...."missionaries" knocking on your door and getting all haughty with you when you try to politely tell them that you're an unbeliever and that you have your reasons for being thus?

I hope this forum works out and we don't have 'missionaires' sneaking in with sock puppets to disrupt it.

-Kerry O.

Smile and say, "Sorry, I'm not interested."

I really enjoy wasting their time. So I get that real excited look and I tell them. Wow, I can't your here. PLEASE let me share my experience with you.

I begin by telling them about how church never made sense to me, as a child, and my struggle to undertand. All the churches I visited, etc. And each time them they interrupt I just say, "oh yea, and let me tell you this. I just keep building on the story, year of my life. Then when it seems Im loosing them, I tell them, oh wait, I'm just getting to the revelation.

Then I go into great, explicit detail about the epiphany I suddeny had and how the weight of the world seemed to lift from my shoulders... They usually gain a bit of interest back at that point. I spend some time building it up, till I'm about to loose them again then I spit out

It was an amazing feeling, a sense of relief to finally say out loud. Da mn I'm an athiest, that's why I can't believe this sh t, and as they're, nearly, running away, I hold up my arm and scream halleluia, I'm free, free at last from the oppression.

Then I just go inside and close the door.

It's kinda sad, becasue the last time that happened was about 5 years ago. I see them all still, going door to door, but my door is no longer pounded on....

TRUE STORY!

If they wake me up I tell them to get a life and slam the door in their face. Other times I tell them you won't change my mind and I won't change yours. Then I offer them a refreshment and send them on their way.

Tell them you worship the devil...if they start to go into a preach with you start mumbling a mix of oh's and ah's to form some sort of word. Two things come out of this from my experience; 1: They will stare at you with their mouths open wide, or 2: They will run...try it with Mormon's.

I live in a predominantly muslim country, and I dont get missionaries here ....

Although there are a small minority of xtians here, they tend to keep themselves to themselves.

Back in the UK, I would just say no thanks.

The only time I got annoyed with one, was when I was in a deep conversation with a friend and an "Elder" approached me, and Im ashamed to say, I did use the terms "sex" and "travel" in the same sentence.

I must have a million snarky lines to use on them, but I almost always chicken out because a lot of them are nice folks.

Yet, every once in a while you get a Mormon with attitude or a Xtian who uses the Creationism argument who, when you tell them you're an agnostic or an atheist, just won't take no for an answer.

So when the last one who got me out of bed on a Saturday morning to pull his "Well who do you think made all this?" with an expansive wave of his arms, I told him "Sorry, I chose MENSA instead."

Family is the worst, though. Especially when they hand you those creepy tracts Xtian orgs like Coral Ridge Ministries sells their churches by the boatload.

Myself, I think it's rude to go door-to-door hawking one's religious beliefs. Can you just imagine how the Fundies would react if atheists did it? "Hello, I'm here for the Evil Atheist Conspiracy and we're asking for donations so we can buy more tracts to distribute like this one."

Bet THAT would go over like a screen door in a submarine, eh?

-Kerry O.

Well that was fun - nice ideas, good experiences. I will say, that once I befriended two old ladies. I swear they were lesbians, but to the rest of the JW's they were just two old maids. They stopped by every month or so for a couple years, till I left home. They were forbidden to see or speak with me (my questions raised the hair on the little necks of the Brothers) But the ladies decided that as long as we didn't discuss religion they could remain my friend. HONESTLY, I think they had gaydar and new my propensity to be lesbian long before I realized myself - and I think they were hoping to stick around long enough to help me. But I left and I never saw them again. Sad, they were so sweet.

I am never rude to any missionaries who comes to my home because I know they are only doing what their religion tells them to do. I am polite and listen to what they have to say and take any literature they have to offer. My Sister who is only 12 likes reading the stuff they leave. She is still making her own decisions about religion and I want her to be informed.

I like to 'stump' the Jehova witness ppl. I answer the door and polite ask them (as this is factual)..."it says in your system that only 144,000 ppl will make it to heaven--why on earth are you so bent on 'recruiting' ppl to your religion--thus lessing your chance to get in?"

I sure as hell know that if there was a 'limit' of the ppl that could get thru the pearly gates--id keep that secret on the hush hush

I live in "Mormon Country" Utah. I was raised LDS and so I do understand their perspective. They believe with their whole hearts, well, at least some of them do, that their faith is right and proper. Not only that, but when you have "the one and only true church" rammed down your throat every Sunday you really start to believe it. They're not there to annoy you and as corny as it sounds they just want to "save" you. I've come to realize that most people don't believe in their faiths because they think it's the best thing in the world, it's mostly that they're afraid to not believe. Hell is pretty big deterrent for millions. I used to be one of them.

It's a certain level of apathy I suppose, I don't care if they believe what they do, for some people, religion is a really good thing, it's how they stay together, and their faith in their God is what gives them strength. There was a time I thought I would be a jerk and come up with retorts or try to convince them why they were "wrong", but honestly, who am I to say what is right?

I'm cool with religion, I just don't want it in my life, nor do I want to talk to them about it or why I've chosen my life as it is. My general trick is to wave at the missionaries. They see me go home and because I'm being friendly I think they assume I'm already a member. Either way, they never knock on my door. I did have Relief Society come to my door once, but I told them I wasn't a member and I'd prefer them to not come back, and I haven't seen them since. Unless they're being rude people are people, I don't have a reason to be rude either. I don't believe in Christ the demi-God, but I do believe the man existed, and I think he had it right in love for everyone. We, the missionaries and I, may not see eye to eye, but I've got no hate for them, also knowing they have no hate for me.

Just some thoughts.

and.....
done.

i'm not gonna lie.. we're scraed as heck of 'em over here. when we catch a glimpse of them working their way through the houses in our neighbourhood we run. we run upstairs, ignore the door and peek through the curtains to see if they've left yet.

Usually I just smile & say "I am not interested , have a nice day" as nicely as I can & close the door before they can say anything else.

The last time I was in a really bad mood, I did not open the door but yelled "no" in my best "bad dog" voice. It was very effective, he left quickly bible under arm & tail between legs.

I have no hate for them, but I don't like being disturbed. I know where the church is if I wanted to go. Sometimes I wonder what would happen if I went door to door trying to get people to believe what I believe. Maybe after I get home from work at Midnight.

I don't like being disturbed either because I hate explaining myself over and over again, hence the reason I picked up the trick of waving. You've got to look busy though, like you're on your way to doing something else, or they might take it as an invite.

Where I live, there are a lot of bible thumpers knocking on my door. I usually don't answer it, unless I'm feeling frisky, then I answer the door and listen for a moment and say nothing and close the door in their face. It really pisses me off when I'm trying to get my son down for a nap and they knock, I'm not so nice then.

I'd have to agree with smile and politely tell them youre not intersted. As a child I used the term agnostic as a self defintion and was intent on feeling supieror when the oppurtunity arose like the example provided. Now Ive grown some and and to me it feels like arguing with someone about the existance of santa claus. If it works for you I'm happy, if you want a discussion I love all aspects of human study and philosophy, usually though intersting discussions about the social implications of religion are only had by other agnostics, there is no debate as to the existance, example.- Two agnostics discussing the existance of whether or not god exists "You think theres a god" "nah really doubt it" " me too" end of discussion.

I was baptized when I was 8 years old, haven't gone to church since, and for some reasons the mormons STILL have me in their books. I'm really polite, they're human beings just like the rest of us, but I always turn them down.

sh!t, I just giggle at them
and talk faster than they can

pretty soon they go away