractive.


Okay...so then are you saying if you were suddenly struck blind you'd stop having sex..because you can't see the "babe" you're with anymore??


Such a trap question!

Don't answer that! lol..


Copy THAT! rofl

What really irks the crap out of me is when guys come on here saying they are *nice guys*. Who are you to judge yourself?

I'd never say I was a *nice guy* to anyone. Hell, look at my profile blog thing, you'll see!

My supposed niceness can only be determined by others after they have spent quality REAL time with me.

But, here's some flowers to help my case! flowers

directandwrite's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:20 PM
I'm just saying, there has to be something more significant than looks that carries a relationship. There has to be a connection deeper than that...because looks can fade, people can go blind, etc. It's all in companionshiop...not physical attractiveness...

no photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:21 PM
well i can still grope....:laughing: No i am saying physical atraction is a major part of sex! Certainly its not everything, but it is a big part. besides i wouldnt want a person that felt i was unattractive physically. This can mean many different things to many people but appearances matter and its not really fair to call someone shallow if they would like someone that they are physically attracted to. this is wise and for the relationship its more healthy. I think it is kinda shallow to say looks dont matter and brains do. dumb people need love too...:laughing: i think just look for a good match mentally and physically and you got a chance for a good relationship.

Mr_Music's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:22 PM
a big difference i've noticed between men and women with regards to internet dating, and maybe just dating in general is that the man (most times) is expecting instant and immediate attraction whereas the woman (in many instances) finds that attraction is something that is built up over many dates and/or emails.

when the man doesn't get the instant reaction that he wants, he stops calling the woman. if he'd persisted, he may have found that her level of interest increased as they got to know each other.


Would this also explain why there's always a line at the women's bathroom, and why they take so long in there? :laughing:

RKISIT's photo
Sat 01/17/09 05:23 PM
we all can accept"not our expectations when the person has qualities we find to be irresistable"...