Topic: Struggling with this whole on line thing
no photo
Thu 12/19/13 07:27 PM
Hi there

I am new to this whole online meeting people thing.
Any tips or tricks would be appreciated or just a friend to talk to.
Bit about me - sadly my wife passed away two years ago, thanks to a drug driver...REAL PROBLEM ON OUR ROADS...I'm ex RN Police, but left after the accident, I have three boys 1 aged 10 and twins aged 6, and I have devoted my life to them since I became a "civvy".
Sorry to be so crude. But reason I am here is because I have not been "intimate" with a lady since my late wife and in all honesty that is all I am looking for. I work full time within the security services and between that and my boys I have little time for anything else.
Truly I would appreciate someone just saying hi.
I sound really sad now so maybe I should go.

Hope to hear from someone soon

John

soufiehere's photo
Thu 12/19/13 07:33 PM
Edited by soufiehere on Thu 12/19/13 07:44 PM
Seems pretty honest.

Sorry for your loss, it will be a long time before
the coping turns genuine, but life is a journey,
good and bad and everything in between.

Kids help one put one foot in front of the other.

You will probably experience guilt the first time
you are with another...this is pretty normal.

Life is for the living.
Hard lesson to learn, but a good person perseveres.

Oh, and "Hi."

PleasurableLad's photo
Thu 12/19/13 07:42 PM
Hello

I,m no pro at this myself. I have found that when writing a message to a girl its better not to say anything about their looks. Always leave a message with a question about something on their profile. It shows them your into their personality more than just looks. Just be yourself. You sound like a very good dad. Hope you find that special someone that will love you and your kids. Good Luck.
Jeff

no photo
Thu 12/19/13 07:45 PM

Hi there

I am new to this whole online meeting people thing.
Any tips or tricks would be appreciated or just a friend to talk to.
Bit about me - sadly my wife passed away two years ago, thanks to a drug driver...REAL PROBLEM ON OUR ROADS...I'm ex RN Police, but left after the accident, I have three boys 1 aged 10 and twins aged 6, and I have devoted my life to them since I became a "civvy".
Sorry to be so crude. But reason I am here is because I have not been "intimate" with a lady since my late wife and in all honesty that is all I am looking for. I work full time within the security services and between that and my boys I have little time for anything else.
Truly I would appreciate someone just saying hi.
I sound really sad now so maybe I should go.

Hope to hear from someone soon

John




Welcome to Mingle2flowers

no photo
Thu 12/19/13 07:57 PM

Hello

I,m no pro at this myself. I have found that when writing a message to a girl its better not to say anything about their looks. Always leave a message with a question about something on their profile. It shows them your into their personality more than just looks. Just be yourself. You sound like a very good dad. Hope you find that special someone that will love you and your kids. Good Luck.
Jeff


I don't think it's bad to comment on someone's looks as long as you're tasteful about it. Most people like compliments. It's when a guy is vulgar or that's all he's about that it becomes trite and boring.

dcastelmissy's photo
Thu 12/19/13 08:26 PM
So sorry to hear about your loss and the circumstances surrounding it. I have been through similar circumstances, having been hit by a drunk driver back when I was the sole support of three kids. This laid me up for 6 months, and although times were tough, we all made it through just fine, and hopefully you will also. Welcome to Mingle2 and, hopefully, better days to come! :smile:

ridewytepony's photo
Thu 12/19/13 08:27 PM
Edited by ridewytepony on Thu 12/19/13 08:29 PM
Nice to meet you John I'm Jamie.
sorry to here of your loseflowerforyou
I usual like to joke around a fair bit,
I actually am a rare mute with tourette syndrome.
its an involuntary movment of my thumbs when I text.
I don't date on line or haven't yet but have spent a lot of time in the forums here as it was something new
for me.So we definitely need to to travel
out of our comfort zones.
Their is a lot of spammers/spamers on
Dating sites so watch for the deception.
don't give money info..they ask for email
but just report them. I got to go but
I will fill you in more tomorrow. .k
And quite massaging little Jennys ego:wink:
your not helping the little attention
addict, and thats not how you get the
woman anyways..ya got to make em cry
first and when the tears stop then its
ran its coarse...lol love as Pony knows it...lol
ok don't make em cry but we need a medium.
Pony


PacificStar48's photo
Thu 12/19/13 08:36 PM
Edited by PacificStar48 on Thu 12/19/13 08:47 PM

Hi there

I am new to this whole online meeting people thing.
Any tips or tricks would be appreciated or just a friend to talk to.
Bit about me - sadly my wife passed away two years ago, thanks to a drug driver...REAL PROBLEM ON OUR ROADS...I'm ex RN Police, but left after the accident, I have three boys 1 aged 10 and twins aged 6, and I have devoted my life to them since I became a "civvy".
Sorry to be so crude. But reason I am here is because I have not been "intimate" with a lady since my late wife and in all honesty that is all I am looking for. I work full time within the security services and between that and my boys I have little time for anything else.
Truly I would appreciate someone just saying hi.
I sound really sad now so maybe I should go.

Hope to hear from someone soon

John

QUOTE Sorry messed up the quote some.

Sorry it feels like life is kicking your arse. I was widowed with kids and know it is tough as can be.

I retired from social work which is sometimes a contact sport and not exactly free of combat but I get probably not as nasty as some of the stuff you are having swirling around with everything else.

I would do myself a favor and take a booze holiday for a year or so for you and your kids sake. Worked out to be a really good idea for everyone I know and might set a really good example for kids who are learning their grief coping skills from the most important person in their lives.

I would suggest making yourself at home here and maybe the support will help you find some energy for more than just a quickie release. You can, if you chose to, make some awesome friends male and female.

Word to the wise (experience) quickies will tell you it is not what it is cracked up to be and may actually make you regress in your grief process.

You are in luck having twins because Mother's of Multiples is open to Dad's too and it is a great resource. Best wishes Hope Santa brings you what you really need peace, friendship, and a brighter New Year.

DanLee1981's photo
Thu 12/19/13 09:35 PM
Edited by DanLee1981 on Thu 12/19/13 09:37 PM
Hats off to you mate! Honesty is the best policy, I reckon.
You just have to figure out the fakes from the real on here.

My deepest condolences to you and your family.

Hope you find what you're looking for and I do mean that sincerely.

You don't sound sad either mate. You've got to keep your chin up and show you're confident!
Otherwise the trollers will eat you alive!

OR GIVE SHITE ADVICE!!

noway
"I would do myself a favor and take a booze holiday for a year or so for you and your kids sake. Worked out to be a really good idea for everyone I know and might set a really good example for kids who are learning their grief coping skills from the most important person in their lives."noway

What the hell is wrong with you PacificStar48??!!
The man has children to raise for crying out loud.
What a wicked thing to say. I pray for you.



teebee79's photo
Fri 12/20/13 02:19 AM
Welcome to mingle John flowerforyou
So sorry for your grief dear heart...Good Luck in all you seek.

aquamari's photo
Fri 12/20/13 03:03 AM
Hi John i'm sorry for your loss.
I think your introduction is very brave and honest. I hope you find what you are looking for and we see you around the forums. Welcome to mingleflowerforyou

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Fri 12/20/13 04:19 AM
Welcome to Mingle.
I can understand you're looking for an intimate encounter. I do agree with Pacific that a quickie can regress you in your process though. Not saying you shouldn't, but just know it can stir up a lot of emotions (and memories) that you will have to deal with afterwards.

Good luck
flowerforyou

Pacific, I don't get the "booze holiday" advice either. I mean, WTH?