honestly, I'm not looking for a make out session, just a small kiss on the lips

the two most cliche'd and most well-known kisses:
1. The First Kiss
2. "You may kiss the bride"

1. She's never done this before... she's in her preteens, right after hitting puberty... she wonders what it's like and the curiosity is occupying her thoughts every day before she decides that she wants to try this thing called "kissing." she imagines almost every possible scenario of her first kiss, but she knows that she cannot imagine what it would really be like if she didn't actualy experience it. it's a land of unknown and she wants to jump right in, but she holds herself back, full of worries of what could go wrong... what others may think of her... how she might see herself afterward... but she knows how romantic and wonderful it looks in the movies, and she knows that she likes the feelings she gets when prince charming finally kisses the princess, and she wants that feeling to be more real for her... but she doesn't know what will really happen... then, she's sitting next to her crush or first boyfriend on the park bench, and all of these thoughts about kissing collected from days, weeks, months, or even years are running through her mind all at once... and as he turns to face her and looks into her eyes, she blushes... and then...

that's called sexual tension.

2. It's finally the day to be with Mr. Right for the rest of eternity, and she's standing there face to face with him in front of dozens or even hundreds of people. She knows that she should be feeling nervous about being in front of so many people, but she doesnt because nothing else in the world matters as she and the groom just gaze deeply into each other's eyes as they wait for that magical moment... the religion leader dude is reciting a blessing and talks on and on about the couple being together, but restrains them from actually locking lips til he says go. it is customary for the bride and groom to wait until the dude says "you may now kiss the bride" and both of them just cant wait to do it. they know that they belong together and they will feel complete once they kiss... but that completeness is restrained from them for the time being as they must go through the customary "I do's." They know it's coming, and their lips long for each other's. the dude says "you may now kiss the bride," and then...

that's also called sexual tension

getting the idea? starting to see a pattern?

here's another scenario:

she's on date with a guy she met a few nights ago at the local pub. she actually likes this guy because he made a great first impression by showing his fun side - she feels like they have a lot in common and that they have a lot to talk about (because he was building rapport and multiple threading his speech patterns hehe), so she actually shows up to the location early to make sure that she catches him. however, she doesn't want to seem desperate, so she takes a walk around the block and back in hopes that it will seem like she came on time or later. she's giving herself a little pressure to make a decent impression on this guy already. they meet outside a coffee shop, and greet each other with a hug. she notices that he smells good from the right amount and type of cologne, and it stimulates her senses. she is instantly relaxed, but she still wants to keep her head in the game here. he says that he needs to stop by his place (conveniently just across the street) for a second because he forgot something, so the two of them step inside for a moment. she immediately gets a stronger impression of him from seeing the inside of his home, and every thought possible enters her head: "why is he bringing me to his home already? what it be like to have sex on that couch? wow i shouldn't even be thinking that! hm he keeps his place fairly neat but i bet i could make a lot of improvements in the furniture arrangement etc... hey im already thinking in relationship mode here... wow what could happen between me and this guy? i just don't know..." he grabs his watch or whatever he forgot and takes her out. she thinks "so... we just came into his house and left and he didn't even try making a move on me while i was right there in the lion's den... am i even attractive to this guy? that wouldn't even make sense... i'm hot and i know it... did i wear the wrong dress? well i wouldn't have done anything sexual with him right then and there but this is making me wonder... what does he have planned for our date?" By the middle of the date her mind is full of unanswered questions as if he had sent her mixed signals the entire time (maybe he did that on purpose... hmmm...) and she isn't sure of how he feels for her but she's somewhat confident that he likes her... but she really... really... really wants to know for sure. he leans toward her to look at something interesting behind her while they are talking and she feels a rush of dopamine surging throughout her body. is this the kiss? but then he leans back and continues talking to her as if nothing happened... because nothing happened. he does this a second time, and this time she feels an even stronger rush than before because it had been taken away the first time. By the end of the night they are looking up at the stars and talking about what they thought of constellations when they were little kids. then he turns to face her, looking into her eyes, and tells her that he thinks it's really cool how she interprets her horoscope constellation. she blushes, and the emotional rush is stronger now than ever before as he leans in toward her. and then, finally...

that's sexual tension. you need to create this.

thanks

good luck man. im rootin for ya

ok, so tonight I gave kelly her christmas gift, we sat on the couch and cuddled. I was rubbing her face, I put my hand on her chin and went in for a kiss. I kissed her lips, but got nothing back. I asked her later why she won't kiss me, she told me she doesn't like kissing, I asked her why and she said she thinks it is awkward. I think she is pretty messed up, I like this girl, but maybe I should drop her. Who thinks kissing is awkward. Damn it, this is ****ty

so uhhh
wheres the sexual tension?
kiss = tension release
if u try to release tension when tension wasn't there, of course its gunna feel awkward...

I was touching her face earlier on, then I held her hand, she put my hand back to her face, she said she liked it when i touched her face, and she said she didn't know why.

this girl is tricky. She said that she started getting the awkward feeling 10 years ago, which means she either hasn't kissed a guy in 10 years, or has never kissed before.

She told me she wanted me to know that it has nothing to do with me, that I have done everything right in this relationship so far. She keeps saying she is a bad girlfriend, that she will never be a good one, that she is not normal. I told her she is perfect, it always makes her cry when i tell her she is good.

not bad of a start...baby steps are fine
soooo that might be why she let u kiss her
but ur gunna need a lot more tension than that

just keep building tension, don't release it, and have patience and see what happens...

i saw the movie transformers last night

the sexual tension between that wimpy kid and that hot hot hot brunette babe was through the friggin roof!

oh man and the blonde analyst with the accent... i want her so bad

I've got great respect for you! I wouldn't be able to hold out so long for anyone. For sex, sure, but kissing is great!

psh
thats prolly cuz ur doing all the nice guy things that she was raised to believe (through her mom, sappy chick flicks, and cosmo magazine) constitutes a good boyfriend or whatever...
in reality those nice guys aren't all that great...

she doesn't know what she wants. show her what she really wants by cranking up the volume on that sexual tension knob!

your bumming till you marry her,better start looking for a diamond if you want to get her to give you her virginity!

This is a completely weird relationship!!

what the (bleep) is that?

what?

That's strange that she doesn't like kissing. I have heard of that before...she just has a problem with intimacy. This is probably digging deeper into the problem than it needs to, but you mentioned that she cries when you tell her she's a good girlfriend...have you ever wondered if she has a history of sexual abuse? Maybe your girl is scared of that type of intimacy. I'm probably overanalyzing this, but i volunteered at a sexual abuse crisis center and this issue wasn't uncommon...some girls wouldn't be able to kiss someone because they couldn't bring themselves to have that intimacy with someone after being violated. also, they think it's their fault and feel they dont deserve to be with a good guy (which would explain her crying). The fact that she said she's disliked kissing for 10 years implies that something happened to her 10 years ago. Once again, I don't mean to judge her, it's just a theory. If this isn't the case and if you really like her, I wouldn't suggest dropping her because of this. It might just be one of those things you have to accept. Just like some people dont like cuddling... she just may not like kissing.

the thing that sucks is that I really like kissing and I really want to kiss her. I am not looking for a make out session, even just a peck on the lips would mean a lot to me.

If she doesn't like kissing do you think you are ever going to change that? If this girl is not meeting your needs (both emotional and physical) then why do you hang on? Don't you feel you DESERVE to have what YOU need in a relationship? If you think this will change (unlikely) then hang in there... but I have my doubts.

i don't know