I specificly said "IF" I didn't say it was labeled that, I know what I wrote
....and that was in regards to "durtyduck's" response

anyway, thank you LADIES your responses!!!!!

....and for some reason I have the feeling if it was labeled "LADIES EYES ONLY, GUYS DON'T READ" you would read it anyway durtydduck

what does wanting to meet a man have to with my question?

Is there anyway to bring on a period?
Maybe just start it a day or 2 early?

Or how do you stop it if it jumps right in your plans?

Thanks for any advice

BTW....I'm not on the pills

Thank you guys

How do you find a blind man at a nudist camp?




It aint hard!!

A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her,
So she goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment
Unexpectedly and when she opens the door she finds him
In the arms of a redhead.
Well, the blonde is really angry.
She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so,
She is overcome with grief.
She takes the gun and puts it to her head.
The boyfriend yells, 'No, honey, don't do it!!!'
The blonde replies, 'Shut up, you're next!'

A lady was giving her 3y old son a bath, curious he asked his mom, ( holding his n**ts )"are these my brains?"
"Not yet, said his mom, not yet"

It was mother's day, so little Timmy asked his dad, "dad, which one is more important, mother's day or father's day?"
His dad replied, "son,mother's day does not come till 9 months after father's night"

She came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman. The wife was VERY upset!
'You are a disrespectful pig!' she cried. 'How dare you do this to me -a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce straight away!'
And he replied: 'Hang on just a minute luv, so at least I can tell you what happened'
'Fine, go ahead', she sobbed, 'but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!'

And he began: 'Well, I was getting into the car to drive home and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty.
She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.

Since she needed a good clean-up I suggested a shower and while she was doing that I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw them away. Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't wear because you say they are too tight. I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't wear because I don't have good taste.

I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't wear just to annoy her and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a pair like them.'
He took a quick breath and continued: 'She was so grateful for my understanding and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said

'Please........do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?'

Have you ever found it hard to say "I love you?"
What do you do when someone looks you in the eye and say I love you, and you just can't say it back, maybe because you just don't feel it "yet" or you just aren't comfortable saying it.
What, if anything can you say?

And this is funny how?

What did the vagina say to the condom?

Take one guess????
Think about it.............


"If you screw up and break, you'll be out of a job for 9 months!!"

On a chain of beautiful islands in the middle of nowhere, the following people were stranded:

Two Italian men and one Italian woman; Two French men and one French woman; Two German men and one

German woman; Two Greek men and one Greek woman; Two English men and one English woman; Two

Bulgarian men and one Bulgarian woman; Two Japanese men and one Japanese woman; Two Chinese men and

one Chinese woman; Two Irish men and one Irish woman; Two American men and one American woman.

One month later, on these absolutely stunning deserted islands in the middle of nowhere, the following things have occurred:

One Italian man killed the other Italian man for the Italian woman.

The two French men and the French woman are living happily together in a menage a trois.

The two German men have a strict weekly schedule of alternating visits with the German woman.

The two Greek men are sleeping with each other and the Greek woman is cleaning and cooking for them.

The two English men are waiting for someone to introduce them to the English woman.

The two Bulgarian men took one look at the Bulgarian woman and started swimming to another island.

The two Japanese have faxed Tokyo and are awaiting instructions.

The two Chinese have opened a convenience store, restaurant, laundry, and have gotten the woman pregnant in order to supply employees for their store.

The two Irish men divided the island into north and south and set up a distillery. They do not remember if sex is in the picture because it gets somewhat foggy after a few liters of coconut whiskey. However, they are satisfied because the English aren't having any fun.

The two American men are contemplating suicide, because the American woman will not shut up and complains relentlessly about her body, the true nature of feminism, what the sun is doing to her skin, how she can do anything they can do, the necessity of fulfillment, the equal division of household chores, how sand and palm trees make her look fat, how her last boyfriend respected her opinion and treated her nicer than they do, how her relationship with her mother is the root of all her problems and why didn't they bring a damn cell phone so she could call 911 and get them all rescued off this Godforsaken deserted island in the middle of freaking nowhere so she can get her nails done and go shopping.

THAT'S HILARIOUS DUDE!

Sparky.......my thoughts exactly....
when does the funny part come

A man went on a airplane and took a seat by the window.
A stranger came and sat beside him.
As soon as the plane ascended the stranger put his ipod on and started
listening to some music.
The man said "excuse me sir, I heard that the flight will go much faster
if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger" the man
replied "ok".......taking his ipod off......"what would you like to
discuss?"
The man replied, "well lets see....Nuclear power"
The stranger said "first let me ask you something,a donkey a cow and a
deer all eat grass right, yet a deer excretes little pellets, a cow
turns out flat patties and a donkey produces clumps, why do you suppose
that is?"
"Geez said the stranger, I have no idea"
"Well then said the stranger, how the hell do you feel qualified to
discuss nuclear power when you don't know S***T!!!!

My prayers goes out to the families of those lost. May God be with them
in this their time of sorrow and pain.

say it in Jamaican, "mi naa go no whe"