THE LUST IS GONE. THE FIRES ARE OUT. WHAT HAPPENED AND HOW IT HAPPENED?

DID YOU EVER CONSIDER THAT HOW VITAL AND IMPORTANT THIS FOR THE RELATIONSHIP? IS THERE ANYTHING YOU CAN DO TO REKINDLE LOVE'S PASSION TO SPARK BACK? IT IS VERY SIGNIFICANT FOR A HAPPY, HEALTHY AND LASTING RELATIONSHIPS.

PLEASE PUT SOME THOUGHTS ON IT.

when that happened in my marriage my mother in law said go back to what drew us together in the first place and for some reason that really helped

In my marriage, everything else was more important than the wife and kids to the ex...total opposite from how I was raised. So after 20 yrs. of feeling like I was in a one-sided relationship and raising my 4 children on my own, (he was in the home but NOT an involved parent)...I told him I wanted out. During those 20 yrs., and after having children, when our first child was a year old, was the one and ONLY time we got away together as a couple. We never went or did anything together after that.

With children involved in the relationship, I think couples have to make time for each other and keep that 'connection', that 'lust' fresh and alive if the relationship is going to thrive. Otherwise the relationship gets stale.

The hardest part is keeping that desire going on Both sides of the relationship.
Life can get in the way very easily and is possibly one of the hardest things on a relationship.

I agree shutterbug. I think that relationships are hard to keep on track, even before having children. Once children are born, wonderful beings that they are, the relationships become harder. Especially trying to keep the lust, the focus now switches to the children not each other. Looking back on my mistakes, I think that it is important to keep that lust alive and build on that even after having children, I mean the reason you had children was because of that lust. Couples need to take time out even if its only once in a blue moon to spend times as "a" and "b", instead of the whole kit and ka-boodle.

Just my opinion from what I experienced

It seems that women lose intrest before men do, so it take more work for men to to keep the intrest then it would be the other way around. The one thing I have ran into. Is most women expect the men to give but don't give in return. mind you i'm saying most and I heard this and seen it all to many times. So ladys if your one that expects to get alot of the time. I would suggest to learn how to give. It works both ways

Now looking at it this why. Not alot of men know how to pleas a women and the funny thing is, it don't have to be sex. so men think about that one before you think your quicky is enough

If there's a strong attraction, I don't think it just "goes away."...Like POOF! I think other influences have an impact on why attraction and lust may fade. If there have been hurtful episodes that undermine trust, any kind of abuse, dishonesty and general lack of integrity or respect between people,those things tend to put a damper on attraction. It's an internal transformation that comes about as a result of things like above. What is taking place on the outside is a reflection of what is taking place on the inside.

Awwww Baby Boy ya said a mouth full and so true.

It takes two to fall in Love, it takes both to keep that love, it takes both to communcate, no relationship will last unless both give there 100% all the time.

To give is to receive. Just the little things and jesters in life will enhance a relationship 10 fo.

One must always remember what made you fall in love. Learn to play and laugh an joke around be a kid together again. As to speak let your hair down.

Never forget your actions when in a relaionship speaks for two now. Treat them as you expect to be treated.

As long as you treat each with RESPECT, BE HONEST AND CAN TRUST THEM COMPLETLEY. Laugh together , cuddle alot , always listen to them with your full attention humm the sex drive will stay in the relationship as well unless it is medical.

I think stress,work, children,bills all play a significant factor.You get bogged down in trying to achieve so much that when there is any free time to enjoy with each other youre just too worn out.After a while depending on work schedules you tend to drift apart,coupled with the fact that you may have a friend or relation that does help the situation either.there is alot going on that tends to stretch ones ability until there is a breaking point and eventually time together is thought about less than individual time.communication plays a major role in the loss of a lot of relationship it becomes more of what you think rather than what you know because the time really isnt there because of everything that demands your time.

Horndogs don’t die out…so find yourself a woman that is like you, I mean one haha

Seriously, understanding the changes in ones relationship why this is a problem is a start. If a couple needs to re-ignite that fire that brought them together at the beginning, they need to make time for this in their relationship and find ideas that will help them alongside their current changes, either its a physical thing, mental or just having the energy. Lol

Relationship is not just getting along as a couple. I believe most relationships failed today because of some sexual issues.(this is why you find many that cheat. Now internet is making this easy for them) So sex or love making is as important as paying the bills. Both need to make the effort if they want to prolong their relationship.

Any situation can be helped even if it’s a medical issue. Open your mind to ideas or to people in similar situation and see what they did to help them. I am not saying this is the answer but somewhere here you might find something for you and your partner so google it, talk about, try it and keep looking for what works for you both.

Don’t let your every day problems as an excuse to stop you both from giving this a chance otherwise it will be another problem on the top of another……that will pull you both apart more.

I always think, an effort is a chance of anything happening…*smiles

make time for each other
got children?
schedule a date night, find a sitter go to a hotel and rekindle the passion you once had for each other

finances low
still get the sitter
go for a walk and talk
find that intimate connection that caused you to fall in love in the first place

if you love the person fight for your relationship
don't let it wither and die

Well at 23 I have a very high sex drive... higher than normal actually but besides the point, maybe in long term relationships one or both parties become bored with the sex? Also your sex drive changes with age... I must admit i did not start to really enjoy sex until early this year and now i can't get enough. In the "black community" not that this is about race but just throwing it out there... When the man loses interest in his woman 9 out of 10 times his is cheating and prefers having sex with the other woman... now this can go both ways. In any case, some women lose their sex drive after having babies or even with age.... from what i have heard from older women i work with. My mother has 6 children and always made time for sex... so the kids are not an issue for every couple, only an excuse!

from what i have heard and experienced
women in their 40ies are at their prime
and have high sex drives!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sometimes there is just too much water under the bridge.....or the straw that broke the camel's back..........

i have no idea what you're talking about lol

Love, respect, trust and honesty is all that is necessary for two peole in love to be happy. Sex is a hobby that feels good. Try making love to her instead, she may go for that...

^5 Joyce! I can relate to that.

You don't fall in love by choice it's by chance
And you don't fall out of love by chance,it's by choice.

If you had a good sex life and things are starting to go down hill it could be that other problems are developing in the relationship and you are not consciously aware of them. I really believe the sexual relationship is a barometer for how the relationship is going.

Try to figure what the problems are outside of the bedroom and see if things improve in the bedroom.