Yeah........that job was a bit**!

A doctor is going about his business, with a rectal thermometer tucked behind his ear. He goes into a staff meeting to discuss the day's activities, when a co-worker asks why he has a thermometer behind his ear. In a wild motion he grabs for the thermometer, looks at it and exclaims, "Damn, some arsehole has my pen!"

Doctor: "Maám, are you sexually active?"

Woman: "Well, sometimes I is.....and sometimes I just lays there!"

Two blonde carpenters were working on a house. The one who was nailing down siding would reach into his nail pouch, pull out a nail and either toss it over his shoulder or nail it in. The other, figuring this was worth looking into, asked, "Why are you throwing those nails away"? " The first guy explained, "If I pull a nail out of my pouch and it's pointed toward me, I throw it away çause it's defective. If it's pointed toward the house, then I nail it in!" The second guy got completely upset and yelled, "You moron! The nails pointed toward you aren't defective! They're for the other side of the house!"

A depressed bonde decided to commit suicide by hanging herself from a tree in the park. A few days later, a man was walking his dog and spotted her hanging from the tree. He asks the blonde what she is doing and she replies, "I'm hanging myself." The guy says, "You're supposed to put the noose around your neck, not your waist." The blonde replied, "I tried that, but, I couldn't breathe...."

My prayers are with you gethappy! I lost my sister just a year ago to cancer.........I know the sadness and heartache you are going through. Be strong for her!

Soooooooooo sad!! Where does all this sadness come from?

While out one morning in the park, a jogger found a brand new tennis ball, and, seeing no one around that it might belong to, he slipped it into the pocket of his shorts.

Later, on his way home, he stopped at the pedestrian crossing, waiting for the lights to change. A blonde girl standing next to him eyed the large bulge in his shorts. "What's that?" she asked, her eyes gleaming with lust. "Tennis ball," came the breathless reply. "Oh," said the bonde girl sympathetically, "that must be painful. I had tennis elbow once."

good one, jwaddy!

Maybe you should talk to the guy and tell him for the pet's sake to put him out of his misery, humanly. I can't see anyone making a dog walk when it's in pain, that's terrible!!

This is a very nice poem! I know exactly where you're coming from on this one! Keep writing, you do a terrific job!

I'm happy, happy Joy, Joy and I love chips and those little sweet midget pickles together! Yummmmmmmm

A blonde goes into the drug store to buy some condoms because her friend told her that she should learn about practicing safe sex. She walks up to the pharmacist and asks, "How much for a box of rubbers?" "They're six dollars for a box of three," he replies, "Plus sixty cents for the tax." "Oh," replies the bonde, "I always wondered how they kept them on.....!!!"

You have my prayers and my blessings!

I don't find it offensive........and everyone does have a right to their own religion. But we are all Americans and we should proudly say so whether it be in prayer or in a pledge! PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN!!!

Sorry to hear about that.....maybe the jail will scare him enough to know not to do it ever again or to get into any other trouble. Talk to him and maybe he just needs his dad around more. Just a guess. Good luck to you.

My thoughts exactly!

Beautiful poem!

Very nice K2.......I agree that we've all been hurt, but life goes on and eventually we find happiness again.