If you fly in, I pick up at the airport.
would be a great thing.
Questions mail me.

Morning all

good morning all

good morning all

Good Evening All

Yes I am widowed too. For 3 years now. we were married 18 years. Just started talking online and dating since January. At first never again now things seem to be changing my heart is getting softer again. Carol

Hi Carol, welcome to the widows/ers thread!

I am very sorry for your loss. I lost my husband to cancer 9 yrs ago. He was 37 and I was 35 at the time. We have a lot of w/w here both young and old. Please feel free to post away!

Good Wednesday Morning All!!!


Hope you all have a great day!

I am a widower. I lost my wife to cancer four (4) years ago. I gather from reading, I am a newbie, but I sure don't feel that way.

How do you really get back into the game? I mean finding someone new? Is it as hard I have experienced or am I just going about it wrong?

I'm not a youngster, but I have a lot to give and a lot of years to give. I have a meaningful job, I have family close by and see them often, but there is just something missing.

Have any of you avoided cleaning out your deceased spouses belongings?

I have I have a 3 bay garage full of his stuff. The garage is a mess. I need to clean it. Some stuff I don't even know what it is. This has been a good excuse for me not to clean it. I can't even park my car in there. I do my fiberglass work in there, but just blot out all the stuff that was his. How do you finally let go and get rid of it?

Also, we had seperate closets. I could use the space of the walk in...but , his stuff is there. What do you do with your deceased spouses clothes? It has been 2 1/2 yrs. I think it's time.

It has been four years and I still have all of her stuff. I think if I get rid of it part of me will die. That isn't true of course but that is how you feel. We have to realize we were individuals before we met and we still are, but we are better individuals because of that person we loved and we believe left far too early.

Your poetry is really nice, I think you will do OK. You seem like a really nice person. God bless.

Hi everybody
How is everyone doing?
My husband has been gone 12 years and I still have a lot of his things. Maybe we are keeping them around because at least we have something of them left.I don't know. Maybe we will never get rid of everything ,but we need to do what works best for ourselves.
Take care

Angel, I waited 2 yrs before starting to clean her things out. After I started I experienced a sense of relief, EVERYTIME I sent some of her stuff out. Now I only keep what is really special to me. It hurts to do, but I felt better after.

Waves hello to everyone--I'm back..yay....Hello Carol and Greatguy Nice to meet you both. I'm Carolyn

Angel- I didn't have any choices right after my husband's death. I had to move just a few weeks after, and from a 2 story home on the lake to a small 1 bedroom apartment- I was rather limited. I kept my shrank and grandfather clock, and whatnots from everywhere..but tools, and everything else I just couldn't make room for and it went into the auction..it literally ripped my heart out. In less than a month I lost the love of my life- our home, all his belongngs, my wedding rings, his boat..it seemed like everything having to do with him was being torn away. It's been 5 yrs almost now..and I wish I would have had more time to go slower.

When my Mom and Nanny passed..we all decided to send all her clothes to goodwill, to help people that needed clothes. I couldn't do it, so my Aunt took them for us.

Thank you my husband had M.D. He was 45 now I am 50 starting over again. And what a dating world out there. We didn't have computer back then funny lol.

Ahh thankyou Carolyn that must of been rough for you how are things now? I also lost my younger sister she was 38 at the time and going through her things was harder on me than my husband but she died first. She was 8 years younger One person I always thought would be around in times like these. Nice to meet you too. smiles

Carolyn

My wife had been sick for about a year, she thought it was Irritable Bowek Syndrome. We moved into a smaller apartment at her request and she used to make statements like "This is a good place for you if something happens to me" etc. It seemed that she made a concerted effort to ensure everything was perfext. She bought new furniture, she asked me to take her places we only talked about before, she made peace with my family which didn't ever seem possible. When she finally was diagnosed with colon cancer, it had already spread,

Believe it or not, she had a major operation and chemo and it disappeared and she went back to work for three months. Then we found out it had spread to her liver. This time the chemo didn't work and she had a liver operation. Again the cancer was all gone, but within 10 days, on the night she looked at me and told me she loved me and thanked me for being in her life, she collapsed and I drove her to the hospital. I was there next to her bed in the emergency room and she said "Peter, go home and rest, you have the rest of your life ahead of you. I will be alright." I did and that is the last time I saw her alive.

I have felt guilty ever since that I wasn't with her when she died, but I think she wanted me to prepare for the rest of my life knowing hers was ending.

Greatguy, nice to meet you. Welcome I am sorry for your loss