I never really liked cute either. It goes back to grade school when a supposed friend told me not to be sad that I wasn't pretty or drop dead gorgeous. He said I was "cute" and that I should be happy because at least I know guys aren't with me for my looks, they are with me because of my personality.... Guess he was giving me a compliment, haha.

That's adorable rosie... Congratulations!

Is it like when they say "ain't you special" like they women do in the south? Or maybe it's Well aren't you cute?

I see youre from UK. The ladies in US use the word cute loosely like butter. You are either the toast they are buttering up or the chicken she is frying in the butter. LOL

Good Times, keep smiling.

thank you river

I agree with you about "cuteness" as a personality trait.

sorry Rock, I also don't see being cute as a personality trait. Personality traits go deeper than cuteness.

I do know well, what this is really about.

It's not a matter of a particular word or phrase, it's any time a guy gets up the whatever-it-takes to try to initiate a more personal relationship with a woman, and she uses a deflection of some kind to fend him off, while saying something that is "nice" on the surface.
What's upsetting isn't really the word itself, it's the totality of being told "no" in a way that is insincerely flattering.

I don't know at all what it's like to be female in America, but to be male in America is almost all about appearing strong, decisive, and confident. To fellow males as well as to females.

The "let him down gently" technique, while seemingly logical and caring on the surface, is actually demeaning, because it's being used on men. It essentially combines the "no," with a declaration of "I don't think you're tough enough to take the truth, so I'll cushion the blow with obviously meaningless flattery." This may be connected to how many of us learn that when someone says "but you are cute," that it's a sort of consolation prize. And consolation prizes only serve to console the people handing them out.

And despite how well I know from long observation, that many males can be VERY bad "sports" about rejection, and how unpleasant they can be to deal with, I'm not sure that the "let them down easy" technique is the best way around that.

It can be worse, when the "catch phrase" for saying "no" gets to be sort of "socially recommended," as this particular one seems to be. It can feel as though you're being rejected by an entire group, and not just by one woman, entirely by accident (or maybe side-effect).

So in my case at least, it's not the word "cute" that's the problem, it's the totality of covering rejection with insincere or meaningless flattery.

I don't hate it but I certainly don't get all excited when I hear it and in my case being a man it's usually the younger they are the more likely (I'll be 63 in six weeks).
I get called handsome much more often which of course is a matter of opinion and I can tell quickly if they're sincere.
Some may think I'm handsome but I'm sure there are plenty saying "eww ick".
Having said this made me realize I've gotten into the habit of judging their sincerity by these words and how they're used.
At any rate, to me at least it's not a big thing...

never call a guy cute do hate it went someone calls me sweetie,honey, love.etc. it is really annoying when you don't know or just meet this goes for both mail or female don't call any stupid pet names it is carol or carolann period

Sure. Lot's of things.

I may give them my views on why it "gets my goat," I stop dating/talking to them, or figure out if it's really a non/my issue.

Other than that context is important.

I never let someone down easy always just walk away when some thing is over its over don't understand why people hold on to something that not working maybe I am just a little cold not cold just live in reality like myself to much to hold on to some not working

After getting like 825 mails, containing this word, I started disliking it. And all them mails bypassed my mail preferences

I don't mind being called handsome cute or sweet, at least I know then that the person ain't lying..

Haha that's what I thought.

But it's not ones that I'm attracted to that do the cuty sweety thing
just people i get to know in general life, friends wifes ,
Obviously I am not quite the same with someone I am attracted to.
I'm only a man as it were for the right sort of woman.
I don't want to spend time trying to conform to a random set of conceptions of what a man should or shouldn't be. according to every woman I see.

Should a sabre tooth turn up however.....

Since I've joined I've had 6 digit numbers of messages with men calling me beautiful, sexy, gorgeous, pretty, breath taking, etc...

Imagine a man's reaction, who is serious, if I were to snub him based on what a bunch of idiots have done to try and get my attention?

Nope... I will never grow tired of being called any of those by a man... One of them might actually mean it and I wouldn't want to miss that boat.

That's too bad you feel that way Larsi... You really are a handsome man and I'm sure there are good women out there that mean it when they say it.

Any way thanks for the input guys :)
So if on the rare occasion i meet a woman I am attracted to and she starts calling me stevie.

then ill leave it there...

And shave my arse :)

Why? Some women like a hairy arse!

More to the point... You haven't said what you prefer to be called or what endearing words you'd rather hear than sweet or cute?

I definitely don't like being called cute, beautiful, gorgeous etc.

Once got a message that said "hello mum". What the fluff??? Total turn off for sure

Valid point m8

Yeah. But people who never checked my profile properly? Who never traded messages with me? Not even saying, people who never seen me in person? If they did, they would change their mind anyway

Maybe, that chap noticed, how helpful and patient you are in the Help forum?