K, I have known this guy for almost five years. We dated before but never had sex. He was so in love with me, always telling me how strongly he felt and viewed me as the one that got away. He was in a bad place and I ended things. He had always contacted me, here and there. I never responded until now and we got together as friends. Now he is right back to telling me how much he wants to bee with me. We have great fun together and have so so much in common. BUT, I am not that physically attracted to him. I have always been in relationships where you just wanted to jump each other's bones all the time. Will that attraction develop, am I being stupid and holding out for the non existence fairy tale. Ugh, what should I do?

Hmmm.. hoping attraction will grow..
kind of like mold..lol.. you either got it or you don't... just my opinion..

Ya, tricky.
It can..spontaneously happen.
Usually takes some kind of trigger though,
not sure what yours might be.

When guys start telling me that i'm the one that got away....that's exactly what I do.

It's taken you 5 years to figure out it doesn't work. Don't take another 5 years and realize you made a big mistake.

Go find someone you work with.

You could replace him with a male Melmacian. There is one who frequents this site.

You said "But...I am not that physically attracted to him". Nuff said.

physical love is LUST---be-careful with guys --they they store there emotions in different compartments in the brain ( in the left side )---a woman on the other-hand will feel there emotions all over ( left and right side ) ---a man can and will profess his love for her when he only loves the sex and not you as person---lust only will not keep a man---he needs to be connected emotionally----this is most cases some exceptions where a woman is left brain dominant like most men----GO FOR THE GUY THAT LOVES YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE--- ''attraction is not a choice'' ( not a conscious one } its a emotional choice---so to make health choices we need what is called self-awareness---work on trying to figure out why you are so confused not the other person and things will fall into place---

Try to kiss him nothing more. If you feel no spark after all this time I doubt there ever will be. I only suggested a kiss because SOMETIMES our minds are so set a kiss can break the friend zone or it can tell you friends is all it can be.

Depends on what you're intentions are, what you're looking for my dear. Are you looking for great sex or looking for great love "great relationship"? Why does love depend on sex? What does sex have anything to do specifically with love in this context?



This kind of action(s) will ruin any and all relationships fairly quickly. If as you state "jump each other's bone all the time" it looses it's passion, it's fire, it's deep desire/interest. It just becomes a usual thing, activity.

For example, flowers, chocolates, and things of that nature are sweet and special on special occasions "anniversary, birthday's maybe, valentines day and so forth" But would they remain as sentimental or special if they were given every day?

You've known him for five years, he's in love with you...You ended it cause he was in a bad place...When he contacted you, there was a reason you agreed to see him again ...Might be time to test the waters..

Cowboy you say some of the smartest and sweetest things..... but you kinda scare me with your lack of interest in sex. Please don't be offended but I just don't get it.

MaJayJay29, did it ever occur to you that CowboyGH may have the God-given ability to refrain from sexual intercourse until after marriage? Plenty of Christian have that God-given ability.

((((David))))

Lol no worries, not offended. But I am not uninterested in sex, just not sex with every pretty face. She's gotta earn it with her heart and mind first before I even have the thought or desire to and just some things shouldn't be shared with other's and it shouldn't be talked about like it's some food joint you love going to once a week after work or some casual activity one partakes in.

Why put so much thought and focus on something that gains you nothing?

I have never seen Cowboy say anything negative about sex within a marriage.

I was not trying to dis him. It just sounded to me like he had something against it and it sounded like he was saying even after marriage sex was nothing but duty. I don't know if that is what he was saying just that is what I was seeing.

That's what keeps it special and sentimental rather then again just a casual every day activity. How does one feel special after making love with someone when they know they are only one in a dozen and definitely not the last?

You'll never see me saying anything specifically negative bout sex anyway lol. The things I say negative are about people's actions thereof and or the idea/thought of certain actions. Not specifically sex in itself lol.