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Topic: any advice? or thoughts?
KELLYLS30's photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:18 PM
Edited by KELLYLS30 on Sat 01/26/08 09:18 PM
i am in a situation right now, and i am at a loss...kinda.

i met someone here and really liked him. after talking here and on the phone he invited me to go visit him on a wed. night. i told him i had to be back home by sat(but nly for 1 day). and he said he would come with me so we could have a lot of time to get to know each other and then return to his town i made the 4 hour drive, arrived at 1 a.m. i am usually a nervous person when meeting someone, but i felt totally calm like this was my place. he gave me a big bear hug, and a kiss that sent electricity all through my body!!!!!! we talked awhile, and then slept a couple of hours. NOTHING ELSE HAPPENED!!!

he went to to work and i stayed at the house. that afternoon a woman walked in the door. that is when things got confusing. she said she was his sister-in-law and that she had dated him once but preferred his brother.....came to find out it was his girlfriend of 2 years.

she wanted me to be there when he came home...he was embarrassed , but begged me not to leave. he said he no longer loved her and he thought she had left him for good....she got upset and said he took it too far((you see, she put up his profile on here)).and she keep putting up other profiles for him on dating sites.

he went outside with me when i was leaving and BEGGED me not to leave. and kissed me again--long and hard. i have been married but i can honestly say i have never in my life felt what i felt that when he kissed me.

but against all that i was feeling, i came home. that was before christmas. he continues to call me on a regular basis asking me to move down there...but erases most of the calls. he has got caught a couple of times and she has called me to find out what is going on. ii am completely honest with her. he told her during one of those conversations that he wanted to be with me. but she aint budging. he keeps telling me that if i come down there we will stay in a hotel until we can find a place together. i think he wants me to be part of choosing the place, but i refuse to go until he has his own place.

i dont know if i am being played??? cuz i think he would try to play with someone closer rather than so far away.

im thinking about giving him a time frame to find his own place and if he dont by then, then im done.
am i crazy?

southern_bee's photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:20 PM
**** girl kick his not butt to the curb thats too much drama..move in?hell no..you can do way better


RUN RUN FAR AWAY!

JaceKnows's photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:21 PM
Oh girl, you gotta be waaaaay smarter than to want to continue this, right? Whatever he and her have, it is NO place to put your feelings in the middle of! He's doing this with her, in a year, he'll be doing it to you with someone else. To your own self be true, be smart, trust your instincts! Good luck!

MsTeddyBear2u's photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:22 PM
If he really did'nt want the other lady in his life she would not be there.
For God sake do not move there lady!
You are being played big time! noway

Big_Jim's photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:22 PM
Invoke destruction on his pathetic soul!!

Deny him his carnal desires!

Make his life an effegy of HELL!!!

May the Dark Lord be with you!

misty_57's photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:25 PM
Looks like a hurt waiting to happen Kelly. There are other guys who will make you feel that way that do NOT have others on the line noway

fastlinnie's photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:28 PM
run don!t look backnoway

livelife68's photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:29 PM
I'd stop this insanity immediately. Get away from him. sounds like to much trouble. just gonna end up breaking your heartbrokenheart

KELLYLS30's photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:29 PM
but if you were looking to play would you play with someone 4 hours away or someone closer to home that could maybe benefit you?????????????????

and i think if i give a certain amount of time and he dont make a move, then that shows me that he is content where i he is.....but what if he really does leave it all behind so that he would be free to get to know someone else????

deltasissy's photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:30 PM
he wants to have his cake and eat it too

he is using one of u as a security blanket, in case one doesn't work out

i say drop him

it's not right to do two women like that

he doesn't have courage or he would have dropped her by now if he really was into you


livelife68's photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:31 PM
chances are if he did it when you were four hours away he'll do it when your only an hour away.

lifestooshort6's photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:32 PM
run away fast!!
it sounds as though he's already breaking your heart...no "electricity" is worth that.
doubt means DON'T

Good Luck, Hun

Jim519's photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:36 PM
shoot him

no photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:37 PM

but if you were looking to play would you play with someone 4 hours away or someone closer to home that could maybe benefit you?????????????????

and i think if i give a certain amount of time and he dont make a move, then that shows me that he is content where i he is.....but what if he really does leave it all behind so that he would be free to get to know someone else????
Hello, WHEN SHE showed up at the house,,,"THAT" showed YOU his "NOT" content,,ok??
Move on or be USED and HURT...frown indifferent :heart:

He will just try and talk sooooooo sincere then get you to act and move in together,,,just to be coming home to FIND HIS NEW girlfriend in bed with him....:cry:

KELLYLS30's photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:42 PM
Edited by KELLYLS30 on Sat 01/26/08 09:42 PM
does it not say something on her part that she keeps putting profiles on the internet with his info, and his pic.....she is doing it because they are in english and he dont speak much english at all. i have an inside view and this is all being done while he is at work.

would you do that to someone you love?

no photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:43 PM
The gal isn't holding a gun to his head...if he wanted to have nothing to do with her, he'd be outta there. You want/deserve someone who would move heaven and earth to be with you...this guy isn't it sweetie. Good luck!flowerforyou

Moondark's photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:45 PM
Looks like he thought it was over and she even helped him set up the online profiles. Like she wanted him to move on. Now she doesn't want to let him go. But he isn't strong enough to stand up to her.

No, I don't think you are being played.

Yes, I do think you should get out. The last thing anyone needs is drama of any sort.

You say she showed up at his house. Then you say he said you two could stay at a hotel until finding a place. Sound like his house wasn't really his house after all. Is it their house? In that case, he has to take control of his life and get out before he can move on. Until that happens, there is no place for in it it.

Tell him if you are still available once he gets his life together, you might consider it, but until then, you can't be in the middle of this drama and that you will continue to look around.

KELLYLS30's photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:46 PM
like she has put up 3 profiles in the last week on dating sites...for him!!

no photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:46 PM

does it not say something on her part that she keeps putting profiles on the internet with his info, and his pic.....she is doing it because they are in english and he dont speak much english at all. i have an inside view and this is all being done while he is at work.

Its sounds like SOMETHING way to out of control to be involved with,,,,,STRANGE and twisted,,,for her to "WANT" to do that for her GUY!!!! No sense to make of it, and he has to have some guy friends who could show him or do a profile for him,,,but THEN AGAIN,,,How the hell does HE TALK in emails then,,,,through HER????? Yuk,,,
A three way that YOU don't even KNOW YOUR HAVING,,,lol,,,lol
Thats all ate up!!!indifferent

JaceKnows's photo
Sat 01/26/08 09:47 PM
Any advice, any thoughts.... well, we gave some advice and thoughts. You CAN justify things any way you want to, that IS your right. And while you might have an inside perspective, remember, we all have an OUTSIDE perspective on this. From what it SOUNDS like, whether he speaks English or not, whether she posts profiles of him or not.. you probably do NOT need to be involved in whatever is going on. But... this is just me, anti-drama man, and my perspective. (=

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