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| Topic: If You're Looking for a Woman Guys... | |
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Edited by
Estelle79
on
Thu 03/12/15 02:40 AM
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I want to know what's in it for you women to defend sexism against women. Or defend feminism as if it meant doing it alone, being both man and woman and in 2 places at once. What do you women derive from this stance? I am just curious since you seem to want to share your views. I do speak for myself as a woman, it is obvious I can only speak that much. I only have one voice, don't worry.. See.... there you go again! You women, and you women! As if you aren't a woman! And as you said, you have only one voice, so, you are you, so you don't speak for me! As for whether I am for or against sexism, feminism or whatever, I reserve my comments as it is only MY own thoughts, and don't represent others. Cavemen ........Hmmmm, I rather like the idea of when men went hunting and women tended the house,  cave, have children, and did what women were supposed to do!  I can't and I don't speak for all women, I only have one voice, it's not a threat to you and your opinions. You are just as strong minded and have your own. I wasn't saying anything against the cavemen, if you read back that wasn't my point. I was saying that it may have been to their benefit to support women, so that women could be women and men could be men respectfully. I am not convinced that cavemen wanted to control women and I was pointing out it could have been that sexism against women was created later on and was a mistake since women are not a threat to men and don't need to be controlled. Wouldn't the answer be for men to become feminists? You are not a threat, Estelle! I am strong minded too.... but I won't and don't bulldoze my way and force my way of looking at things! And I don't speak for the other women. Everyone has their own ways and the cultural differences also play a part. I sometimes wish, and I mean, I as in me....I wish men would be more like the cavemen of days gone where they would bring back the bread and meat, and we, women would be doing what we women were biologically meant to.... bear children, nurse the children, tend to them..... and let the men be the providers/breadwinner, the protectors, the head of the family! The idea of feminism has sometimes being more negative then positive, in that,some might view it as equality in every sense! I think we agree that women want equality and at the same time we want to be women. This can be a paradox. Men say things like you can't have it both ways, but they don't know that we don't get to fulfill our potential as women either way. Only when we have both ways can we be women. |
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I want to know what's in it for you women to defend sexism against women. Or defend feminism as if it meant doing it alone, being both man and woman and in 2 places at once. What do you women derive from this stance? I am just curious since you seem to want to share your views. I do speak for myself as a woman, it is obvious I can only speak that much. I only have one voice, don't worry.. See.... there you go again! You women, and you women! As if you aren't a woman! And as you said, you have only one voice, so, you are you, so you don't speak for me! As for whether I am for or against sexism, feminism or whatever, I reserve my comments as it is only MY own thoughts, and don't represent others. Cavemen ........Hmmmm, I rather like the idea of when men went hunting and women tended the house, cave, have children, and did what women were supposed to do! I can't and I don't speak for all women, I only have one voice, it's not a threat to you and your opinions. You are just as strong minded and have your own. I wasn't saying anything against the cavemen, if you read back that wasn't my point. I was saying that it may have been to their benefit to support women, so that women could be women and men could be men respectfully. I am not convinced that cavemen wanted to control women and I was pointing out it could have been that sexism against women was created later on and was a mistake since women are not a threat to men and don't need to be controlled. Wouldn't the answer be for men to become feminists? You are not a threat, Estelle! I am strong minded too.... but I won't and don't bulldoze my way and force my way of looking at things! And I don't speak for the other women. Everyone has their own ways and the cultural differences also play a part. I sometimes wish, and I mean, I as in me....I wish men would be more like the cavemen of days gone where they would bring back the bread and meat, and we, women would be doing what we women were biologically meant to.... bear children, nurse the children, tend to them..... and let the men be the providers/breadwinner, the protectors, the head of the family! The idea of feminism has sometimes being more negative then positive, in that,some might view it as equality in every sense! I think we agree that women want equality and at the same time we want to be women. I just want to be a woman! 
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Me too!
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Oh estelle .. You should add that line to your profile .. ... Looking for a feminist man ... Best of luck .. Lmao I like my man manly .. Grrrrr  I don't think you understand what I meant but again I will explain it and say a man who believes in being equal in our differences in lieu of using the word feminist. Do you agree that a man can be protective and provide and be and manly without being abusive and controlling? I feel sorry for you that you feel sorry for me... |
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Here is the thing Estelle. Every post you make is one sided towards YOU being abused, hurt.....or whatever it was that happened to you. Blondey saying that she feels sorry that you went through that.....well, I would take that as a sentiment that is natural as no person wants to see harm come to another. Based on your experiences (whether you made them up or they happened to you) you generate topics from how men can't love, to how men are abusive, to now you want a feminist man. So here is an idea. Why don't you take time and figure out just what it is you want. Or, if you are writing topics here to either serve a purpose for some term paper or just to create stimulating convo, then please continue.
The above may be how I feel.....or it may be bs. But hey.....let's keep this thing rolling. 
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Estelle to run in the next USA presidential election
Vote Estelle 
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Edited by
SparklingCrystal 💖💎
on
Thu 03/12/15 04:46 AM
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Of course I can be wrong, please show me if I am. My argument is that perhaps cavemen may not have been sexist as it didn't serve any useful purpose then and it doesn't now, women are not a threat to men. Maybe cavemen were very nice to women and helped out with the cave chores. What you are talking about is a matriarchal culture. Nothing much to do with feminism. Like you stated, that came to being in a time when women were oppressed, to fight for equality. So you're right, what you mean is a matriarchal culture. The one we're still in (it's rapidly changing, thank god!!!) is a patriarchal culture. Google it if this subject interest you, you are on to something now, girl!! Kudos! In the ancient times you are talking about, men did the typical things that go with masculine energy: action, protect against bigger threats (they have the physique for that, we don't), focus their attention & energy (so they can hunt). Work solo but up to a point also team up (hunting). All this also means competition, wanting to be the best, strongest etc. etc. But not the arrogant ego chit you can see in our culture. Just the real masculine thing. More to do with keeping them fit, on their toes, so they were strong enough to fight off big threats and fit enough to hunt, for days if necessary. So this competition thing had a purpose. It's part of the masculine. It's also why still men like competing in sports for instance. We women often don't get that, we don't have that in us, UNLESS we have become too influenced by the patriarchal culture we were born and raised in. Unfortunately a lot of women are affected by this. We also have to succeed in careers, school etc in order to be respected by the masculine oriented society. And unfortunately we compete with each other, which is so not the original divine feminine! THe real divine feminine works together. While men were away hunting, women had to hold the fort. They needed to help and support each other in order to survive. Think one giving birth. Other women had to help her during labour, yet other women looked after her home and her other children, so they were safe. They looked after each other's children, while groups were out to gather small game and fruits and edible greens. Women needed each other to keep the community and their families thriving. Women also are 'equipped' to multitask based on these times. Think doing washing in a river, at the same time keeping an eye on children and keeping an eye on the environment for wild animals or other enemies. We had to multi-task to keep everything going and everyone safe. This is also why we can walk away from cooking a meal to do something else (like save a child from a dangerous situation) and turn back to cooking as if we hadn't been interrupted --> another form of multi-tasking. So whereas men have the ability to focus to hunt down a prey, we do not generally have that ability, but we can multi-task. If you put all this together, you get a smooth, well-oiled machine. Man and woman complementing each other perfectly. And this is how it's supposed to be. And no, in those days there was indeed no feminism, there was no need. If women had been less than men, the community would have collapsed upon itself. Men and women were equally needed and important in order for the species to thrive and survive. But seriously, Google it, matriarchal cultures and patriarchal culture. We are currently moving from patriarchal to matriarchal. We are in the transition, hence all the chaos, hence the necessity for feminism etc etc. Transitions take time! |
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Edited by
Estelle79
on
Thu 03/12/15 06:37 AM
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Like Amelinng said 'I just want to be a woman', I think that explains everything. In the patriarchal culture, women can't be women, that's the problem. I don't know if that makes me a feminist, a matriarch or maybe it just makes me a woman. It makes me mad lol.
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Like Amelinng said 'I just want to be a woman', I think that explains everything. In the patriarchal culture, women can't be women, that's the problem. I don't know if that makes me a feminist, a matriarch or maybe it just makes me a woman. It makes me mad lol. "Mad 'Wo'Man" 
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Like Amelinng said 'I just want to be a woman', I think that explains everything. In the patriarchal culture, women can't be women, that's the problem. I don't know if that makes me a feminist, a matriarch or maybe it just makes me a woman. It makes me mad lol. "Mad 'Wo'Man" Mad kaustuv ! |
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Like Amelinng said 'I just want to be a woman', I think that explains everything. In the patriarchal culture, women can't be women, that's the problem. I don't know if that makes me a feminist, a matriarch or maybe it just makes me a woman. It makes me mad lol. "Mad 'Wo'Man" Mad kaustuv ! 'Sweet' Elle! 
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Like Amelinng said 'I just want to be a woman', I think that explains everything. In the patriarchal culture, women can't be women, that's the problem. I don't know if that makes me a feminist, a matriarch or maybe it just makes me a woman. It makes me mad lol. "Mad 'Wo'Man" Mad kaustuv ! 'Sweet' Elle! thank u gentleman !
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 [You Are Welcome, 'Lady']! |
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Like Amelinng said 'I just want to be a woman', I think that explains everything. In the patriarchal culture, women can't be women, that's the problem. I don't know if that makes me a feminist, a matriarch or maybe it just makes me a woman. It makes me mad lol. Don't let it make you mad! Nor slip into gender-bashing and thinking all men are bad. They're not! Yes, there are a-holes, just like there are female a-holes that hurt men just the same. But there are true gems out there as well. Getting mad won't get you anywhere, just be a woman, be feminine. The feminine doesn't really get mad nor digs her heels in the sand. The feminine is about understanding, insight and accepting that things are the way they are. Doesn't mean you go out with a-holes, nor that you cannot help things to change. It does mean you get to be woman, feminine. That way you will attract men who will appreciate you for being a woman. It's an enormous individual process to get there, it may sound easy, it isn't. Most people don't even know what the real feminine or masculine is about anymore. And at the same time societies all over the world are going through the same process. We are all part of that. And each and every woman *and man* that is already feeling & thinking differently, and genuinely wants things to change, will help this process along. But anger is not the way to go. Won't help you, nor the process. If nothing else, it will work against you. Change for the better is achieved by love, being gentle, soft. That's what being a woman is about. Live it, be it, then you will help both yourself and the world. And helping the world is very important, cos if the world doesn't change, there will be no room for the individual to be feminine either, nor for the real masculine for that matter. Maybe it's part of your life's path to work with this. But please remember anger is not the way. Anger just invokes anger, it will not entice people to open up and learn/change/understand what you are trying to convey!! And bear in mind that you're probably not in the most easy country in the world when dealing with issues like this. Although Turkey was the first country in Europe (or the world??) with certain rights for women (can't remember which ones). I've also learnt America is not nr 1 when it comes to this, which is where you're roots are. I don't think I could deal with living there. My daughter is struggling with it as well, as she isn't used to "women are inferior" thinking. Things are a lot better over here. I don't think I've ever come across serious 'women are inferior' thinking in my entire life, in my country that is. We haven't gotten rid of it entirely yet, but have come a long long way. Meaning it is possible, it is happening and things are changing!
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Like Amelinng said 'I just want to be a woman', I think that explains everything. In the patriarchal culture, women can't be women, that's the problem. I don't know if that makes me a feminist, a matriarch or maybe it just makes me a woman. It makes me mad lol. I come from a place where gender equality is very high, one of the highest in the world. But let me tell you, in my opinion, as a woman, if you understand a person regardless of his/her gender, i don't think its right to point out sexism if there is something wrong. You also cannot be too proud of being a woman. It may intimidate a man. Also, before you complain of sexism, think of what, and how you also treat a man or what the situation could be. Maybe it is just the individual. Sometimes, in the midst of emotion, we can never think of that because emotion is misleading. BTW, i like being a woman and i like to make my man feel that he is a man. a GREAT man. |
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Edited by
Estelle79
on
Thu 03/12/15 09:33 AM
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If it were as simple as treating a man right, then I should be in the happiest relationship ever..it depends on the man, lot's of men in the US want the woman to provide, buy him a car while he sits at home 'looking after the kids', but not really, they use women, I've seen this..
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Edited by
dreamerana
on
Thu 03/12/15 12:12 PM
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If it were as simple as treating a man right, then I should be in the happiest relationship ever..it depends on the man ^^^^ this right here is what it's about. the desire to be in a happy relationship. it's not about the isms, the equality or even the cavemen. MOST men and MOST women want a happy relationship that meets each other's needs. |
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If it were as simple as treating a man right, then I should be in the happiest relationship ever..it depends on the man, lot's of men in the US want the woman to provide, buy him a car while he sits at home 'looking after the kids', but not really, they use women, I've seen this.. Estelle, lots of men in the USA are the opposite of the men that you keep describing. |
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If it were as simple as treating a man right, then I should be in the happiest relationship ever..it depends on the man, lot's of men in the US want the woman to provide, buy him a car while he sits at home 'looking after the kids', but not really, they use women, I've seen this.. Estelle, lots of men in the USA are the opposite of the men that you keep describing. I agree with Dave. furthermore, in the US you have the choice of the partner you enter a relationship with. if you don't want a man who doesn't work then don't date him. don't have children with him |
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Back to my original topic...
Wouldn't it benefit cavemen to support women? I guess American men even got that part wrong, as the man says: 'yay for women's rights, I am a feminist, now you can go to work and bring home the paycheck and I can stay home and wait for you to get back and cook me dinner clean up all my messes and massage my feet'..that is how American men support women's equality.
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