My number in the line is 173,950!!

That figures!

OW...tht's gonna leave a mark!

Not if they are massaged properly.

The Gospel According to David SHOULD BE in the Good Book!!

Lord! So far today I have not been greedy, gossipy, nasty, selfish or over indulgent. However, in a few minutes I will get out of bed and from there I will be needing a little help.
Amen.

Be right back...gotta make a Bee double E double R U N!!!

He must not have realized what he was stepping in.

Is it a "Brown Bag" lunch, or do they serve a buffet?

A horse breeder phoned up a stud farm and asked if he could send over a representative to check out the stock, with a view to buying a horse.

He said the representative would be easily recognized because he was a midget with a speech impediment. The stud groom agreed and waited until the midget knocked on the door.

"Hello, I've come to check out your hortheth", said the midget.

"Sure, do you want a male horse or a female horse?" asked the stud groom.

"A female horth, pleath" said the midget, so off they went to the paddock to look at the horses. One lovely well bred filly caught the midgets eye.

"Can I check her ears pleath ?" said the midget - so the stud groom
lifted up the midget to check the horses ears, then put him back down.

"Nith ears.......... now can I look at her eyth, pleath ?" - once again the stud groom lifted up the midget to check the horses eyes, then put him down again.

"Nith eyth ............ now I'd like to thee her twat pleath"
The stud groom had had enough, so he lifted up the midget and shoved him head first into the horses 'you know what' and put him back down again.

The midget coughed and spluttered, and then said....................

"Perhapth I should rephwase that...... can I see her wun awound a
widdle bit ?"

I'll have to pass that one on to my cousin. He's a pharmacist.