Topic: looks or personality??
Moondark's photo
Fri 01/25/08 12:56 PM

if someone is really physically unattractive, then there is no amount of personality that could save it. but vice versa if someone has a really terrible personality, there is no amount of good looks that could save it.

Gotta have at least a little of both...preferably more personality if I had to choose one.


I disagree. I had a friend that was rather unattractive. But so interesting intellectually. One day I suddenly realized that I was attracted to him. It was personality, intellect, creativity, and uniqueness that eventually overrode the fact that he was rather unattractive.

Probably why it is good to be friends first. And I don't base friendship on looks.

ShyKBear's photo
Fri 01/25/08 12:59 PM
Now wait I didn't say that "most men" maybe I'm just too young to open my big mouth....Sorrysad



See I think men see this differently than women do. Me personally, I go for personality; it more important than looks, but then again attraction plays a roll. Doesn't mean they have to be prince charming.

For most men, it's all about looks and figure; it almost the first thing they look for...if you can't flaunt it...NEXT!

:wink: huh


Thanks for the broad generalization, men everywhere love being pigeonholed into a class of neanderthals who only care about a woman's measurements.

no photo
Fri 01/25/08 12:59 PM

Ok i am giving this a shot
I took all the pic's of me off
My profile now let see who want's
To be my Friend with out knowing
What i look like just a test in the real world
this is a great idea..love to know what happensdrinker

LadyOfMagic's photo
Fri 01/25/08 01:02 PM
The men that I've seen look for absolute 100% perfect 10s..They want EVERYTHING..you have to be beautiful,kind,have money or the abiliity to go out and get it/make it,have to be home to raise the kids and clean the house, AND still be able to attend to HIS needs..if you can't do that then..buhbye.

KennethP5206's photo
Fri 01/25/08 01:02 PM

Now wait I didn't say that "most men" maybe I'm just too young to open my big mouth....Sorrysad



See I think men see this differently than women do. Me personally, I go for personality; it more important than looks, but then again attraction plays a roll. Doesn't mean they have to be prince charming.

For most men, it's all about looks and figure; it almost the first thing they look for...if you can't flaunt it...NEXT!

:wink: huh


Thanks for the broad generalization, men everywhere love being pigeonholed into a class of neanderthals who only care about a woman's measurements.
always be honest and say what you mean, and mean what you say

no photo
Fri 01/25/08 01:03 PM

Now wait I didn't say that "most men" maybe I'm just too young to open my big mouth....Sorrysad



See I think men see this differently than women do. Me personally, I go for personality; it more important than looks, but then again attraction plays a roll. Doesn't mean they have to be prince charming.

For most men, it's all about looks and figure; it almost the first thing they look for...if you can't flaunt it...NEXT!

:wink: huh


Thanks for the broad generalization, men everywhere love being pigeonholed into a class of neanderthals who only care about a woman's measurements.




OK wait ... don't be sorrysadflowerforyou ... WE are asking opinions and everyone is entitled to one ,K ??:wink: ... I personally think you are incorrect BUT, it snot the first thing, and its the same for girls meeting a guy for the first time, BEFORE he has a chance to dazzle them with his wit, they "SEE" him first ... right ??

Totage's photo
Fri 01/25/08 01:05 PM

rite..tell me folks ..do you go for looks first or personality? often enough we could be chatting with people from one day to the next and think god i actually fancy this person, they are so funny and nice.yet not really a looker but i dont give a dam!!theres just something there that makes my heart go boom!! lol know what i mean? personally i go for personality if they are a looker as well then great but it doesnt bother me!


I tend to go for looks first.

deltasissy's photo
Fri 01/25/08 01:05 PM
Edited by deltasissy on Fri 01/25/08 01:05 PM
I'm in the prime of my life, and when I see a hot guy walk by me or come up to me, some kinda something awful triggers this response throughout my whole body that just makes me want to

pounce

and for that, I say looks.

Catch me in a few years, and I am sure these hormones will have settled down a bit and I would most certainly answer differently.

ShyKBear's photo
Fri 01/25/08 01:05 PM

The men that I've seen look for absolute 100% perfect 10s..They want EVERYTHING..you have to be beautiful,kind,have money or the abiliity to go out and get it/make it,have to be home to raise the kids and clean the house, AND still be able to attend to HIS needs..if you can't do that then..buhbye.


You couldn't have said that better; that's what I meant... flowerforyou

soxfan94's photo
Fri 01/25/08 01:08 PM

Now wait I didn't say that "most men" maybe I'm just too young to open my big mouth....Sorrysad



No harm, no foul. I agree that some men are like that, and to an extent most men generally consider looks first...but I wouldn't say that they base it solely or mostly on looks.
And also, there are plenty of women that demand a looker before they'll give him a chance, but that doesn't mean that most or all women should be assumed to be like that.

I think we can agree there are plenty of both genders that value personality as quite important.

ShyKBear's photo
Fri 01/25/08 01:08 PM


Now wait I didn't say that "most men" maybe I'm just too young to open my big mouth....Sorrysad



See I think men see this differently than women do. Me personally, I go for personality; it more important than looks, but then again attraction plays a roll. Doesn't mean they have to be prince charming.

For most men, it's all about looks and figure; it almost the first thing they look for...if you can't flaunt it...NEXT!

:wink: huh


Thanks for the broad generalization, men everywhere love being pigeonholed into a class of neanderthals who only care about a woman's measurements.




OK wait ... don't be sorrysadflowerforyou ... WE are asking opinions and everyone is entitled to one ,K ??:wink: ... I personally think you are incorrect BUT, it snot the first thing, and its the same for girls meeting a guy for the first time, BEFORE he has a chance to dazzle them with his wit, they "SEE" him first ... right ??



No not for me at least; I don't like to judge guys the first time I meet them based on looks, it's not fair to them! I don't go asking guys that I have to see a picture first before I can decide if we should meet, that cold hearted in my opinion, and I wish guys would do the same

AaronzDad's photo
Fri 01/25/08 01:10 PM

I think you're all being a little dishonest with yourselves. Dig a little deeper into your motivations and choices.

Looks OR personality? The question is flawed. The simple answer is BOTH.

On sites such as this the personality thing is sometimes easier to see than the looks but we seldom consider someone we view to be "ugly" as dating material. Sure we can be friends and perhaps later something might develop but that's rare.

We are initially attracted by looks. Just browse through the forums here and compare the number of times someone comments "You're really hot" or "You gorgeous hunk" or "You're so pretty" with the number of times anyone says something like "You are so brilliant" or "You have such a considerate personality" or "I really like your generosity".


In the weird world of online communication I've become friends with numerous people - some of them single ladies who may or may not be interested in me for a relationship. Some of them are unattractive to me physically so we're friends. They may have a great personality and I certainly wish them all the best but there's no romance developing there on my part. And before you call me cruel or shallow or some other simplistic label understand it's just reality.

Looks may attract but it takes compatible personality for real relationships to develop.


LadyOfMagic's photo
Fri 01/25/08 01:10 PM


The men that I've seen look for absolute 100% perfect 10s..They want EVERYTHING..you have to be beautiful,kind,have money or the abiliity to go out and get it/make it,have to be home to raise the kids and clean the house, AND still be able to attend to HIS needs..if you can't do that then..buhbye.


You couldn't have said that better; that's what I meant... flowerforyou

I am pretty sure I'm gonna spend the rest of my life alone..lol,because not only can I NOT do all that but if I could I wouldn't,whoever tries doing all that is gonna just keel over one day.noway

soxfan94's photo
Fri 01/25/08 01:11 PM

On sites such as this the personality thing is sometimes easier to see than the looks


I absolutely disagree with this part

LadyOfMagic's photo
Fri 01/25/08 01:15 PM
I agree..personality is easier to see..I mean just because some girl has posted a pic of herself being 5'8 125lbs and blonde dont make that true..she could be 4ft..300lbs..but all you got to go on is the pic.

KennethP5206's photo
Fri 01/25/08 01:18 PM
Well I will stop first on the picture, then I read the profile
Then if I don't like what I read I move on

Flirtyvirgo's photo
Fri 01/25/08 01:19 PM
def both, but more personalityflowerforyou

DebbieJT's photo
Fri 01/25/08 01:20 PM
the thing with dating sites or forums is you can be or pretend to be anything you want ..looks wise you can post a picture from 20 years ago , lie about your age etc...but eventually your true personalty will come threw on sites like these...and you show your true colours ...there a no rules to what attracts one person to another either in looks or personalty ..its an indivdual experience to us all.

KennethP5206's photo
Fri 01/25/08 01:21 PM

the thing with dating sites or forums is you can be or pretend to be anything you want ..looks wise you can post a picture from 20 years ago , lie about your age etc...but eventually your true personalty will come threw on sites like these...and you show your true colours ...there a no rules to what attracts one person to another either in looks or personalty ..its an indivdual experience to us all.
True

AaronzDad's photo
Fri 01/25/08 01:22 PM


On sites such as this the personality thing is sometimes easier to see than the looks


I absolutely disagree with this part


??? Of all the things I stated I'd think this would be least debated.

How so soxfan??