Topic: I don't know what to do
1onlyaname's photo
Mon 09/07/15 06:01 AM


He said he like me so much but he only see me as a friend. He doesn't show any interest or talk about relationship and having a commitment. He wants to meet me when his coming in philippines for a vacation. My problem is he knows that i have feelings for him. I had no idea if he really wants to be with me or he just love the idea of having someone for a vacation, since he already know how i feel for him.


That screams like he is NOT INTERESTED because he gives her absolutely NO HOPE of his interest. He is using her for a place to crash for his vacation.

you are hilarious with your assumptions. that's not quite how vacations in the Philippines work.


As much as i am aware how "interested" and "integrated" you are with our culture and way of life, and as much as i have seen you defend a few on here, which is appreciated....you have many comments and posts that are also very presumptive , generalized and frankly, misrepresentative. Not all, mind you, but it is there. Your point of view as a frequent expat is valued, but kindly refrain yourself from being the spokesperson of every citizen(especially women) of the philippines. Thank you.

I have refrained myself I haven't mentioned the sex industry which may be what you are afraid to face if I reveal more. there's two cultures in the Philippines I can express my opinions on either of them. hiding it doesn't help.


No. I am not trying to hide the various forms of human trafficking and sexual exploitation that happens here. I dont need to whitewash something that happens in all 3rd world countries. And i dont know why you think that was what i was referring to.

I rest my case. Presumptive, generalized and misrepresented.

the Philippines is not a third world country. human trafficking??? that's between you and china. that's a whole another story. don't make LA cafe into a international human trafficking racket.

no photo
Mon 09/07/15 06:12 AM
Whatever...you live shuttling yourself between two countries...so what do i know, right? slaphead

You have given out your point of view as to the OP's dillema. So has everyone else. And everyone commented on everyone else's opinion.

It's all good.drinker

miles143's photo
Mon 09/07/15 06:25 AM

Oh dear,
Yeah, after long time talking trust and love was growing in your heart. And he was enjoying it, playing with it, playing with your feelings. He is looking for bed and breakfast in the Philippines? Hey!

I thank God for opening your eyes to see the truth. You may cry for a while, but not for too long please. You are such a nice lady. Don't run after men. Men have to run after YOU! Especially the right one! That's the way it happened to me, now, at age of 59. I got married last year, by Mingle2. You gonna feel so unbelievable when the right man is running for your love!
My advice: Don't compromise! God's Word says, you shall not lack of anything, you shall have the fullness of life. Amen

Amen for this. Thank you. This means a lot. I hope i can get rid of him soon as possible.

miles143's photo
Mon 09/07/15 06:30 AM

Run! Don't waste your time on a man who has made it clear he is not into you. He will only end up using you.

why should she run??? why shouldn't she meet him? you can't meet someone before a commitment??

im dying to meet him but i hold myself not to. Coz the other side if my mind keep saying "Good for him, bad for me".frustrated

1onlyaname's photo
Mon 09/07/15 06:31 AM
Whatever...you live shuttling yourself between two countries...so what do i know, right? slaphead

You have given out your point of view as to the OP's dillema. So has everyone else. And everyone commented on everyone else's opinion.

It's all good.drinker

its all good but shame on you calling ur country a third world county its no longer a third world country. take pride in it its an incredible place to live.

TMommy's photo
Mon 09/07/15 06:34 AM
if your mind is already telling ya what ya need to do girl then do it
if you are not getting the response from him, if he is not saying he has feelings for you then you already know where he stands on this

he has been chatting you up for a crash pad on his vacation
you are cheaper than a hotel
and he is hoping for someone to show him around
have some fun with
and sleep with while he is at your place


now be honest with yourself
think that over
and tell him how you feel


but do NOT try to make it into some kind of fairy tale in your mind

no photo
Mon 09/07/15 06:35 AM

Whatever...you live shuttling yourself between two countries...so what do i know, right? slaphead

You have given out your point of view as to the OP's dillema. So has everyone else. And everyone commented on everyone else's opinion.

It's all good.drinker

its all good but shame on you calling ur country a third world county its no longer a third world country. take pride in it its an incredible place to live.


Ok...we are actually a first world country. We like downplaying it a lot. Its part of our self-effacing nature. I take pride in that. Thanks for blowing our cover.

miles143's photo
Mon 09/07/15 06:37 AM

That is true. you can find friends for the night all around the globe, agree.
No need to force either, just open the wallet.

but if he is flaky, and she looks forward to him
if he thinks vacation fun, and she thinks relationship...

There must be something wayyyy off here.

But, to be honest, to make an informed assessment (ugh... i like that word)
we need to hear the man as well.

if you commit online to marriage and go and have sex misleading the woman. daddy can put u on a black list and you will have to explain yourself next time. doesn't happen often but it does happen. then forget the wallet open the bank account.

No money involve. Its purely emotion. And it makes me hate myself. His sweet words is getting on my nerve. Its my fault:cry:

easyandsimple's photo
Mon 09/07/15 06:39 AM
First and foremost, if you have never meet him in person and only on the Internet. The first thing I'd say is faced reality. The Internet is not really real people can be a fantasy here. Face reality, you don't have to tell the truth and no one would know. You can't see personal expressions I could tell you I was God. Until you meet a person for real it just a story. Any story they want to tell you.

1onlyaname's photo
Mon 09/07/15 06:55 AM
First and foremost, if you have never meet him in person and only on the Internet. The first thing I'd say is faced reality. The Internet is not really real people can be a fantasy here. Face reality, you don't have to tell the truth and no one would know. You can't see personal expressions I could tell you I was God. Until you meet a person for real it just a story. Any story they want to tell you.

exactly and if he is coming there least have lunch with him.

no photo
Mon 09/07/15 07:05 AM
First and foremost, if you have never meet him in person and only on the Internet. The first thing I'd say is faced reality. The Internet is not really real people can be a fantasy here. Face reality, you don't have to tell the truth and no one would know. You can't see personal expressions I could tell you I was God. Until you meet a person for real it just a story. Any story they want to tell you. :thumbsup:



All you people are in my phone


rofl

miles143's photo
Mon 09/07/15 07:05 AM
Im in my middle of emotion and some of your comments are so amusing. But really, thank you so much to all of you. I mean it. Most of the comments are very helpful. Sometimes love is so unfair.

no photo
Mon 09/07/15 07:07 AM


Whatever...you live shuttling yourself between two countries...so what do i know, right? slaphead

You have given out your point of view as to the OP's dillema. So has everyone else. And everyone commented on everyone else's opinion.

It's all good.drinker

its all good but shame on you calling ur country a third world county its no longer a third world country. take pride in it its an incredible place to live.


Ok...we are actually a first world country. We like downplaying it a lot. Its part of our self-effacing nature. I take pride in that. Thanks for blowing our cover.



Don't caste your pearls before swine..


:banana:

no photo
Mon 09/07/15 07:10 AM
Edited by SassyEuro2 on Mon 09/07/15 07:06 AM

Im in my middle of emotion and some of your comments are so amusing. But really, thank you so much to all of you. I mean it. Most of the comments are very helpful. Sometimes love is so unfair.



IMO this is not, nor was it ever love.
You deserve a REAL man in real life.
Cut your losses, consider yourself lucky & move on
flowers



no photo
Mon 09/07/15 07:11 AM
Edited by Pansytilly on Mon 09/07/15 07:13 AM

Im in my middle of emotion and some of your comments are so amusing. But really, thank you so much to all of you. I mean it. Most of the comments are very helpful. Sometimes love is so unfair.


Atta girl. Ngumiti ka na lang. Mabuti nang masaktan ngayon, kaysa magsisi sa huli. Darating din ang para sa yo, na mamahalin ka nang naaayon sa tama at mabuti.

Masyado mo lang siguro hinayaang mahibang ka sa ideya na binigay nya sa yo.

Glad we were of service flowerforyou

kc0003's photo
Mon 09/07/15 07:35 AM
well, i know this is the internet, but has anyone considered the possibility that he, like her, is interested in developing an actual relationship?

he may be sitting back thinking this could be real, but he wants to meet with her, spend some time with her, see if she is really the person he has been talking to for all this time.

i seem to be in the minority here, but i could never commit to anyone that i have never met. so maybe, just maybe, he is on the level and simply needs something a bit more tangible than emails, im's, phone calls or skype conversations.

no photo
Mon 09/07/15 07:40 AM

well, i know this is the internet, but has anyone considered the possibility that he, like her, is interested in developing an actual relationship?

he may be sitting back thinking this could be real, but he wants to meet with her, spend some time with her, see if she is really the person he has been talking to for all this time.

i seem to be in the minority here, but i could never commit to anyone that i have never met. so maybe, just maybe, he is on the level and simply needs something a bit more tangible than emails, im's, phone calls or skype conversations.


Then he would have made that clear. Why beat around the bush?

no photo
Mon 09/07/15 07:41 AM
I need to make a declaration:

Ako ay isang mag-atas puting diyosa smokin

kc0003's photo
Mon 09/07/15 07:48 AM


well, i know this is the internet, but has anyone considered the possibility that he, like her, is interested in developing an actual relationship?

he may be sitting back thinking this could be real, but he wants to meet with her, spend some time with her, see if she is really the person he has been talking to for all this time.

i seem to be in the minority here, but i could never commit to anyone that i have never met. so maybe, just maybe, he is on the level and simply needs something a bit more tangible than emails, im's, phone calls or skype conversations.


Then he would have made that clear. Why beat around the bush?


i don't presume to know other people's motives. i'm just offering a possible scenario.

my suggestion could be completely wrong, the op needs to find this out...as best she can. she is responsible for how she allows others to treat her, not me and certainly not the guy in question. he only does what she lets him.

1onlyaname's photo
Mon 09/07/15 07:57 AM
well, i know this is the internet, but has anyone considered the possibility that he, like her, is interested in developing an actual relationship?

he may be sitting back thinking this could be real, but he wants to meet with her, spend some time with her, see if she is really the person he has been talking to for all this time.

i seem to be in the minority here, but i could never commit to anyone that i have never met. so maybe, just maybe, he is on the level and simply needs something a bit more tangible than emails, im's, phone calls or skype conversations.

you not alone I totally agree it seems people are quick to give cut n run advice. this I love him want to marry him but no I haven't sat down to have coffee with him yet. makes no sense