Community > General Discussion

Topic: Debts
Wanderwhere Joined Tue 11/11/08 Posts: 77	Fri 01/02/09 07:41 AM
Money is the biggest reason relationships fail. Starting off with huge differences in views on moneys, credit, and spending patterns is almost certain to put huge pressures on the relationship. A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money. You are trying to make that relationship swim, and you have a boat anchor tied to your ankle.

Krimsa Joined Fri 04/25/08 Posts: 9960	Fri 01/02/09 07:51 AM
Exactly.

quiet_2008 Joined Sat 08/30/08 Posts: 11138	Fri 01/02/09 07:54 AM
Money is the biggest reason relationships fail. Starting off with huge differences in views on moneys, credit, and spending patterns is almost certain to put huge pressures on the relationship. A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money. You are trying to make that relationship swim, and you have a boat anchor tied to your ankle. I don't consider myself a boat anchor I had a FICO of 750, and now I have a FICO of 8. I'm still the same person. If your so worried about making sure your partner has an equivalant credit score then it kinda seems like elitist snobbery to me

talldub Joined Fri 09/12/08 Posts: 2629	Fri 01/02/09 07:57 AM
Money is the biggest reason relationships fail. Starting off with huge differences in views on moneys, credit, and spending patterns is almost certain to put huge pressures on the relationship. A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money. You are trying to make that relationship swim, and you have a boat anchor tied to your ankle. I don't consider myself a boat anchor I had a FICO of 750, and now I have a FICO of 8. I'm still the same person. If your so worried about making sure your partner has an equivalant credit score then it kinda seems like elitist snobbery to me To me it just seems that they've missed the point on many levels and it just reeks of shallow.

Krimsa Joined Fri 04/25/08 Posts: 9960	Fri 01/02/09 07:58 AM Edited by Krimsa on Fri 01/02/09 07:59 AM
Money is the biggest reason relationships fail. Starting off with huge differences in views on moneys, credit, and spending patterns is almost certain to put huge pressures on the relationship. A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money. You are trying to make that relationship swim, and you have a boat anchor tied to your ankle. I don't consider myself a boat anchor I had a FICO of 750, and now I have a FICO of 8. I'm still the same person. If your so worried about making sure your partner has an equivalant credit score then it kinda seems like elitist snobbery to me I would disagree. Especially when that person is considering marriage. To hide this would be dishonest. To reveal it would allow for measures to be taken to protect the others credit. Thus the "anchor". If the both of you are catapulted into a state of financial limbo and the inability to rent, finance, or make purchases on credit, so help you. Its not very smart.

quiet_2008 Joined Sat 08/30/08 Posts: 11138	Fri 01/02/09 08:12 AM
yeah to hide anything would be dishonest but expecting a person to have an equivalant credit score is just a form of class war. and its hard enough to find a partner as it is without adding more restrictions

Mr_Music Joined Wed 10/22/08 Posts: 10677	Fri 01/02/09 08:14 AM
That's supposed to be the part where "For richer, for poorer" comes in.

Krimsa Joined Fri 04/25/08 Posts: 9960	Fri 01/02/09 08:14 AM
yeah to hide anything would be dishonest but expecting a person to have an equivalant credit score is just a form of class war. and its hard enough to find a partner as it is without adding more restrictions Oh I agree! I never said that. I only advocated for HONESTY. Ive dated men in bankruptcy, had bookies after them, the list goes on...its just the hiding it which will cause problems down the line and people do that very often because they fear disapproval.

talldub Joined Fri 09/12/08 Posts: 2629	Fri 01/02/09 08:15 AM Edited by talldub on Fri 01/02/09 08:15 AM
Money is the biggest reason relationships fail. Starting off with huge differences in views on moneys, credit, and spending patterns is almost certain to put huge pressures on the relationship. A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money. You are trying to make that relationship swim, and you have a boat anchor tied to your ankle. I don't consider myself a boat anchor I had a FICO of 750, and now I have a FICO of 8. I'm still the same person. If your so worried about making sure your partner has an equivalant credit score then it kinda seems like elitist snobbery to me I would disagree. Especially when that person is considering marriage. To hide this would be dishonest. To reveal it would allow for measures to be taken to protect the others credit. Thus the "anchor". If the both of you are catapulted into a state of financial limbo and the inability to rent, finance, or make purchases on credit, so help you. Its not very smart. In the example given it would appear to me that the issue is not hidden "A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money."

Krimsa Joined Fri 04/25/08 Posts: 9960	Fri 01/02/09 08:19 AM Edited by Krimsa on Fri 01/02/09 08:19 AM
Money is the biggest reason relationships fail. Starting off with huge differences in views on moneys, credit, and spending patterns is almost certain to put huge pressures on the relationship. A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money. You are trying to make that relationship swim, and you have a boat anchor tied to your ankle. I don't consider myself a boat anchor I had a FICO of 750, and now I have a FICO of 8. I'm still the same person. If your so worried about making sure your partner has an equivalant credit score then it kinda seems like elitist snobbery to me I would disagree. Especially when that person is considering marriage. To hide this would be dishonest. To reveal it would allow for measures to be taken to protect the others credit. Thus the "anchor". If the both of you are catapulted into a state of financial limbo and the inability to rent, finance, or make purchases on credit, so help you. Its not very smart. In the example given it would appear to me that the issue is not hidden "A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money." If I chose to willingly enter into a MARRIAGE with someone that had irretrievable financial problems and credit than I would be on my own woudnt I? Personal accountability is something I take very seriously in terms of my own life. Aside from that I have distinctly voiced that HONESTY is the best policy when financial concerns are at hand.

SitkaRains Joined Thu 10/09/08 Posts: 17228	Fri 01/02/09 08:20 AM
you mean there are still people who have credit? Some of us do, I know I have one credit card and my debit card.I am very careful on my spending. I have already said I am terrified of debt. I guess growing up with grandparents that lived through the first depression left a huge impact on me. I never put anything on credit while I am paying off the first thing. I.E. snowmachine..car etc. I guess I am weird but raising my children I figured I was their best example of finances.

quiet_2008 Joined Sat 08/30/08 Posts: 11138	Fri 01/02/09 08:22 AM
Money is the biggest reason relationships fail. Starting off with huge differences in views on moneys, credit, and spending patterns is almost certain to put huge pressures on the relationship. A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money. You are trying to make that relationship swim, and you have a boat anchor tied to your ankle. I don't consider myself a boat anchor I had a FICO of 750, and now I have a FICO of 8. I'm still the same person. If your so worried about making sure your partner has an equivalant credit score then it kinda seems like elitist snobbery to me I would disagree. Especially when that person is considering marriage. To hide this would be dishonest. To reveal it would allow for measures to be taken to protect the others credit. Thus the "anchor". If the both of you are catapulted into a state of financial limbo and the inability to rent, finance, or make purchases on credit, so help you. Its not very smart. In the example given it would appear to me that the issue is not hidden "A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money." yeah, that was more what I was replying to. It just sounded kinda snobby

talldub Joined Fri 09/12/08 Posts: 2629	Fri 01/02/09 08:26 AM Edited by talldub on Fri 01/02/09 08:26 AM
Money is the biggest reason relationships fail. Starting off with huge differences in views on moneys, credit, and spending patterns is almost certain to put huge pressures on the relationship. A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money. You are trying to make that relationship swim, and you have a boat anchor tied to your ankle. I don't consider myself a boat anchor I had a FICO of 750, and now I have a FICO of 8. I'm still the same person. If your so worried about making sure your partner has an equivalant credit score then it kinda seems like elitist snobbery to me I would disagree. Especially when that person is considering marriage. To hide this would be dishonest. To reveal it would allow for measures to be taken to protect the others credit. Thus the "anchor". If the both of you are catapulted into a state of financial limbo and the inability to rent, finance, or make purchases on credit, so help you. Its not very smart. In the example given it would appear to me that the issue is not hidden "A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money." If I chose to willingly enter into a MARRIAGE with someone that had irretrievable financial problems and credit than I would be on my own woudnt I? Personal accountability is something I take very seriously in terms of my own life. Aside from that I have distinctly voiced that HONESTY is the best policy when financial concerns are at hand. Yes but if you WILLINGLY chose to do it then where is the problem? Ever hear of this "I, (Bride/Groom), take you (Groom/Bride), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part." Then again, vows mean so little to some people these days

Krimsa Joined Fri 04/25/08 Posts: 9960	Fri 01/02/09 08:31 AM
Money is the biggest reason relationships fail. Starting off with huge differences in views on moneys, credit, and spending patterns is almost certain to put huge pressures on the relationship. A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money. You are trying to make that relationship swim, and you have a boat anchor tied to your ankle. I don't consider myself a boat anchor I had a FICO of 750, and now I have a FICO of 8. I'm still the same person. If your so worried about making sure your partner has an equivalant credit score then it kinda seems like elitist snobbery to me I would disagree. Especially when that person is considering marriage. To hide this would be dishonest. To reveal it would allow for measures to be taken to protect the others credit. Thus the "anchor". If the both of you are catapulted into a state of financial limbo and the inability to rent, finance, or make purchases on credit, so help you. Its not very smart. In the example given it would appear to me that the issue is not hidden "A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money." If I chose to willingly enter into a MARRIAGE with someone that had irretrievable financial problems and credit than I would be on my own woudnt I? Personal accountability is something I take very seriously in terms of my own life. Aside from that I have distinctly voiced that HONESTY is the best policy when financial concerns are at hand. Yes but if you WILLINGLY chose to do it then where is the problem? Ever hear of this "I, (Bride/Groom), take you (Groom/Bride), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part." Then again, vows mean so little to some people these days Isnt that the point here? I am saying I WOULD NOT enter into matrimony with a person who will drag me down in a financial sense. And not only that. I reject the terms of marriage as an independent, self-made woman. I am not entering into some legally binding contract with the state to somehow "solidy" my love for another. Thats ridiculous in my opinion. If someone chooses not to pay their bills on time and destroy their OWN credit is that my problem when I have essentially gone without food (in my past) in order to make those payments and maintain an excellent credit rating?

Wanderwhere Joined Tue 11/11/08 Posts: 77	Fri 01/02/09 08:32 AM
Its not the person who is the boat anchor, its the difference on views of life. Two people, both with bad credit for the same sort of reasons, could get along swimmingly. There are many reasons for why a person has bad credit, and most of them involve a difference in perspective on life from people with lots of money and good credit.

talldub Joined Fri 09/12/08 Posts: 2629	Fri 01/02/09 08:35 AM
Money is the biggest reason relationships fail. Starting off with huge differences in views on moneys, credit, and spending patterns is almost certain to put huge pressures on the relationship. A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money. You are trying to make that relationship swim, and you have a boat anchor tied to your ankle. I don't consider myself a boat anchor I had a FICO of 750, and now I have a FICO of 8. I'm still the same person. If your so worried about making sure your partner has an equivalant credit score then it kinda seems like elitist snobbery to me I would disagree. Especially when that person is considering marriage. To hide this would be dishonest. To reveal it would allow for measures to be taken to protect the others credit. Thus the "anchor". If the both of you are catapulted into a state of financial limbo and the inability to rent, finance, or make purchases on credit, so help you. Its not very smart. In the example given it would appear to me that the issue is not hidden "A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money." If I chose to willingly enter into a MARRIAGE with someone that had irretrievable financial problems and credit than I would be on my own woudnt I? Personal accountability is something I take very seriously in terms of my own life. Aside from that I have distinctly voiced that HONESTY is the best policy when financial concerns are at hand. Yes but if you WILLINGLY chose to do it then where is the problem? Ever hear of this "I, (Bride/Groom), take you (Groom/Bride), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part." Then again, vows mean so little to some people these days Isnt that the point here? I am saying I WOULD NOT enter into matrimony with a person who will drag me down in a financial sense. And not only that. I reject the terms of marriage as an independent, self-made woman. I am not entering into some legally binding contract with the state to somehow "solidy" my love for another. Thats ridiculous in my opinion. If someone chooses not to pay their bills on time and destroy their OWN credit is that my problem when I have essentially gone without food (in my past) in order to make those payments and maintain an excellent credit rating? So if this was the perfect person for you, in ever other sense other than their credit rating then what, you'd pass them by?

Mr_Music Joined Wed 10/22/08 Posts: 10677	Fri 01/02/09 08:36 AM


Krimsa Joined Fri 04/25/08 Posts: 9960	Fri 01/02/09 08:38 AM Edited by Krimsa on Fri 01/02/09 08:39 AM
Money is the biggest reason relationships fail. Starting off with huge differences in views on moneys, credit, and spending patterns is almost certain to put huge pressures on the relationship. A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money. You are trying to make that relationship swim, and you have a boat anchor tied to your ankle. I don't consider myself a boat anchor I had a FICO of 750, and now I have a FICO of 8. I'm still the same person. If your so worried about making sure your partner has an equivalant credit score then it kinda seems like elitist snobbery to me I would disagree. Especially when that person is considering marriage. To hide this would be dishonest. To reveal it would allow for measures to be taken to protect the others credit. Thus the "anchor". If the both of you are catapulted into a state of financial limbo and the inability to rent, finance, or make purchases on credit, so help you. Its not very smart. In the example given it would appear to me that the issue is not hidden "A person with good credit and money would have to be masochistic to willingly enter into a relationship with someone with bad credit and, necessarily, no money." If I chose to willingly enter into a MARRIAGE with someone that had irretrievable financial problems and credit than I would be on my own woudnt I? Personal accountability is something I take very seriously in terms of my own life. Aside from that I have distinctly voiced that HONESTY is the best policy when financial concerns are at hand. Yes but if you WILLINGLY chose to do it then where is the problem? Ever hear of this "I, (Bride/Groom), take you (Groom/Bride), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part." Then again, vows mean so little to some people these days Isnt that the point here? I am saying I WOULD NOT enter into matrimony with a person who will drag me down in a financial sense. And not only that. I reject the terms of marriage as an independent, self-made woman. I am not entering into some legally binding contract with the state to somehow "solidy" my love for another. Thats ridiculous in my opinion. If someone chooses not to pay their bills on time and destroy their OWN credit is that my problem when I have essentially gone without food (in my past) in order to make those payments and maintain an excellent credit rating? So if this was the perfect person for you, in ever other sense other than their credit rating then what, you'd pass them by? No of course not. Would I marry them? Absolutely not. Trust me, this situation has come up several times and upon each proposal, I refused for my own good. Would I date them if they were honest? Yes. Some women would not.

Wanderwhere Joined Tue 11/11/08 Posts: 77	Fri 01/02/09 08:42 AM
If they were a perfect match in every way but their perspective on the way they spend/save/handle their money, they wouldn't be a perfect match. I can see being in a relationship with them, but marriage??? Hell no. Marriage is almost entirely an economic partnership.

talldub Joined Fri 09/12/08 Posts: 2629	Fri 01/02/09 08:46 AM
So if this was the perfect person for you, in ever other sense other than their credit rating then what, you'd pass them by? No of course not. Would I marry them? Absolutely not. Trust me, this situation has come up several times and upon each proposal, I refused for my own good. Would I date them if they were honest? Yes. Some women would not. Wow. You just met perhaps the one person on this earth that could make you happier than anyone one else, who would always be there for you, who'd never screw you over and you have the passion of a wet fish for them! Have you ever considered that by helping the person (this hypothetical person) that you might pull them up the ladder a bit and ultimately you'd come out stronger??! I do hope that your credit rating is by your bed side when you're terminally ill or there to support you when your home has burned to the ground. After all, a credit rating is just so good at comforting people, listening to their problems, helping them to become more than what they would be on their own.